feedback please (2 songs)

  • Thread starter Thread starter redheadedboy
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redheadedboy

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for the long, slow song, please visit:


i've also got this one - which is a bit more accessible:


please be as critical as possible. i promise not to be offended. ;)

thanks in advance.
--tim
 
Good

Nice song. The vocal harmonies sound cool. I would give the vocals a little more clarity by taking some low end out and adding some high mids and high end and wetten them a little more, they are somewhat dry. The guitar sounds good, especially in the beginning, sometimes a little too much chorus for my tastes, also, maybe add a little reverb to the guitars to fill up some space in the middle of the song. The drums needed the most work i thought, no kick, and the high hat or whatever, it didn't work, they just didn't flow. The end section out of the break down is very cool. Possibly try to eq the bass to sound a little more crisp and smooth. Overall, cool song.

Genie
 
What's good: the reverb's really nice, the jangly guitars are right, and that beautiful liquid guitar at the beginning is topped only by the heavenly chorus in the middle. Damn, that's pretty.

What needs some attention: the drums in the first half. It's the wrong rhythm. It needs to be more sinuous and laid back, less boppy/happy/hoppy. The drumming distracts from the reflective/introspective feel of the song.

What I'd've done differently :D: that heavenly chorus is really glorious. Afterwards, the vox gets buried a bit when the band opens up, so I'd've either 1) turned up the volume on the girl, or 2) just extended the glorious heavenly chorus another 15-20 seconds with the band opened up and ended the song that way.

Nice, nice sound overall.
 
thanks for the great feedback, guys.

we'll be sure to incorporate these suggestions when we remix (and possibly re-record) some of the parts.

one other thing -- on mir.mp3, did you think the guitars were too bright at the end? when i listen to it, it sounds very piercing...but since neither of you commented on that i guess it's ok :)
 
Nope - the guitars at the end were what I was referring to as 'jangly', which is a nice adjective in my book. I notice piercing right off, and your tune wasn't piercing.
 
Hey red,

I listened to Mir. It's a nice song... your female vocalist has a great voice--she should open up a bit more, because she sounds great.

I'd agree with the others... the drums are a little under-represented there in the mix, up until around 2:40 where they suddenly appear. They sound like they're down the hall in the back bedroom, or something!

I dig the jangly thing going on around 3:00. Sounds almost harpsichord like-- how are you getting that sound?

Pete
 
hey Pete,

the jangle sound is my Edge rip-off...
it's just delayed (three against four) but poorly eq'd
(it wasn't supposed to be that bright!)

--tim
 
Evertything dobro said....

Very nice.

Little frustrating waiting for the vx to come forward, but don't. Too bad, too, cause those harmonies were scrumptious!
 
On mir.mp3, I agree with the drums being a bit weak in the first part of the song, up until 2:35. They should be there more.

As for the jangly guitar, I like it. But towards the end of the song it blocks out the vocal. Go to 2:35 where it comes in and listen for a couple of seconds and the jump to 3:20 and listen. The guitar has gotten quite louder by that point and that's where the vocals are. I might try lowering it with respect to the vocal (which might only mean keeping it the same volume it was in the beginning). For those last two choruses I think the vocal got overcrowded so it's hard to hear the words.

The snare has kind of a "pong" sound to it. I know drummers like to have a tone to their drums. (We always used to try to talk drummers into tuning their heads lower). I'm not sure I'm crazy about that sound and might go for something else. But I guess it's really subjective. Nothing wrong with it.

Is it me, or does the tempo slow down at 3:14 until about 3:18? I thought that was noticeable. Wow, I'm really being fussy now. I better stop. But I also liked the harmonies. Harmonies are always my favorite thing.
 
mir.mp3

is one awesome song!!

All I could pick out as needing work is the kick and snare.

peace
 
I'm listening to "mir" right now....

I like this song.... it sounds like a tune that Lisa Loeb would love to steal for her own. ;)
Mix-wise, I won't be redundant.... the other guys covered it pretty well.
Nice job, though.
I'm going to give it a second listen! :)

Buck
 
thanks for all the feedback, guys!

you've done wonders to our singer's esteem! (no joke!) she has been holding back a bit, but has new-found enthusiasm in these comments...but now our drummer is a bit sad... ;)

(and i promise i'll back off the guitars at the end and allow the vocals to come forward)

--tim
 
I listened to Halcyon. Really cool. Everything is really well done. I like that kind of drumming, too. Sort of a sixties influence, right? With those rolls and stuff. Don't really like the sound of the snare, but that's just my taste. Vocals are real nice. The whole dreamy thing, really cool. How did you record this, and who are your influences, if you don't mind my asking?

Macle
 
I listened to Halcyon. Overall good work. Appropriate guitar playing and mixing.

Some points:

1. The drums could have been done a little simpler. Theres a way to keep things interesting without overaccenting and over filling so the groove gets lost.

2. I would bring the bass forward 3-4dB more and put a little more top end on the bass drum. Good live drum sound. The snare is cool.

3. I thought the vocals were too far set back though..taking into account the intended dreaminess of the song. Also I would do some soft 2:1 compression on the mixdown. It seemed to be a bit mid weak, especially in the low mid area. Maybe do a 3-4dB boost from 350-750Hz and see what that sounds like.
 
I will be as honest as possible:

The song is great, really great (who wrote it?) The lyrics are very cool, and well thought through. (mir)

The singer's vocal quality is excellent, a unique and recognizable quality to it. In tune, etc....Drummer needs to be more agressive on fills and break ins.

The mix, well, the mix needs a lot of work. It sounds like a rough mix at best. Most A & R guys (I used to be one) would probably listen to this based on the vocals alone, but if were someone else singing, would turn it off based on the poor mix.

Suggestions? Listen..... do the levels of each track sound even throughout? Keep vocals in front and even throughout.

Are you balancing each track against every other track individually?

Are you monitoring on headphones? Listen to it on everything from PC speakers to your car stereo, then remix. I know that once you have spent hours on end listening to a song, it all runs together. Maybe you should let someone else in the studio, or take a rest from it for a week or so?

I played this for a few knowledgable producers/musicians and they all agreed - the song/singer is great, the arrangement is good (except for that breakdown at 2:20 I would cut it completely, it breaks the momentum - and the song just kind of ends), the mix needs work.

Edit - the secretary where I work just walked back here and "Who is this?" She is in her 20's. Wants me to make her a copy. A great compliment. You really may have something here - may be worth going into a pro studio. I didn't care much for the other song, try to stay in the style of "Mir".

Respectfully,
Mr. SM 57
 
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mr sm57 -- i'm quite flattered. thank you for the compliments and great feedback...

when we mix (on monitors and headphones) we try to bang it out in a few hours. we've only recently begun writing down the board settings when we're done with a mix so we can tweak certain instruments/frequencies after listening to it on different systems.

unfortunately, we only had 8 tracks (1 adat) when we started and bounced the hell out of everything (guitars and drums are each their own stereo pair) we also recorded the whole song without knowing who would sing it -- which led to some guitars totally stomping on the vocals.

based on the feedback i've received from you and the other members, it looks like we're going to have to re-record the whole song to fix some of the mix/arrangement issues...but at this point, i don't mind! i'm very motivated to get it done right.

thanks,
tim
 
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