all that i need is two minutes...of your time

  • Thread starter Thread starter erichenryus
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dobro, i just saw your comment after posting that long reply.

man, i'm flattered by your comments. i absolutely love that last song you posted: 'mineral'.

i see what you mean about the guitars. they are kind of in your face. i guess that's the thing i was most focused on when recording so what do you know? they came out the loudest.

glad you like the opening line. i like it to :D

thanks for taking the time to listen.
 
cool tune ... like the guitar sound ... midrangy but warm ... very modern thing to me ... vocals are not very tight as is playing ... crank that loop up and play tightly with the rythm ... when you layering instruments/vocals you just have to be as close to the beat as you can IMHO ... I thoght after acapela part you can do acc gtr lead and then go into that high vocal part on top of that. That would build it up make it a little longer.
cheers
 
Hey Eric, that's really good! It's got a really good vibe about it. That chord progression, always a good one! With the harmonies, it's really 'old fashioned', but with the lead vocal sung the way you sing, the groove, and the stripped down acoustic sound, then the chord progression becomes more 'old school', and fresh and ready for alternapop college radio. :) Things that stand out are the drums, I always prefer real ones.... Didn't like the low harmony in the acapella part, and that bass at the end, plus, I'd prefer a real bass as opposed to a keyboard one. But, really, I'd say don't worry about anything, just keep doing what you're doing...

Macle

P.S. What are your influences, btw, what do you listen to?
 
Good job, man. Listening on PC speakers right now, so I can't hear the real details, but, I think the lead vocal might need a little work, like taking more breath in between lines/words, perhaps a little compression. Just my opinion.

But I really like this song, happy, and a little old fashioned like Macle mentioned.

AL
 
...weird.??...stil havent recieved my copy yet??......must be a slow mail day....











:D jamal....im sure yer busy polishing this jewel (please this is not a joke)....lmao..

jamal
 
Fed: Thanks for checkin' it out. Apologies for never getting around to the Erland tune that you worked so hard on. Family, job, hobbies,....too much to balance! I am consistently overcomitted. Good points about the perils of doing it all yourself. Gotta stick tight with the band but there's no one else in the room but me! I would much rather play with a live band any day but such is the situation. So I'll crank up the click next time around and pretend I'm amoung friends.

Macle: Wow, macle is in the house! Your stuff is so well put together I'm embarassed that you stopped to listen, but thankful none the less! I too prefer the real thing and one day I will have a real drumset and play real loud in my soundproof home studio with other other real people. For now, I have a v-kit, some midi gear, and a computer. I'll put the kit to work on the next version. I listen to a very wide variety of music. Music I have currently in rotation include: John Mayer, Chris Cornell, Norah Jones, Hillary Hahn playing Bach's violin partitas, Lakme by Delibes, thelonius monk, Oliver Messian's Vignt Regards, and Bulgarian Women's Choir. I have to admit Erland's music is always in my rotation and dobro's last post will not leave my head. since I know your a beatles fan, i'll admit that I've spent a lot of time in the past listening to them (never get's old) and actually listened to mcartney's 'flowers in the dirt' cd like a drug for a while. and i sing blackbird to my kid every night when i'm putting him to sleep.

A1A2: That lead vocal get's worse everytime I listen to it. It will definitely be redone. I'm happy to have written a happy song. I find macle's stuff pretty upbeat as well and it's just so refreshing these days. Too much negative coming at us from the radio I think. Thanks for listening.

jamal: well you never sent me your address! have you noticed the caption below B.SABBATH these days? Now that is funny shit. I don't know why he thinks you're the same person but it cracks me up. Lot's of humor on this forum lately. I promise to send you a copy once I finish it.
 
erichenryus said:

jamal: well you never sent me your address! have you noticed the caption below B.SABBATH these days? Now that is funny shit. I don't know why he thinks you're the same person but it cracks me up. Lot's of humor on this forum lately. I promise to send you a copy once I finish it.
Click to expand...

hey!...have you noticed the "caption"beneath my name yet??

lol
 
Hey Eric....very cool song. I did like the low harmony although it could have blended a little better but the harmonies throughout the song are great. I also liked the structure of the song...it reminded me a lot of someone but I can't put my finger on it right now. I agree with getting rid of that last bass thing but if I'm reading it right...that was just 'cause you were playing around with the tune trying to figure out what you were gonna do.
This is definitely something you should keep working on...you have the core of an extremely cool tune here.
 
Whoah, what a FUN SONG :D :D :D

*giggle*

As for the *song* - dont touch a thing.

