new song (sad)

  • Thread starter Thread starter LI_Slim
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LI_Slim

LI_Slim

voice in the wilderness
This is something I've been working on. What's your reaction?


I Don’t Know How to Miss You by Larry Kolker © 2004

Faded photographs
You always smiled for pictures
Here’s your simple epitaph
You weren’t much for scriptures

You’d think I would have known by now
That you would never be my guide
The love I want I must provide
I’m just embracing solid air
I don’t know how to miss you, ‘cause you were never really there

You always did say please
Never could say sorry
Walked on stiff and damaged knees
Not much pride nor folly

You’d think I would have known by now
You cannot give what you don’t own
And I was always all alone
It doesn’t matter if you cared
I don’t know how to miss you, ‘cause you were never really there

Now I close the book
Now I end the chapter
I will just forgive you now
Without tears or laughter

You’d think I would have known by now
You cannot give what you don’t own
So I will make this solemn vow
To start right here to start right now
I don’t know how to miss you, ‘cause you were never really there
I don’t know how to miss you, ‘cause you were never really there
 
Do you have a recording of this? I'd like to hear it to music. I love the "embracing air" line (not crazy about using solid before it). The chorus line is very powerful. I think the 2nd two lines of the first verse could be re-worked, I didn't make a connection with it, but that's probably just me. I dig it dude, love to hear it with music!
 
Thank you Jeff.

I agree with you about "solid".

No recording yet. It does have music though. I will let you know.
 
some post-hack feedback?

I revised it a bit, especially the last chorus, as follows:

I Don’t Know How to Miss You by Larry Kolker © 2004

Faded photographs
You always smiled for pictures
Here’s your simple epitaph
You weren’t much for scriptures

You’d think I would have known by now
That you would never be my guide
The love I want I must provide
I’m just embracing the air
I don’t know how to miss you, ‘cause you were never really there

You always did say please
Never could say sorry
Walked on stiff and damaged knees
Not much pride nor folly

You’d think I would have known by now
You cannot give what you don’t own
And I was always all alone
It doesn’t matter if you cared
I don’t know how to miss you, ‘cause you were never really there

Now I close the book
Now I end the chapter
I will just forgive you now
Without tears or laughter

You’d think I would have known by now
There's noone else to blame but me
Each has his own capacity
It's not a thing to do with fair
I don’t know how to miss you, ‘cause you were never really there
I don’t know how to miss you, ‘cause you were never really there
 
I really like "I don’t know how to miss you, ‘cause you were never really there". That's a great line
 
that is an awesome line! i also like the lyrics too. would love to hear how it sounds with the music and all!
 
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