Stuff I Saw on TV

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TripleM

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I got a new one done. I would appreciate any and all comments on writing, recording, production and musicianship.

The song is "Stuff I Saw on TV" and the URL is here

http://www.nowhereradio.com/artists/?aid=1436/singles

Thanks.

Sab - I think I've got to most of your stuff and I hope you can give a listen and critique. But it's probably not dark enough for you. :D
 
Hey,

I was listening with the volume up for the first minute or so and I thought that the snare was very harsh and invading. I liked the vocals cadance and arrangment of the verses but I couldn't understand anything. I lowered my volume by half and I could understand the lyrics but still heard a harshness.

Very cleaver writting and vocal phrazing;). The bass was rockin' all along. I think the mix is good and that all potential probs are on my end. I don't trust my ear enough to do more than tell ya what I heard.

Sounds like this one is fun to push out!!

Peace,

Theron.
 
I'm gonna try something for a change.

what do YOU hear with this that is wrong?

to me there is some obvious stuff, and I'd be interested if you are hearing the same problems.

Does this compare to a commercially released CD? ....if that is important..presuming you want comparable quality. If not, what are the differences?
 
Writing: Excellent. Words and music fit together nicely. I dug the line about Michael Stipe, the way it tied in with the tv theme ("Mikey likes it.") Music had a very cool punk feel to it. I know some don't like comparisons, but this reminded me of something The Clash would do.

Recording: I agree with Theron's assessment. The snare sound put me off a bit. I do like the energy of the piece a lot.

Production: If you mean the presentation of the song, I like the way it's presented. The words should be a little hard to understand in this genre in my opinion. The guitars should sound just like they do. Actually, I'm not real clear on what a producer does, anyway. :D

Musicianship: The only real problem I hear in this area is a timing issue between guitars and drums, mainly toward the end of the piece. Sounds like things aren't quite in sync.

Overall: Thumbs up...I dig the song. Being a writer and rhythm player, those are the two aspects that grab my attention immediately in any song. I love the writing, have a slight problem with the rhythm, as mentioned above.

Good song!

Mark
 
Marsha Marsha Marsha LMAO!-You're obviously a good songwriter-the progressions and melodies work real well. As far as the mix-the drums are hurtin me!! Man a rockin drum part would transform this song! Like a Kieth Moon or like a rockin Jam song this would sound sooooo good with a powerful drum part. The drums seem to totally lose it around 1:55----Again I think the vocal melody and the chord structure is excellent-very rockin.


Strat
 
Nice little tune with a hook but the production is very low fi.It has no ass.What are you using for drums?The snare sounds like a cap pistol.The drums are probably the weakest link in this song.

Are the guitars out of tune a little bit?They sound out of tune just a little bit.

You are a good writer.I checked out My Friend Ben awhile back when it was on the front page of Nowhere and thought it was a cleverly written song in the same vein as this tune.
 
From what i could tell, I liked the song. Most of the lyrics were unintelligible, which was very unfortunate, because I caught a few and there is something great brewing there.

I thought everything sounded like it was miced from 8 feet away.

The song is catchy and probably very intelligent lyrically. I just couldn't hear the lyrics and I felt the recording didn't do the song justice. I agree with the previous comments on the mix.

Overall impression: a very talented artist/songwriter with a demo that doesn't do put the artist in the best light possible.
 
Theron - thanks for the advice and help. Getting the words sung in a manner that can be understood was difficult. There are a lot of words crammed into a tight space. I had to punch in a lot of them because I couldn't hold enough air in my lungs to get them all out. - that's how I got the cadence. It wasn't intentional, but I liked it so I kept it that way.

mkg - I played around a lot with the snare. I like a snappy sound to the snare, but maybe I overdid it here. Thanks for the other comments too. Oh and the "be like Mike" was a reference to the Michael Jordan Gatorade commercials a few year back. But whatever works for you is fine :D

Stratomaster - I've been writing longer than mixing and it shows.

Kramer - I was surprised by the lo-fi comment. Is that just due to the drums or other things as well. As far as tuning - I don't think they were out. There's a goofy progression that goes from Em to E - but it's supposed to be that way. That might be what you heard.

Lastly mixmkr.
What do I hear? I knew I was pushing things with the snare - I like them to snap. I was playing around with lots of different sounds, so I think that's pretty easy to fix.

Beyond that, I didn't like the tone on the "main" rhythm guitar part. I was having problems with harshness. It seemed to either sound too harsh or sound like the mic was 8 feet away. I hit the best balance I could.

I couldn't get the blend on the harmonies that I wanted, and they didn't come out in the mix. I swear I tried, but I couldn't get it to sound like I wanted.

I had trouble deciding how far to bring out the vocals. I put them back just a bit, but I don't know if that was the right decision.

So what were some of the obvious things you heard? And yes, commercial CD quality is something I'd like to work toward.
 
"...it's the end of the world as we know it...." :D

this is cool tune but there is a tonn of probl with sound, specialy if you going quality, I think that's why mixmkr was hasitant to begin his assesment ... where should I being??? :) I would say on the big scale either you overdid it with EQ or the sorce sound is bad and you were trying to polish a turd. :D

I think the easiest thing to do is to go back to the basics like crawdad suggested in the other thread (forgot which one). Start with just a guitar and vocal and find sound that you like for that and build on that.

