Rubber isn't that bad for acoustic volume.
Mesh is the quietest IMO.
Real heads, even when deadened by rubber or other stuff is the loudest.
Rubber cymbals are much MUCH quieter than the surge stuff or pretty much any coated plastic ekit cymbal.
2nd floor e kit bass drum pedals are loud as hell through the floor. I have never tried it myself but others have reported putting the ekit on a piece of plywood mounted on tennis balls to attenuate the noise.