Thanks for the help, here's the Result

  • Thread starter Thread starter nwduffer
  • Start date Start date
N

nwduffer

New member
After reading here for a couple years, getting some personal tips on gear and technique, and a few trial runs, I finally got a decent mic and have done a full original song (actually a couple, but I'll spare you all of them for now...). Guitars and vocals recorded by me into my computer, drums and key's programming done by my buddy (on his computer...we live across the country from each other) and all of it mixed together.

Here's the download link for my song, Finally Free.


This one may (or may not) stream it Hi-Fi for you too
http://buzzsawmusic.com/music/default.asp?q=m&m=/FinallyFree-demo-july02.mp3

My setup: AT4033 mic, Taylor Koa LE acoustic, ART MP tube pre, Cool Edit Pro for recording software.

Thanks for listening!

Paul
 
Very professional vocal, man. gotta say "w/5" just for those, cuz people hear should hear them...

The song is very pop-vocal, and seems quite radio friendly. Commercial possibilites abound. The only things performance/mix wise are:

1) Needs more level
2) The drums sound "claustrophobic"... then need more "space"... the snare sounds particularly "dodgy".
3) You can hear the metronome click in the outro :D

Nice stuff... again "w/5" (as per Guernica :))


Chad
 
BUMP!!!! :D:D

Very nice. You've definitely get a good voice. This is a good song. I'd like some harmonies, and the organ (I'm sure I hear one) needs to come up some. I also would like the drums up a bit too. All nit-picking 'cause this is good stuff.
 
Wow. A great demo here! The recording is really right for this and your voice is excellent. You had me totally engaged--right up till the bridge and final chorus.

Indulge me for a second and excuse my butting in, but you have 4/5ths of an incredible song here. Two things: first the last verse and bridge have to go to something other than you (1st person) I think. I don't know what--a universal tying together of how we ALL feel? Or a final single person to set that example? Its like its building up to a big point, but it doesn't come. And I am being very critical but not to be cruel but because what you have up to there is freaking AMAZING and perfect!

The second point is easy to correct. When you get to the last chorus and sing finally free, the melody has to come up instead of staying in the low register that the other choruses go to. This is the spot where you drive the whole thing home and you need to come up an octave and belt it out. It needs that WOW factor at the end and you'll have a hit record here.

Again, please don't take any of this as negative, for you have some great writing chops and recording chops to boot. I don't usually offer opinions like this, but you have something so good I just had to say what I thought. This is really excellent work--it just needs the right finish and its unstoppable.
 
Participant - Thanks for listening! On the 'level' did you mean the vocal, or overall the mix needs more level? The drums I wouldn't mind having done live, but I'm not quite set up for that yet. My drummer is buying a house this month with a room where we can set his drums permanently, and I'll probably try to track them over there. For now, free programmed drums fit the bill to get the idea going...but I always love live drums. Yes, I know that dumb click is still in there...I need to re-export and find out where it's bleeding! I appreciate your encouarging comments...thanks!

Lt. Bob - thanks man, means a lot to me! I too would like to bring that organ up a bit, and maybe even have it 'go off' just a little more at the outro. I'm glad you dug the song, it's only my second song I've ever written. Thanks for listening.

Crawdad - Thanks for the compliments! I always worry a little about my voice because I'm hypersensitive to bad pitch, and I know I have my own pitch issues, so it makes me a little nervous when I put it down on a vocal. I've jotted down all your lyrical notes in my notebook for this song to consider when I go to retool it. I'll have to see about that next octave up, I seem to have lost some of my schoolboy tenor range in my older age! I do appreciate you taking the time to offer constructive criticism though....and I'm devloping a thicker skin as the days go by. I'm still learning the craft of writing, so I feel I can learn from every critique. Thanks again!

Paul
 
If you can't do the octave, just rework the title line at the end so you are up whatever you can do, provided it works--a fifth or whatever. Again, its a great song!
 
Beautiful!!!!!!!!

Excellent song, recording, vocals.............liked it all. I agree, I would like to hear that organ kick it in a little here and there, especially at the end to give it some punch. I also agree that you should try to end strong with your vocals. Great songwriting. Simple and yet incredibly effective.



two thumbs up
Brian
 
Apologies

Hey, I must say, I downloaded it and played it off of my hard drive and the organ and keys come out much better. The stream was killing it I guess. Pretty much ignore me then, you are so way ahead of me. I would be SUPER PROUD of that there song.


Thanks for sharing

Brian:)
 
Hey - Pretty nice pop song. Kinda of Train meets Counting Crows meets David Gray. All good artist.

