Song Feedback

[Physical Ill]

i've been gone for like 30 years...but really i haven't put up a song in about a year, i wanna know what you all think: (put together pretty quickly, don't expect perfect quality)

http://www.zshare.net/audio/809312417205ead5/

and soundclick if that doesnt work:

http://soundclick.com/share?songid=9720501

 

[jlewis]

upload this somewhere else like soundclick and I'll give it a listen, zshare isn't working for me.

 

[Physical Ill]

http://soundclick.com/share?songid=9720501

 

[jlewis]

it has a nice sound and I see what you're going for but the content and delivery aren't quite there yet. Try to give your flow some more variety. As for content, there were a lot of lines that didn't add up and a lot of ambiguous stuff, which is fine, but I didn't feel like the imagery that they were giving was relevant or strong enough to be used in that way. keep it up

 

[Terra]

its sounding alright...your flow is way off though, practice the lyrics more...and your lyric structure is choppy and rhyme structure is is predictable. The beat is alright, just the lyrics probably need to be re-written.

 

[Physical Ill]

elaborate please...on the flow portion

 

[Terra]

elaborate please...on the flow portion

it just seems like it's a bit choppy and predictable. If you practiced it and smoothed it out, it would be better.

 

[Terra]

and is this beat a sampled muse song? if it is, tread carefully.

 

[Physical Ill]

naw and it's not my beat anyway. it's just promo stuff, im not selling anything

 

[Terra]

naw and it's not my beat anyway. it's just promo stuff, im not selling anything

ok cool. it definitely sounds good, and you have a ton of potential. Just keep it up.