JimmyS1969
MOODerator
Welcome rfpd.
Guitar is way boomy in the low end. I mean way too much low end from maybe 250 down.
Start there.
I hear some pitch issues with vocals but you may be able to work that better without the guitars being so flubby.
Guitar is way boomy in the low end. I mean way too much low end from maybe 250 down.
Start there.
I hear some pitch issues with vocals but you may be able to work that better without the guitars being so flubby.
R
rfpd
Member
I played it in standard D, yeah I don't consider myself a singer ahah, I don't have a good tone. As long as it's 'hearable'. Thanks for the feedback
!
Monkey Allen
Fork and spoon operator
SOunds like a lot of Kurt Cobain's home demos. Very early 90's grungy!
R
rfpd
Member
Nirvana is my favourite band and it's not the first time I get that ahah. I want it to be more indie though, more like Sufjan Stevens or Elliot Smith. I suck at producing, so this is the best I can do :/
TAE
All you have is now
I took a listen. Though you are more talking than singing in this one your pitch control tells me you can sing you just have to work at it and find "your voice".
Curt would do the talk/singing thing but then he'd let it rip and that was his trademark. In this song it is not monotone it is monotonous...there are no highs and lows no real emotion in either the playing or singing...volume is set at 5 and remains the same through the whole song..
songs usually have a message and the more successful ones somehow convey emotion and feeling in them...you'll need to work on that.
Playing an instrument in front of people / strangers is one thing singing in front of them is another...least that is my experience. It only took me 40 years to really break out and start singing regularly. It's fun now though.
You can sing...but you may not want to sing because of being insecure about it...If down deep you want to sing, I'd encourage you to take a voice class at the local junior college that will allow you to understand techniques that will allow you to sing more confidentlyr and then from there it's just growing the cajones to do it live.
Curt would do the talk/singing thing but then he'd let it rip and that was his trademark. In this song it is not monotone it is monotonous...there are no highs and lows no real emotion in either the playing or singing...volume is set at 5 and remains the same through the whole song..
songs usually have a message and the more successful ones somehow convey emotion and feeling in them...you'll need to work on that.
Playing an instrument in front of people / strangers is one thing singing in front of them is another...least that is my experience. It only took me 40 years to really break out and start singing regularly. It's fun now though.
You can sing...but you may not want to sing because of being insecure about it...If down deep you want to sing, I'd encourage you to take a voice class at the local junior college that will allow you to understand techniques that will allow you to sing more confidentlyr and then from there it's just growing the cajones to do it live.
andrushkiwt
Well-known member
Didn't read other comments. Someone must like Cobain. lol. Sounds like something you'd hear on the multi-disc demo release.
Not sure why you'd say you don't have a good tone, cause I think you do. It's just fine. Can you bring your voice up 12 steps? If this were to be electric version, would you be able to scream it at the next root interval? The guitar is pretty muddy, so I'd adjust your microphone position and play with it until you get a more rounded, clear sound. Vocal sounded ok, but I think you'd be able to take your music to another level if you could sing higher. Not saying you can't, because this song didn't display higher pitches, just that it would be nice if you could.
I'll tell you this though, if you keep recording this stuff this way, you'll eventually want to move to full-on productions. I'd bet money on it. So, stick around, improve your recordings, work on your vocals, and post here frequently. We're here to help. Nice song and melodies.
Not sure why you'd say you don't have a good tone, cause I think you do. It's just fine. Can you bring your voice up 12 steps? If this were to be electric version, would you be able to scream it at the next root interval? The guitar is pretty muddy, so I'd adjust your microphone position and play with it until you get a more rounded, clear sound. Vocal sounded ok, but I think you'd be able to take your music to another level if you could sing higher. Not saying you can't, because this song didn't display higher pitches, just that it would be nice if you could.
I'll tell you this though, if you keep recording this stuff this way, you'll eventually want to move to full-on productions. I'd bet money on it. So, stick around, improve your recordings, work on your vocals, and post here frequently. We're here to help. Nice song and melodies.
Nola
Well-known member
It was pretty cool. Nice to hear something that sounds so similar to Nirvana. Where's the tension and release of Nirvana, though? Usually they did a buildup in either the music or the vocal, but I didn't hear anything like that.
The recording was a little tubby, and I think I hear artifact on the vocal (did you tune them?)
The recording was a little tubby, and I think I hear artifact on the vocal (did you tune them?)
R
rfpd
Member
I mean, I tried, but I really suck at producing and adding drums and those kind of things. I'm really liking Sufjan Stevens and indie folk in general, he makes good songs without drums.
R
rfpd
Member
Thank you all for the feedback, I wasn't expecting something so positive, tbh I think my music is shit haha. But I'll be sure to keep you posted, so that you guys can give me some feedback. Next song I want to make something of a mixture between Sufjan Stevens, Jack White and indie folk in general.
R
rfpd
Member
R
rfpd
Member
erase
Last edited:
spantini
COO of me, inc.
I was just listening to Jack White and Loretta Lynn's album.. that would be interesting.
T
trusso11783
Member
Sounds like a Nirvana rip-off, like a monotone Rape Me. Not bad but not at all original. Very repetitive. It just drones on for the entire song. Flesh it out. Write a better chorus and maybe use part of that as an intro. Good luck.
JimmyS1969
MOODerator
Well that was a personal opinion wasn't it?
Songwriting is personal. I tend to be more of a producer and try to evolve and find the best of musicians songs. I do agree there could be much more movement by you here. BUT! It is your baby.
I would first ask 'Where is the chorus'? Even though there is kind of one, there is no change of the droning guitar line. Maybe that is a good thing? Maybe not. Ask yourself.
Cheers!