As for the mix:

- hit the lead vox w. compression, its wavering around in level too much.

- way too low lead vox

- WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY to low drums ... smack 'em down w. compression to get a big phatass crunchy groove going. Some dist wouldn't hurt either.

- acoustic guitars.... too loud. Nice sounding, but the playing isn't "tight" enough to take the rythmic burden as they do now.... by just bringing their level down, will fix it coz the drums will then rightfully regain the rythmic authority

- backing vocals rocks. Including the low line in the a-capella bit.

To exten this song: Where it currently ends, make a DRUM SOLO. Yes, I never though I would say this, but for this particular track... goddamn...a freaking DRUM SOLO, then up one semitone and do the chorus again, and then a chorus which you fade out. (Never thought I'd say that either, I never ever ever ever ever fade out..... :) )

Lovely funny song. Lovely. Just frrrrrrrrrrreaki'n lovely.

Btw, some sprinkles of autotune on the lead vox could help, and I mean gently, but frankly I think just compressing it would be good enough... you see for some funny reason one "perceives" lever wavering as pitch wavering... compress it to a nice and flat thing, and it'll sound tigher AND even more on... (The lead vocal never 'really' off, but it's not just completely on all the time :) )

/Z
 
Cool,pop sounding in a good way with a tinge of violent femmes.
I'm not going to comment on the mix as I'm not qualified.
I love the acappela breakdown.
 
jamal: lmfao!

lt. bob: thanks for the comments. that low part is as low as i can go so it's real shaky. that's actually the hardest part of the song for me. but i have some singer friends who i'm going to enlist for the next version. btw, can't wait to hear crawdad's tune. welcome back.

zap: a drum solo!!! hmmmmmmm. i like that idea. it'll have to be short though. usually i don't like them, but you know there's a jimmy eat world song on the radio lately that has a pretty cool drum break in it. something short and thrashing might sound good. thanks for the wonderful idea!

acidrock: i like the acappela thingy too. covers my entire pitch range. violent femmes? i like them too. i've gotten so many varied comments about who this sounds like that i'm not surprised by any now.
 
it'll have to be short though
Click to expand...

Ah yeah. We are talking 2 bars of mayhem, tops. (Possibly only 1)

Wham-bam-bodom-bam-bam-badabam-broof Snap-crak-bambam........badaBosh.

Then bang back into chorus raised a halfstep and yer on the HOOOME RUUUUN :)

/Z
 
LAST SELFISH POST

Eric...you 'bout done with this yet? Got another 2 minutes for us yet?
 
eric - good stuff. I have a lot of comments - feel free to ignore them all; they're probably wrong. ;)

I really like the song. Nice laid back feel, the chord progression and the harmonies definitely have a retro feel, but the lyrics are very up to date (and very well written).

I really like your lead vocal style - urgent, edgy, breathy, cool. Liked the wee "extra" vocal bits too.

I think there are two directions you could go with the backing vocals:

1. Really tighten them up in pitch and timing - lots of takes, comp together the best, Autotune, etc.

2. Double or triple track each part, don't worry too much about exact pitching or timing, and put them "back" a bit in the mix. Make it sound like a whole room full of people singing sort of together.

I think 2 would be cooler. ;)

Acoustic - nice playing. Too loud, and it's clashing with the vocals sometimes. Compress and roll off some (more) lows on the guitars. Put them in some space. By the way, loved the harmonics.

Also, compress the hell out of the lead vocal (not the bvs). The levels vary too much just now.

Bass - too boomy. Sculpt some space above and below with some EQ. Make the sound a bit more "punchy" and defined. Also, leave some space in the playing itself - try a bit more of a "McCartney" feel with shorter, almost stacatto notes with space between them. Steal some of macle's bass ideas. Hell, steal as many of macle's ideas as you can - I know I intend to. ;)

Drums - loops can be cool. They should be louder. Play some real drums on top - you're a great player, let's hear it!

Loved the "whistling" sounding synth. Turn it up a wee bit.

Hope this is useful. I really like the song, and I think you should preserve the loose, laid back feel. It's very cool.

Cheers

AB
 
Whoa ... wasn't prepared for that beginning. Cool tune here...reminds me of Michael Penn ...

I really like the rhythm of this especially as it goes into the chorus. I think the harmony works and I like your vocals on this, though at times they sound a little bit hot -- imhop --

The overall mix sounds a little bit bassy, but that may be on my end :)

Definitely need to get a strong ending on there. In just the 2 minutes that you have so far it really takes the listener to a lot of different places. With just the right ending, this thing could probably be a hit...

Very good writing! :)
 
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