Lol - keep going - I like a good rant.
Lol, no I'm about done with Dallas. I think I'll shift my focus to Austin. That's another suckass city. Austin is like Dallas but more hipster. Austin is like the Portland, Oregon of the south, but without the integrity. Portland people actually believe they're doing the right thing with their whacked out local organic farming and hipster ideals. Austin people only do those things because they want to appear cool. Austin is the home of dirty trust fund hippie wannabes that don't drive the BMW their parents bought them because it's cooler to squat and beg on the corner for money. The college fratboys at the University of Texas get a good head start at a life of douchebaggery for when they inevitably relocate to Dallas. The Austin music scene gets a lot of press for being "the live music capital of the universe". Sure, it's fine, if you like cheesy dated ZZ Top wannabe blues rock or talentless indie folk acoustic crap. And Austin is like 3 streets of bars all crammed together. Great for a pub crawl, terrible for everything else. And watch the crackheads. That little "scene" area of Austin is literally surrounded with junkies and crackheads. Literally. It's like The Walking Dead over there. Like zombies, Austin's junkies and crackheads are slow and easy to get away from, but if they surround you, you're done. If you want to play superhero, there's no shortage of women scared to walk back to their cars. You can escort them and keep the junkies at bay and look like a real gentleman. I heard better live music in NYC in one week than I have in 20 years of going to Austin. One afternoon in New Orleans on an otherwise benign tuesday will musically destroy anything Austin can muster up. There are 13 yr old black kids playing 5 string guitars and plastic bucket drums in the French Quarter that will blow your mind.....and they tap dance by gluing bottle caps to the bottoms of their shoes while doing it. So yeah, Austin sucks cock too, but the shit of Austin is more localized to certain areas. It's not the widespread douchebaggery that Dallas has. The rest of Austin is a pretty normal city. Austin is considerably prettier than Dallas though. Beautiful geography around Austin. Dallas, like Houston, is flat, huge, spread out and uninspiring. Austin is smack in the middle of the Texas hill country, and it's quite nice out there.