GOOD JOB BUDDY, SOUNDS LIKE YOU PUT SOME WORK INTO IT.

WINSTON
 
Sounds better than most of the country songs I hear. I like the organ. It really helps to fill out the song. Great idea SixStringBlues!

Good song writing for sure. Keep it up, and try to get your name out there. You might just find yourself playing in a stadium rather than a bar someday.

Thats about as good a compliment as I can give. Oh yeah, nice production above all. Everything sits well in the mix.

Ok one suggestion though. Those tom sounds aren't the best I have ever heard. Maybe find some better ones. Not a big deal though I have heard worse. Great idea SixStringBlues!

Around 2:30 I hear a really thin section as far as the drums go. The fills are nice and full on the previous 2. But for some reason this last one is just a china or strange cymbal sound with no bass drum at the same time. Picky I know, but it would help.

Good Work
Beezoboy
 
Hey, I liked the song. Well recorded and especially well sung.

I like some of the suggestions you got from others. I would definitely put harmonies into the chorus. Even if they're only "ahh's" that follow the chord progression, it would greatly enhance things. But I think that harmonies that follow the melody line would be better.

Yeah that last chorus should really bust out - don't pull back. You've got the voice to nail it, so nail it. Maybe modulate it a full step?

How about a little guitar riff coming out of the chorus? Even if it only plays the chords higher on the neck, it might enhance the transition back to the verse a little better.

Good job.
 
Very impressed here. I've been kinda' busy this week, so I'm glad I didn't miss this. The recording, the writing, THE VOICE!! It's all good, man. Yeah, this one's in the download department for sure.

I saw somebody make a comment about this being "country," and others call it "pop." That line's pretty thin these days, but I can definitely hear this going either way. (That's a good thing, as I'm sure you know). The tune itself kinda' reminds me of something Mark McGuinn might have written ("Mrs. Steven Rudy," etc.). Love him or hate him, the boy's got talent.

Second song, eh? Sheesh...I think my second song was about my bicycle. I mean, sure...it was GREAT, but not quite in the same league as this. :D

Oh yeah, the "Crawdad" guy...he's actually written hits, so I'd take it to heart.
 
Crawdad - As soon as I get over my little cold/cough thingy here, I'll try a couple different ideas musically with that part. Again, I appreciate the input and am taking good notes with the suggestions.

SSB - Thanks man, I appreciate the listen and the postive words! I must say that I've read almost everything I could here for about two years, really trying to implement everything I could that applied to me. Any recording quality success I've had, is mostly due to the information I gathered here. I'd still like a little more action in the keys at the end, but I'm glad you could hear them more on the download. I'm not a big fan of streaming, but some people don't want to have to do a full download, so I make it available.

WP - Thanks! I like all those guys. My style seems to fall in between a newer acoustic driven country sound and a lot of guitar driven pop/rock artists like you mention. I'm also really into John Mayer, who is also acoustically driven, most of the time. Thanks for listening!

Beezo - Thanks, I'll have to take a listen at that spot and see what's up. The drum programming was all done by my buddy, and I just kind of gave him control. I told him I wanted a little 'loopy' type sound at the beginning before the drums kick in, like Keith Urban or Gary Allen have been using, but really gave him full control to do whatever he thought sounded best. My ultimate desire is to have my drummer track them, but I'm just not set up to get a good sound that way yet...but someday!

TripleM - Good suggestions! I may add another simple guitar part with some of the stuff going on. I'm not the greatest harmony singer, but have played around with some stuff. The keyboard player I use sometimes has an amazing knack for harmonys, and I've talked about having him come in. It's been fun and crazy to watch this song take off from my original acoustic version to more of a fully produced song. (you can go to www.buzzsawmusic.com and listen to the original version on the Music page. it's neat how it's still so much like my original guitar/vocal version, but still different).

Scott - they are some sampled kits of some sort. He programmed them up in Logic with his gear there. If I can find out some more specifics about them, I'll let you know, although it's entirely possible that he sampled them himself off of a drummers kit.

Chris - Hey, thanks a lot! I agree, that line has gotten thinner these days. Look at Shania's latest, she released both a country and pop version of her album, and you get both when you buy it. In most cases, it's just changing out an instrument or two that make the song one way or the other. Mark McGuinn is cool, and it's funny, I've actually had a couple people make a similar comparison, and I agree he's got some talent.....so that's a good compliment! And you're right, I'm taking Crawdads suggestions to heart. As a new writer, I can't afford to not take the input of a more seasoned writer....I always say I can learn from any critique or input session.

Thanks again for listening!

Paul
 
Back
Top