start us a fire

  • Thread starter Thread starter Nicole_Rose
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Nicole_Rose

Nicole_Rose

Great White North Girl
old lyrics to an old song that's already been recorded. co wrote with a friend.

any good?

verse 1

There comes a time, in every life
you’ve got to fill your desire,
so step right up, and come on in
we’re gonna start us a fire

chorus

Start us a fire burning out of control
fuel it with love and baby just let it grow
the flames of desire have a beautiful glow
let’s start a fire burning out of control

verse 2

take my hand, and hold on tight
let’s ride the stars up above us
by the time we reach, the morning light
there won’t be nothing to stop us

chorus
 
Good Song Nicole Rose......

There comes a time, in every life
you’ve got to fill your desire,
so step right up, and come on in
we’re gonna start us a fire

If this is a slow tempo song Line 3 in the first verse (in bold above) seems a little out of context for a love song. It sounds like something a salesman (for example) would say to invite someone in. Kind of non-personal. However, if it is a fast, uptempo song, the phrase fits, as it brings a sense of light-heartedness to the song. So to me it depends on the tempo....
Other than that everything flows smoothly and tells a good story.....
 
Nicole_Rose said:
old lyrics to an old song that's already been recorded. co wrote with a friend.

any good?

verse 1

There comes a time, in every life
you’ve got to fill your desire,
so step right up, and come on in
we’re gonna start us a fire

chorus

Start us a fire burning out of control
fuel it with love and baby just let it grow
the flames of desire have a beautiful glow
let’s start a fire burning out of control

verse 2

take my hand, and hold on tight
let’s ride the stars up above us
by the time we reach, the morning light
there won’t be nothing to stop us

chorus
Click to expand...

I like the flow but I do get a little wary as I think fire/desire are very common rhymes.

I am not sure about the word "control" in the chorus.

Howabout
Start us a fire and get it burning
fuel it with love and baby just let it grow
the flames of desire feed our yearning
he flames of desire have a beautiful glow


or something! It is so hard to tell without the music and listening to the singer. Can we hear it?
 
those words look awkward, but they dont' sound awkward, not much anyway. the flow is good.

i can't post the song to mysoundclick because i'm not the only one who has rights to it. if you pm me your email addy's i can email you each a copy if you like.
 
Nicole_Rose said:
those words look awkward, but they dont' sound awkward, not much anyway. the flow is good.

i can't post the song to mysoundclick because i'm not the only one who has rights to it. if you pm me your email addy's i can email you each a copy if you like.
Click to expand...
PM sent...... :D
 
Nicole_Rose said:
the song can now be found at

http://www.lightningmp3.com/live/file.php?fid=5213

it was recorded badly, you'll have to play with your eq a bit. it was the first song we recorded.
Click to expand...
Just listened to it....it is an up-tempo song so the line I mentioned fits with no problem. It has a familiar feel to it (pop/radio rock) and also has a catchy uniqueness that makes it your own style. It could use a remix to pull up the instruments but that would depend if you have the origianl tracks still.
Good Song Nicole Rose!

:) :D :) :D
 
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