cephus
Slow Children Playing
Lowest Common Denominator?
So, what do you think is the secret ingredient necessary to convince the masses it's "country" they're listening to instead of the "80s garbage pop" that we hear?
I'd love to read your ideas. Maybe we can take of our left over 80s garbage pop 4-track cassettes and slap a little secret sauce on them. We can be the internet version of nashville. We'll sell them at gas stations next to the over-the-counter speeders and cheap sunglasses. I have two ideas myself.
I think the main one is that little yelpy yodle thing that do at the end of every line that sounds Peter Brady. "Time to c~h~a~n~g~e." I spent the last 15 years trying to get my voice to stop doing that so I didn't sound like a cartoon. It shouldn't be hard to unbreak that habit.
Next, you need the pedal steel. It's like you can take any entre at Denny's and dump picante sauce on it and call it "South of the border Style". Pancakes included. Pedal steel being the picante sauce, and kenny chesney being the denny's entre.
I remember a few years ago that 6-year-old from star search (not christina agulera - the one who sang patsy), who has now grown to have perky titties, made a little crossover attempt with a blatantly shitty pop song complete with video of her walking around with erect nipples in a camesole made from wet kleenex. What the hell is her name?!?
Anyway, the thing was so obvious in it's every motive to be a pop song but tried to keep one foot in the country aisle at wal-mart's CD department by sprinkling just the tiniest meow of pedal steel about once every 4 seconds. OK, sometimes it was fiddle. DavidK probably knows how to do the meow thing on the fiddle. Isn't he the bow man from Cleveland?
I look too weird to make a country video. While I was back home, a 400-pound, platinum-blonde beautician asked me if I was gay because I was wearing these narley buddy holly-esque glasses that I paid a shitload of money for. Obviously what's cool on the flat lands ain't neceassarily cool in the valley. I also consider the fact that I was the only guy in the place not trying to get in her pants might have played a factor in her evaluation.
She told me it was the glasses, but I got some fucked up hair, too. I imagine it to look like that johnny bravo cartoon, but most of the time it looks like a cross between don king and the heat-miser from rudolf the red nose reindeer.
http://www.geocities.com/EnchantedForest/1972/jb.jpg
http://www.misfittoys.net/gallery/miser/heat2.jpg
You know what don king looks like.
So, what do you think is the secret ingredient necessary to convince the masses it's "country" they're listening to instead of the "80s garbage pop" that we hear?
I'd love to read your ideas. Maybe we can take of our left over 80s garbage pop 4-track cassettes and slap a little secret sauce on them. We can be the internet version of nashville. We'll sell them at gas stations next to the over-the-counter speeders and cheap sunglasses. I have two ideas myself.
I think the main one is that little yelpy yodle thing that do at the end of every line that sounds Peter Brady. "Time to c~h~a~n~g~e." I spent the last 15 years trying to get my voice to stop doing that so I didn't sound like a cartoon. It shouldn't be hard to unbreak that habit.
Next, you need the pedal steel. It's like you can take any entre at Denny's and dump picante sauce on it and call it "South of the border Style". Pancakes included. Pedal steel being the picante sauce, and kenny chesney being the denny's entre.
I remember a few years ago that 6-year-old from star search (not christina agulera - the one who sang patsy), who has now grown to have perky titties, made a little crossover attempt with a blatantly shitty pop song complete with video of her walking around with erect nipples in a camesole made from wet kleenex. What the hell is her name?!?
Anyway, the thing was so obvious in it's every motive to be a pop song but tried to keep one foot in the country aisle at wal-mart's CD department by sprinkling just the tiniest meow of pedal steel about once every 4 seconds. OK, sometimes it was fiddle. DavidK probably knows how to do the meow thing on the fiddle. Isn't he the bow man from Cleveland?
I look too weird to make a country video. While I was back home, a 400-pound, platinum-blonde beautician asked me if I was gay because I was wearing these narley buddy holly-esque glasses that I paid a shitload of money for. Obviously what's cool on the flat lands ain't neceassarily cool in the valley. I also consider the fact that I was the only guy in the place not trying to get in her pants might have played a factor in her evaluation.
She told me it was the glasses, but I got some fucked up hair, too. I imagine it to look like that johnny bravo cartoon, but most of the time it looks like a cross between don king and the heat-miser from rudolf the red nose reindeer.
http://www.geocities.com/EnchantedForest/1972/jb.jpg
http://www.misfittoys.net/gallery/miser/heat2.jpg
You know what don king looks like.
