Folks won't necessarily scour for the track, but he'll need a good basic "all around" that he can submit for projects, especially if he doesn't have his own setup at home to record custom demo's with (which, BTW, will put him at a HUGE competitive disadvantage).
Here are some good examples of what he needs to compete with:
Bob Souer
DB Cooper
Philip Banks
You can view my site & demos by clicking on my signature line.
What you've recorded could be used as a
starting point, though (and I intend for this to be constructive) it's nowhere near demo quality yet. First starts with the speaker... he has several places on which he needs to correct his enunciation - he tends to jumble and/or trail off at the end of his phrases - and he certainly needs to bring some life into the voice. It's not all about timbre; he needs to show he can animate the words.
Second, the recording would work over an audio bed (which it needs). As it is alone, it's too noisy. Each breath needs to be edited, and then the entire piece should be edited for flow.