Hi,
Thank you Eric V. Yes I'm finding music helps also I've been keeping busy working up to 14 hours daily with only meal breaks replacing a front porch I made and installed about eight years ago; the timber was rotting from the inside out allowing water ingress; only about a cupful of water but it was getting worse so I ripped the lot out. I had used modern joinery grade softwood which was a poor choice; I'd completely sealed it with high end Benjamin Moore paint but must have sealed moisture in also the knots were oozing sap; it looked terrible especially the front door. This new porch is made of Accoya timber which has a 50 year guarantee so should see me out; I also changed the style to include building blocks and Weber OCR render below the window. I made so many silly mistakes during the machining due to Bron constantly on my mind; I routed a joint in the wrong place and made the window frame 7" too wide; I was deeply upset but stuck with it; mistakes can be rectified bringing Bron back can't.
Oh dear; routed too far for the floating tenon.
Almost completed; making and installing this porch helped me through my deepest grief. I've also kept busy with rotavating the meadows and now weather permitting I'm creating a memorial garden for Bron. I'm sorry for going so far off topic but eventually we all pass away but losing someone you love more than you love yourself is incredibly painful indeed.
Thank you TalismanRich; almost 50 years together; closer than many couples because Bron and I only ever had one holiday away from home this was on our first wedding anniversary then Bron started to become ill limiting travelling but as long as we were together nothing else mattered; a true love story in this now awful world.
Thank you Guy for your good wishes. This year has been terrible; Bron passing away was heartbreaking; other troubles were the TV bundle was up for renewal; it was with BT who were wonderful but now with EE it was equally as bad as when we were with Virgin Media; hours and hours spent sorting it out and I wanted to go with EE for my new first mobile phone but gave up in the end going with iD sim only 12 month deal; a hugely better deal than EE . iD are so much better and account up and running in about 15 minutes. Last week I spent four highly frustrating days due to a leaking bathroom mixer tap rubber washer which refused to stop leaking; this in total cost around £120 before I fixed it; I replaced the 12 month old mixer tap with a new mixer tap. When I say this year is bad here's what caused the leak;
A thumb nail clipping which must have been hiding in the tap; I'd even recut the tap seat and run my little finger all around under the tap seat ; I'd replaced the washer four times; inspected closely with a small LED torch and even in the workshop under the large LED panel lamp still no sign of what was causing the leak then suddenly I noticed something drop into the cold water port although it was the hot tap leaking; it was this nail clipping. Bring on the next problem because I think after what I've suffered so far in 2025 I'm now bullet proof.
Thanks Slouching Raymond; it's good to be feeling better and engaging on forums again; I'm rather a loner and no longer trust people; Bron and I over the years had so many problems with my family and so called friends we were better off in our own company; I'm not feeling lonely because I will always love Bron deeply; she's still with me and always will be.
I do need to embrace my new life and I'm now making the effort; I'll never play in a a group setting; violin playing is my hobby and also now I've an interest in playing guitars. I've been watching YouTube videos covering both violin and guitar playing. I'm truly in awe of solo violinists and want to set my Yamaha YEV104 violin and Yamaha THR10 amp to sound like the solo violins but in order to do this I might need a pedal;
I've played around with settings on the amp but can't get the sound I really want; this is something interesting I want to experiment with; I've been playing the violin in the front room but now it's time to put the heating on in the studio and access all my recording gear; it will soon be winter then I'll be indoors a lot more. I'm as keen as ever to progress with my violins.
Thanks once again to everyone for your sympathy and welcome replies; all are appreciated. Now it's time to get myself sorted out not feeling so sorry for myself.
Kind regards, Col.