Elton - nice track. Don't know if this will be helpful, but I am picking up on the bass thing that stll_fiddling did... I was trying to thing of how I would be playing this part and here are some thoughts - not really a bass player so take it with a grain of salt...
It's really on the beat and doesn't move around it at all, the individual notes seem to end to abruptly, I would be rocking back and forth between strings and probably slide between the notes sometimes, in general 'walk' a bit more - and there is one note in particular that bugs me - I'll see if I can figure it out, but in general I kept thinking it should drop down - it just sounds kind of 'odd' like that one note in particular is clashing with some other instrument.
Anyway - I think the tune is cool - but do agree that the bass detracts...