Here's one dedicated to all of us...

  • Thread starter Thread starter Rick Hansen
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Rick Hansen

Rick Hansen

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...the ones who write the songs.

I want to make this one perfect...all comments are appreciated.

www.soundclick.com/mothersbadson

"After they have gone"

Can it have commercial appeal?

God bless

Rick
a.k.a. Mothers Bad Son
 
Rick Hansen said:
I want to make this one perfect.
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An admirable aspiration . . . put perfection is elusive, if not impossible, so you may have to settle for something less.

You have a set of musical elements that all make sense, and a pretty neat set of lyrics.

The lyrics take the form of a narrative, and makes me think of the likes of story-telling Dylan or Knofler. My initial feeling was disturbed, and as I type, I'm still not sure what my reaction to the song is. I like the narrative style of song, but I think my brain is seeking more character and variation in the vocal delivery. Perhaps it is actually there, but the busy-ness of the backing is detracting from it. I did notice a feeling of relief when the backing changed at around the two-minute mark. Maybe all it is is that there is too much happening at once from the start, and it is only after two mintes that you get to take a mental breath.

I think my discomfort arises from there being an important theme behind the lyrics that is being subordinated to an almost secondary role to the music. I wonder if it is possible to reverse that?
 
Wow

That is the most meaningful Critique I have read in a long long,long time. I am honored that my song invoked such musical trauma, all I ask is for my songs to reach out and touch somehow... good or bad. Thank you very much for listening and I will wrap my head around what you say. I am grateful for your insight sir !
 
Pretty cool. I like your guitar tone and the the choral "aah"s in the background.

The incessant crash was pretty distracting. It fills up the audio without really adding anything.

What's the effect you had on the vocals? It was interesting, but I think it would have been more fitting in a dance or R&B song than a singer-songwriter rock song like this.

Not quite perfect, but a good effort. ;D
 
I'm not sure it can have widespread commercial appeal. Maybe if it was the 80's around the time of the Boss it could do ok....but these days you're gonna need to have lyrics that talk about shopping at Walmart (and loving it) girls with massive behinds and killing people because they disagree with you.

Kind of a real USA feel to this one...with the country trucker type vocals. Not a bad mix. Hot is some areas....maybe even in the vox. That's a big sound you have there.
 
:confused::confused:I thought that Burle Ives only did christmas specials.:D:D (no offense)
Absolutely has commercial appeal. This song hits me as a soundtrack over the credits of a flick, but not as a radio hit.
Is that a vox fx or your natural sound with that chattering type thing on your voice?, either way it is very unique and cool. Great job, very original sounding.
 
Meh, I'm not really digging this at all. The mix is super squashed and one-dimensional. Everything is just loud. The vocals are kind of harsh and too wet. This song would be way better served with more space in the mix and some dynamics. The song is kind of corny. Sorry man.
 
I think it has good timbre/dynamics
Like it in the verses. Quite punchy start then, wham, in comes the verse.
Chorus doesn't strike out enough as a seperate higher and seperate entity than verses - except for a squashed distorted gat slanging its devilish squealch, by your side.
I like the verses. Especially when the vox comes down like, 'real loud...one step from the big time' and '...trying to play guitar.'
I think a good mix. I turned it up a bit.

Cool. Mature. Rockable.
I listened five times. Liked it. Har har, fancy that

And getting used the chorus by that time.
It finishes too early.
 
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Its sounds a bit mushy, muddy to me at first, but then I thought what the heck I kinda dig it.
The song`s got potential IMO, I would start right on the verse though drop the intro kinda reminds me of "Maria" by Blondie.

also I dont know what kinda effect you use on the vox, sounda kinda vocoderish to me, I would loose that and just go with the verb.

cool tune
 
Well the first thing I notice is it's kind of distorted overall, and there's some kind of noticeable edit in the music as the verse repeats..

The backing is also too busy and walks over the vocal. What I do when this happens is start soloing tracks along with the vocal.. Maybe you notice "ahh.. the rhythm guitar and vocal are both competing for this 1.5k frequency.." so you eq some of that out of the guitar, etc, until you've "cut a hole" for the vocal to occupy. That's my technique anyway.
 
Yeah, I liked this - not my kinda thing but immediately reminded me of Dire Straits. But the vocal effect is really sounding weird on my set-up here. Sounds like a tape is getting chewed by my Walkman! What is that?

Aside from the vocal effect, this feels really radio-friendly to me but to have wide commercial appeal these days, it needs a unique touch...or maybe not considering what I hear these days on the radiooooo. I like it though:)

Nice arrangement too.

intomusic
 
I would start right on the verse though drop the intro kinda reminds me of "Maria" by Blondie.
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I can't remember that song, wonder if many of anyone else has heard it? It's no reason to drop this one, unless it was purposely done to re-enact the Blondie one, which I doubt it was. It might seem reminiscent of it, but as someone said it also sounds like Dire Straits; to me there are Roy Orbison touches coming through.
What of all the bands out there today that sound the same as the next one? I do like it. I think it's one of the better songs I've heard yet on this site, so far. I also like It Could Only Be You. Maybe that's a better mix, though still extremely distorted in places. Downbound Train is pretty low bluesy. We haven't a boy straight form the cradle here fo sure.
Maybe there are some mixing issues, like a little over distortion for me. Or, is it more like the artist's own idea of balance? Actually, it has started to hurt my ears a little this afternoon. This morning was alright.
People seem to pick up a slight warp. I can, but it doesn't detract from the song so much, for me.
It still sounds original to me. And through my decent earphones it sounds decent enough, but yeah, it's getting loud now. And, a little over distorted.
You've got some interesting tunes.

PS: Is that your bike?
 
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Just listened to "Maria"...

Hadn't heard that one before, she's really not one I listen to but yea the first 7 or 8 seconds start off with that "chug" guitar which I really like. Great way to get a live crowd into a song quick, I used to use that quite a bit when I played live in another life. Thanks for all the attention on this song, it was a blast to write and record.

Yes, I did make it hot on purpose but I feel a little to much so sometimes. It depends on what speakers I'm listening on and what kind of mood I'm in, I've probably listened to it 100 times and It's different every time.. Someone on this board said years ago that the mark of a good song is that you want to hear it again right away....only louder !

I hope everyone has a great summer and I look forward to hearing some great stuff here.

Rick
 
Kind of an 80's AHA meets Country - mainly because of the reverb vocals + country voice. The whole mix is a bit distorted but it does give it some grit. I'd remix this with more clarity and less grit to try and get a beefy country sound. You have the right voice to make it happen....:cool:
 
First of all, great job on the lyrics. It's got a real blue collar working class hero spirit without being overly corny, wallowing in self pity, and coming across as fake or pretentious.

Now, the production aspect can use a lot of work. I can see the Springsteen-ish wall of sound (phil spector style) working for this song, but you've got a ways to go with the current mix. Everything seems too hot, specially the vox seem to be clipping on my end. I feel like the mix should be busy, but a different kind of busy. That's all I can say man, I dont know how else to describe it.

Good job!

Mike
 
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