In professional mixes the guitars sound real smooth in the high mids (1k-5k) and aren't harsh, but in alot of less professional recordings the high mids are harsher and not so smooth.
That's because most professional recordings use much, much higher-end amplifiers. In most cases, they have the luxury of selecting between no less than 10 amps before deciding which one gives them the most appropriate tone.
To put things in to perspective ... Have you ever been to a "real" boutique amp store? The kind where they have like 100 amps on hand, private listening rooms, etc.?
Well ... when a band with a real budget and label backing them up goes to do an album ... they can basically walk in to any one of these places, and say "I'll have that one over there ... and that one over there."
Alright, maybe not litereally, but it's not too far off ... same basic idea. Not to mention the fact that most of these guys have the benefit of a dedicated guitar technician or two who's sole job it is to make sure there are no loose wires in your guitar pickups and that all of the tubes in the amp are fresh but not too fresh, etc. etc.
On the other hand ... Johnny Home rec'er is basically limited to either his $100 Crate amp he bought at the pawn shop ... or his buddie's uber-expensive Marshall JCM800

... that's a nice amp but has at least a few years too much wear on it's tubes and along with a somewhat annoying buzz that really should be taken care of before anyon does any serious recording with it.
And rather than having a guitar tech, he has to rely on his bass player's brother, who happens to know a little bit about electronics, and has made a few diy guitar pedals in his day.
Really, Eck. That's the reality of the situation. I'm not saying that it's a hopeless cause for an amateur / diy. But I am trying to point out the reality of the situation ... in other words, this isn't so much about whether or not you're using EQ correctly or if you're using the right mic or anything even remotely associated with tracking or mixing technique.
These guys you're using as your benchmark
are just playing on some really fucking nice guitar amps that most of us would drool over. They obsess over their guitar tone as if it was their first and only child, and they have guys on hand that know their shit when it comes to tweaking this stuff. And issues like harsh high mids? They eat that shit for breakfast.
It's just not part of their world, and will very rarely even enter in to it. And when it does, it's stomped out like an cockroach.
.