Somebody Lyrics w/ MP3

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cmiller3116

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Let me know what you think. The MP3 (of just the music) is attached here: View attachment Somebody.mp3


Somebody

Verse 1:
Save your 99 cent birthday cards
you’re 20 years too late.
Having Jesus on the front of them
won’t change my hate-red. My
Uncle took the role you should’ve filled
but, now he’s gone, I’ve lost my will.
And as I stood there all alone with
tears in my eyes, I thought
You should be the one who dies.

Chorus:
You don’t know me and I don’t want to know you.
You must think this whole world’s about you.
You’ve had too many chances already.
You’ve made me feel like I was nobody.
But I’m somebody.
Somebody…
you’ll never know.

Verse 2:
How did I end up so lucky
and get a father like you?
A liar and manipulator,
wife-beater, too
Thinking of you makes me want to douse your house
in gasoline, light a match, watch it burn.
If you think your stupid fucking Jesus cards
will absolve your sins
You’ve got a lot to learn.

Bridge:
(Be)cause you won’t get a thing from me
as long as I’m alive.
Though I was a kid,
I’m still trying to survive. And..

Chorus

Bridge

Chorus (2):
I hope one day you hear this song and it kills you
Maybe then you can finally admit you’ve
Had too many chances already
I hope it makes you feel like you’re nobody
Cause you’re nobody
You’re nobody I want to know.
 
I think you have potential with this, I like a lot of what you are doing with your left hand by way of shifting the structure of the chord you are creating the melody with. It gets a bit like the piano at the end of Clapton's "Layla" and maybe a tad too close for anyone who has played that track a few times.
I could easily image some of the lyrics over the music. Without actually engaging fully which I don't have time for right now, and actually singing the lyrics myself, it's open to the execution to see to what extent you have to horn the lines to have it cohere. The vocabulary is sufficient to outline the narative without removing the interpreation or jarring the lstener. The lines are not groundbreaking, but the familiarity of the sentiment and what you do with vocal could yield pleasant results. I'll reserve \ny ideas for amending the lines until such time as I hear them in the full context.

Regards

Tim
 
Some good ideas. Phrase maker is right about the change - It's essentially the hymnal part of Layla.
I’ve lost my will. The will to what? this is unclear.
(Be)cause you won’t get a thing from me
except this song,
And I'll only sing it once,
Before it's gone.
With you.
I can hear this in my head as an Evenescence type of track that moves from solo piano soot voce to full on pop metal.
 
We don't get enough piano tunes here - nice to hear one for a change. Good piano playing like this is just an added plus....
I can identify with your lyrics - different person but same idea. If this is personal, I think it takes a lot to share this and it's kind of a therapy.
I give two thumbs up for this one.
 
Is this going to be piano/vocal? or are there plans for a whole band? Drums, Bass & Guitar?

This could be a great rock song.

It does sound reminiscent of Layla, and While My Guitar Gently Weeps in places. But that is not necessarily a bad thing.
 
Good lyrics man, it might be hard to fit though so I would keep the same idea and summarize it a bit. I would take out "I lost my will" The idea is pretty concrete throughout though.
 
ido1957: thank you very much. You're the demographic I'm shooting for here. It's not for everyone, but there are definitely a large amount of people who can put themselves in my shoes and relate, even with the circumstances being slightly, or even extremely different. So, I'm glad you like it and thanks again.

fuzzsniffvoyage: As of right now, no. I don't know anyone who plays the drums and the loops in logic pro 9... idk... they are great, but can't do the same thing a human can, you know? I wouldn't mind the idea of it turning into a heavier, more rock song-ish track. I could do it with my guitar, but, I kind of like it stripped down. I do want to add more layers, though. If you have any suggestions, I'd really appreciate it. Thank you again, and I'm glad you like it!

blacklist: I agree, it's pretty much conveyed throughout the song that I've lost my will here (Ray, this kind of links to yours as well). I've lost my will in humanity, my will to feel happiness, my will to ever reconcile with this man. I think it's pretty apparent throughout. So, yea, I'm going to change it. I'm not sure to what yet. Any suggestions? It sounds lame, but I’m thinking, "he was so ill". He died of cancer. So, it kind of also would explain why I was standing there alone, crying thinking my father should have died. Thoughts?

Phasemaker: Thank you! And, I don't believe I've heard Layla... I may have if it was a hit. But I definitely don't want to know, especially if it already sounds a bit like it. I don't want it to influence where I go with it.

As always, thanks guys! I'm opening up a lot... Ray, you were right, sometimes being so personal to me makes me unwilling to make changes, but I'm opening up. I had to get over that. And I am. Thanks again.

Chris
 
really like the track..reading the lyric I was waiting for the music to get angry. know what I mean? good work.
 
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