King Elvis
New member
I love it!!!
what more can I say...I am speechless
what more can I say...I am speechless
M
mkg
New member
What a fine piece of writing, and what an expressive, emotive voice you have. I would have liked the vocals to be even more prominent, I didn't want to miss any of the imagery. "...rhythms as clear as your eyes" is a powerful line in the context of the story of this song.
Like above, I dug the "insane drum break" also, nice touch.
Don't sell your singing short, it's solid and real.
Good work!
Mark
Like above, I dug the "insane drum break" also, nice touch.
Don't sell your singing short, it's solid and real.
Good work!
Mark
barefoot
barefootsound.com
Outstanding SLuiCe!
Here are a couple things I think would make it even better:
1. The intro synth sounds a bit trite, uninteresting, and preset. I like the first four "cliché" intro guitar bars which contrast the cool changes that come, but the synth just doesn't work.. I'd go with something either more rich and organic, or maybe even the opposite would be better, like nature "romantic" strings for the first 4 bars which reinforce the "cliché" , then morph into something odder and more synthy when the guitar variations set in.
2. After the "...starting to hit me." break you imply a climax which I think never quite fully materializes. Everything, including your singing, should come in bigger after that line, especially the pad. Then it should build to the climax at 2:57 and that pipe organ sound should crank "full ranks" if you know what I mean. Then bring it back to the intimate at 3:14. (I keep hearing something akin to the big crescendo parts in Yes's "And You And I").
Oh yeah, that synth sound during the "...starting to hit me." break could use a little more character as well.
Thanks for the great music!
barefoot
Here are a couple things I think would make it even better:
1. The intro synth sounds a bit trite, uninteresting, and preset. I like the first four "cliché" intro guitar bars which contrast the cool changes that come, but the synth just doesn't work.. I'd go with something either more rich and organic, or maybe even the opposite would be better, like nature "romantic" strings for the first 4 bars which reinforce the "cliché" , then morph into something odder and more synthy when the guitar variations set in.
2. After the "...starting to hit me." break you imply a climax which I think never quite fully materializes. Everything, including your singing, should come in bigger after that line, especially the pad. Then it should build to the climax at 2:57 and that pipe organ sound should crank "full ranks" if you know what I mean. Then bring it back to the intimate at 3:14. (I keep hearing something akin to the big crescendo parts in Yes's "And You And I").
Oh yeah, that synth sound during the "...starting to hit me." break could use a little more character as well.
Thanks for the great music!
barefoot
SLuiCe
New member
And very many thanks for the ideas! I'm still waiting for the right "filler" instruments to come to me...hence the synth stuff. Figure I'll work on something else til then. Thanks a lot Barefoot. You've a good ear!
Michael Jones
New member
What's not to like?
I didn't get in on the earlier mix, but I thought I'd give you my thoughts on this version anyway!
I D/L'd the file so I could hear it on my studio monitors, and not the PC speakers. Then I imported the MP3 and the MP3-wav conversion was done "on the fly".
Hearing the over-all mood of this song, I think the synth intro sounded out of place.
The vocals are very nicely done, with a rich, pleasing warmth that is fully detailed. The vocalist creats a wonderful presence in the song as well.
The dynamics are, well...dynamic. My style would have been to introduce a cresendo rather than the abrupt introduction at varies parts in the song. But then, it's not my song, and the dynamics more than suffice for the presented mood, and come across with an immediate impact.
I thought the introduction of the flute was a VERY nice touch, but in the mix, it sounded kind of distant, but with an elevated volume, that I thought made it lose some of the instrument's gentle-ness.
At around 3:00 in to the song, I heard a rather high pitched "squeal" that I think was supposed to be the flute, but again, it sounded "forced" into the mix.
"Rhythms" is really a very well done production, full of emotion that the artist conveys directly to the listener.
I didn't get in on the earlier mix, but I thought I'd give you my thoughts on this version anyway!
I D/L'd the file so I could hear it on my studio monitors, and not the PC speakers. Then I imported the MP3 and the MP3-wav conversion was done "on the fly".
Hearing the over-all mood of this song, I think the synth intro sounded out of place.
The vocals are very nicely done, with a rich, pleasing warmth that is fully detailed. The vocalist creats a wonderful presence in the song as well.
The dynamics are, well...dynamic. My style would have been to introduce a cresendo rather than the abrupt introduction at varies parts in the song. But then, it's not my song, and the dynamics more than suffice for the presented mood, and come across with an immediate impact.
I thought the introduction of the flute was a VERY nice touch, but in the mix, it sounded kind of distant, but with an elevated volume, that I thought made it lose some of the instrument's gentle-ness.
At around 3:00 in to the song, I heard a rather high pitched "squeal" that I think was supposed to be the flute, but again, it sounded "forced" into the mix.
"Rhythms" is really a very well done production, full of emotion that the artist conveys directly to the listener.
C
CrankyOne
New member
I'm not sure I've heard this before (or maybe I'm just demented). The acoustic guitar mixing is great. The singing is good, and the overall atmosphere works great. You're good at making these walls of sounds and moods. You can pretty much make a conventional song sound more far out (yikes, like, am I a hippie or what?). There's lots of nice little sound bites here and there to make this very interesting to listen to. The song reminded me a bit of some Zeppelin. A bit of "Battle of Evermore" and "Stairway". You're REALLY good at spicing up the mix. I can't think of anything bad about this song. Great.
-EDIT-
And let your girl sing. I guess that made it sound a bit "Battle of Evermore".
-EDIT-
And let your girl sing. I guess that made it sound a bit "Battle of Evermore".
A
Alphonso
Profound
I was looking around and...
I bumped into your song and decided to listen. I like it. I have computer speakers and I still like it. Makes me want to start smoking again. Then again, I better not. Good Song Man.
I bumped into your song and decided to listen. I like it. I have computer speakers and I still like it. Makes me want to start smoking again. Then again, I better not. Good Song Man.
MONTE
New member
ummmmmmmmmmmmmmmm..........WOW! Good writing, good performance, good recording, good mix, etc., etc. I too heard Sting and Dave Mathews influences. Also heard a little CSN. The tune overall sets a great mood. Good stuff.
SLuiCe
New member
Thanks for the remarks everyone. Very helpful as always.
Just one last note since the thread is apparently still alive.... I had her re-take the quick spoken word in the middle. Sounds much better to me now. Nothing like the female element, ya know? I'm hoping to get her to sing on a tune sometime soon. She keeps saying she can sing, but I never hear her! I guess she's one of those people you see driving on the road looking like they're yelling at themselves.....
Just one last note since the thread is apparently still alive.... I had her re-take the quick spoken word in the middle. Sounds much better to me now. Nothing like the female element, ya know? I'm hoping to get her to sing on a tune sometime soon. She keeps saying she can sing, but I never hear her! I guess she's one of those people you see driving on the road looking like they're yelling at themselves.....
B.SABBATH
New member
SLuiCe said:
cool.. it's very subtle.. I thought I heard a few other little enhancements in the background as well? Maybe it was just the voices in my head weaping along in unison..
either way it sounds great..
sam