One thing I tried resently was make a scratch guitar track to a click. then i put it in acid 2.0 (it's realy cheap .. got it free but you can get it with acid latin for like $10) then make drums in it. Makes it much easier to follow the intended flow of the song then with the drum machine but harder to swap the sounds.

This is a fast song and very rythmic so the rithm is very important.
listen closely to the coda, see how drum machine just plows along like eeeeh.. machine but the guitar has this cool "swinging" feel and they clash.

another thing your mixdown might be clipping as it seems destorted.

on more listens the sound reminds me a little of a sound of "hard days night" album which is cool

man! how can you say so many words in so little time.. :D lol

cheers
 
Thank you for the listen Fed.

I don't understand why EQing is so difficult for me. But it is. I certainly need help.
 
TV watchin

Hello there. I'm new to the site but, at someone named Sabbath's prodding, I have risen to the challenge of listening to and commenting on some of the mp3 mix suggestions.

I heard Stuff I Saw on TV and agree with most of the thread. You've got a good catchy upbeat tune that needs some attention in the percussion department. The end makes it seem like you gave up a little just to get it finished. If that is indeed the case, then I am right there with ya. These projects always seem fun until it's five am and you realize you need to re-record a click track at a different bpm halfway through a song and redo the rest after that.

I think I agree with FED's comment about creating a scratch guitar to a click track, then laying down your "real drums" via Acid, Fruity Loops (which I'm trying to use) or a regular old drum machine.... It's time consuming but, so far for me, full proof from having to scrap an entire project.

good effort.

milesmaxwell
 
I think EQ'ing gets more dificult as you have more instruments playing but for the basic drums/bass/2 gtr/vocal it's not too bad.

you should post it without any eq/processing and see what comments you get. I think they call it "faders up" mix. jsut pann stuff and set levels to taste and that's it. I tried it and saw others (like Harvey :)) recomend it for a good start.

cheers
 
Thank you Miles...

Hey a P.S. to mixmkr... A big reason the song is EQ'd the way it is was because of a comment you made on my last song. You had said it's "a bit midrangy." I cut a ton of mids out of this mix.
 
TripleM said:
Kramer - I was surprised by the lo-fi comment. Is that just due to the drums or other things as well. As far as tuning - I don't think they were out. There's a goofy progression that goes from Em to E - but it's supposed to be that way. That might be what you heard..

I'll listen again.That could have been the reason for what I thought was out of tune.

The low-fi thing hits immediately because of the drums.What are you using for drums?The snare pops just a like a cap pistol.It doesnt have any body to it.Drum Machine?
 
Kramer - I appreaciate the thoughtful comments and your time.

The drums are a midi track. I played around with the EQ of the snare and got a wide range of sounds to it. I like a snare with a lot of snap. In listening again, I still like it. But it seems like I'm the only one. :D So I definitely think I could get a substantial change to the sound to get rid of the cap pistol effect.

Again - thanks.
 
The left & right guitars sound too much like they're played in some room. The whole song gets too noisy. There must be too much overlapping mids here. The snare sounds slappy, and has no real power to it. It lacks some mids, maybe more low mids. The singing sounds very Beatles-like, which isn't very original.

I hope this all isn't pissing you off. The song itself isn't that bad. In fact, it sounds like a decent pop song. It's just the mixing that distracts me.
 
stuff i saw in this post

is much better than anything i could give you.

very fun, busy song! tough one to sing!!!

thank's for sharing this one man!!

peace

rick
 
Fed said:
"...it's the end of the world as we know it...." :D

man that is EXACTLY what i was thinking through the 1 st verse.but once the chorus started it dissapated..lol..i really like the "cadence"...of the verse as well.."buy a hous ewith no money down"..i dont know why this stuck out to me but i thought it was funny as shit....and then we get to the snare....it sounds like yer slappin yer ass...or maybe crackin a whip!...but that is really a small consideration and easily fixed great job on the lyrics(what i could make out)....that was probobly the strongest aspect of this song to me...well really any song..i guess..

jamal
 
TripleM said:

Sab - I think I've got to most of your stuff and I hope you can give a listen and critique. But it's probably not dark enough for you. :D


good one! :D Yeah you've usually always hooked me up.. I see you commenting on many tunes here too.. You are on the cool list..:)



Now allow me to rip your tune apart. :eek:






I didnt read any comments yet..

Cool tune..Reminds me of some old skool punk bands..
I dont like the snare.. Are there some harmonys buried some where? I almost hear a harmony.. I really don't like the drums, but I have definitely heard worse drum sounds here.. I'm being real picky because nothing JUMPS OUT as being completely wrong with the mix, and the song is cool.. On second listen, those harmonys are borderline but regular people wouldn't notice.. :) "Everybody wants to be like Mike" that's a cool line.. I will now steal it! :eek:





:D (joke)

The guitars sound slightly out of intonation.. It also sounds like it might be heavily compressed.. not to death, but still almost too much maybe.. I'm almost hearing distortion..It also sounds like it might need some more bass.. or low end.. or bass drum.. and it sounds like there is too much mid-range for my personal tastes..I don't like that harsh sounding snare... it blends a bit later, but I don't like it..


I'm being critical, but like I said, it would sound great to the average person I'm sure.. Now I will read the other comments and make sure that everyone said the opposite! :D

cool overall..



sam
 
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