The all new Project Studio funny stories thread

[ido1957]

Me - I'll feed you a click track into your headphones.
Guitar Player - What's a click track ?

Me - Why do you keep stopping?
Guitar Player - The click track is off time!

Singer - I can't hear myself.
Me - Put on the headphones!

 

[JimmyS1969]

Rehearsing a part with a band once. The bass player and I (drumming) were working out a part with the guitar player. About 15 minutes in, the guitar player yells "Hey!! Did anyone even notice a haven't been playing?" Bass player says, well then play something, don't just throw a tantrum! While stomping his foot on the ground to each word, guitar player says, like a child, "I'm Not Throwing A Temper Tantrum!!!" I fell of my stool in laughter.

 

[ido1957]

Rapper - how much do you charge?
Me - $50 an hour
Rapper - Great I have 12 four minute tracks to record!

 

[JimmyS1969]

That's like 5 days right?

 

[Chili]

Me - Why do you keep stopping?
Guitar Player - The click track is off time!

Wait a second, you can't fool me... you are teh guitar player!!

Rehearsing with a band, the DRUMMER said the click track was off. He didn't last long.

 

[Guitargodgt]

"needs more distortion"
<turns up knob>
"more"
<turns up more>
"more"
<turns up more>
"more"
IT DOESN'T TURN UP ANY MORE THAN THAT.

 

[moresound]

Vocalist;
This part needs a lot more reverb ........

Me;
Pretending to move the knob ..........

Vocalist;
Yeah that perfect!
Right there!
That's great!

I hate days like that.

 

[kidkage]

"Fuck this stupid dead mixer " . Then I realized I had two different cable ends plugged in

 

[Steenamaroo]

Vocalist;
This part needs a lot more reverb ........

Me;
Pretending to move the knob ..........

Vocalist;
Yeah that perfect!
Right there!
That's great!

I hate days like that.

Love that! Funny as.

Works for 'turn me up a bit' too. I slide up one of the faders on my wbs modules. Little does the customer know they're only effective during tracking.

 

[Capt Hair]

Me: Tracking now *count in*
Friend: *starts to play*.........F***!.....My bad.....ssssshhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
Me: Playing back.
Friend:........why were you talking while I was recording?




He has turrets when he plays lol

 

[moresound]

Female client;
Are you sure that singing topless doesn't restrict my singing?

Me;
Oh yeah!




This was in a dream I had once.

 

[FunkDaddy]

Female client;
Are you sure that singing topless doesn't restrict my singing?

Me;
Oh yeah!




This was in a dream I had once.

No joke this actually happened to me. At first she just wanted to take her sports bra off (had just come from the gym) than just decided to do away with the top entirely. I shit you not.

 

[Capt Hair]

No joke this actually happened to me. At first she just wanted to take her sports bra off (had just come from the gym) than just decided to do away with the top entirely. I shit you not.

We need to make this a new standard technique in the audio world.

 

[CrowsofFritz]

This happened to me and my friend mixing ourselves. My friend used Drumagog and then placed an EQ BEFORE the drumagog plug-in. So it makes no difference.

Friend- I really want to turn down the attack on this tom.

Me- Lower the (i can't remember what frequency) range a little bit..... Yeah! Right there!

Friend- Oh yeah that sounds much better!

Me- Wait..... is it even doing anything?!

 

[ido1957]

No joke this actually happened to me. At first she just wanted to take her sports bra off (had just come from the gym) than just decided to do away with the top entirely. I shit you not.

I like it! But seriously I can see the benefit of no bra but no shirt? Hell why not..!

 

[Armistice]

Trying to train the GF to help me track a difficult acoustic guitar piece to a click - I have the headphones on and she can't hear anything of the backing, just me playing.

Me: "If I stop playing just hit stop and rewind and go back to the start and I'll try again"

I was trying to just tell her, if I fuck up, I'll stop playing and we'll try another take. NO need for me to tell you, just do it.

It worked OK whilst I was fumbling, but then I got all the way through, perfect take, and two seconds after I hit the last big chord AND STOP PLAYING she hits the off button..... thus killing the entire take because there's now no nice fade out happening because she cut it off...

DOH!!!!! My own fault, but it highlights the difficulty of using untrained amateur labour...

 

[moresound]

No joke this actually happened to me. At first she just wanted to take her sports bra off (had just come from the gym) than just decided to do away with the top entirely. I shit you not.

You crazy Canadians!

 

[ido1957]

Pop filters prevent distortion!

 

[PDP]

Me: How can we get this guitar player to turn down ?

Piano Player: Put sheet music in front of him!

 

[ido1957]

Guitar Player - what are those weird sounds on the drum track?
Me - that's your drummer constantly hitting the drum mics.