Richard King
New member
I like it. Can't complain at all about the mix or the sound. Nice song. It has sort of a Bread feel to it (that is some of the BETTER Bread songs).
Obi-Wan zenabI
Active member
Killer. I do like leaving the resolving note off the bass. That drumming is so killer--when Windows Media kicked the song back to the top to replay, the drums kind of came back in, which gave me two ideas for the end.
1. have the song come back in on that /great/ hook-y intro and fade on repeats of it.
2. Have the drummer play a unison figure with the bassline at the end-- which would kind of tie all that excellent drumming in with that lone bass and sort of drive that last bar-- you know, with one of those grabbed-cymbal moves...? Would add a lot of power to the song.
1. have the song come back in on that /great/ hook-y intro and fade on repeats of it.
2. Have the drummer play a unison figure with the bassline at the end-- which would kind of tie all that excellent drumming in with that lone bass and sort of drive that last bar-- you know, with one of those grabbed-cymbal moves...? Would add a lot of power to the song.
CIRO
Eu mesmo
RAMI!
Sounds excellent.I read something about you moved to a new house/studio and this song sounds very clean and punchy, even better than your old recordings.
Drums sounds excellent.Greg Talked about a boomy BD, but what I hear is a loud bass drum (around 50HZ) but without any boominess.Excellent interaction between it and the bass guitar (excellent too)
Guitars sounds cleaner than your previous recordings and sounds beautifull, but IMO the stereo effect could be more defined, to make the vox appears better (maybe a little cut on ~1,5/3k on guitars could help).Guitars are working very well with bass/drums, but makes the vocal a little thin and "hidden". 1 or 2 dbs on vocals could be great (at least is my impression)
Guitar on b part, right channel have lots of bass and In my opinion is not helping the arrangement , but, you know, is my very personal taste.
Ciro
Sounds excellent.I read something about you moved to a new house/studio and this song sounds very clean and punchy, even better than your old recordings.
Drums sounds excellent.Greg Talked about a boomy BD, but what I hear is a loud bass drum (around 50HZ) but without any boominess.Excellent interaction between it and the bass guitar (excellent too)
Guitars sounds cleaner than your previous recordings and sounds beautifull, but IMO the stereo effect could be more defined, to make the vox appears better (maybe a little cut on ~1,5/3k on guitars could help).Guitars are working very well with bass/drums, but makes the vocal a little thin and "hidden". 1 or 2 dbs on vocals could be great (at least is my impression)
Guitar on b part, right channel have lots of bass and In my opinion is not helping the arrangement , but, you know, is my very personal taste.
Ciro
R
RAMI
Guest
I think the kick/snare could be louder.
Very cool chorus, dude - especially the guitar sounds.
I think a few more layers of rhythm guitar tracks during the verses would give it a little more depth. But that's just my tendency.
Maybe following the bass part at the very end with your snare would give the song more of a "period" at the end instead of a "comma", if you know what I mean. Although, it works well when you've got the media player on loop.
Hehe...Maybe I should just put a disclaimer saying "This song sounds best when on REPEAT".
Thanx alot for the listen, Super. I'm often tempted to layer more (especially guitars). But I still have the mind-set, when I record, that my songs are being played by a 4 piece band with 2 guitars. So I never have more than 2 guitar parts going at the same time. It's just something I loosely stick to that helps me not over-produce. Or else, I can go forever and never finish a song.
R
RAMI
Guest
Another great tune, I like this.
I really like the abrupt ending, it's unexpected but seems to fit (for me). It's kinda like: "Who's gonna save you? NOBODY. Bye.
Thanx alot, Mr. Thompson. I'm still debating myself about that ending. I don't think it would ruin the song either way. But a few people came up with some great ideas for the ending in this thread, so I have to experiment.
R
RAMI
Guest
Thanx alot, Richard King. I love BREAD but only knew of their very mellow stuff. I guess I have to check into some of their BETTER stuff.
R
RAMI
Guest
Killer. I do like leaving the resolving note off the bass. That drumming is so killer--when Windows Media kicked the song back to the top to replay, the drums kind of came back in, which gave me two ideas for the end.
1. have the song come back in on that /great/ hook-y intro and fade on repeats of it.
2. Have the drummer play a unison figure with the bassline at the end-- which would kind of tie all that excellent drumming in with that lone bass and sort of drive that last bar-- you know, with one of those grabbed-cymbal moves...? Would add a lot of power to the song.
Hey, OBI. These are 2 of the great ideas I was referring to earlier. I love both of them. I have already done the "come back to the intro and fade out" with another of my tunes and it worked well.
And I actually tried some choked cymbal stuff on that bass riff, but didn't try it for the ending. I just tried it for the parts going into the chorus and it didn't work. But, for the ending, it just might be the right thing.
Thanx alot for the input, I really appreciate it.
R
RAMI
Guest
Hey CIRO. I moved into the house a few months ago, so this isn't the first tune you've heard me do from here. But I have learned alot about the room and what works for me since moving here.RAMI!
Sounds excellent.I read something about you moved to a new house/studio and this song sounds very clean and punchy, even better than your old recordings.
Drums sounds excellent.Greg Talked about a boomy BD, but what I hear is a loud bass drum (around 50HZ) but without any boominess.Excellent interaction between it and the bass guitar (excellent too)
Guitars sounds cleaner than your previous recordings and sounds beautifull, but IMO the stereo effect could be more defined, to make the vox appears better (maybe a little cut on ~1,5/3k on guitars could help).Guitars are working very well with bass/drums, but makes the vocal a little thin and "hidden". 1 or 2 dbs on vocals could be great (at least is my impression)
Guitar on b part, right channel have lots of bass and In my opinion is not helping the arrangement , but, you know, is my very personal taste.
Ciro
I'm not sure how to get the stereo effect of that rythm guitar more defined. I have them totally hard panned, which I usually DON'T do. I was actually going to narrow them a bit thinking I panned them too far apart.
I think any issue with the vocals not standing out or sitting right has more to do with the vocal track. I still haven't put my finger on it, but the vocals in the verses just don't feel right. I'm working on changing a few lyrics I don't like. And I'm not crazy about the actual performance itself. I like the chosuses, but the verses need work.
Thanx alot for the advice, CIRO.
Last edited:
G
g0dmoney
New member
bad ass song and mix, bring up the snare a little is my humble opinion.
mwthompson
Croisaandwich
Thanx alot, Mr. Thompson. I'm still debating myself about that ending. I don't think it would ruin the song either way. But a few people came up with some great ideas for the ending in this thread, so I have to experiment.
I look forward to hearing what you come up with.
CIRO
Eu mesmo
Rami, let me come back (my opinion) about the stereo on guitars...I listened your song last night, with fatigued ears
Opening the track today, new ears, no beers
and I could see that´s nothing wrong with stereo pan, and vox really has the place on mix.Really excellent mix, I´m comparing with a lot of other songs and sounds pretty good.Ciro
Richard King
New member
I have been working on rebuilding a hurrincane house here that I bought a while back. Today, as I was installing wiring, the line "who's gonna save ya, who's gonna save ya, who's gonna save ya now" has been stuck in my brain all day. Great hook. The earlier Bread reference was the first thing that popped into my mind when I first listened. I think the vocals "sort of" reminded me of the song "Let Your Love Go".
Obi-Wan zenabI
Active member
Hey, OBI. These are 2 of the great ideas I was referring to earlier. I love both of them. I have already done the "come back to the intro and fade out" with another of my tunes and it worked well.
And I actually tried some choked cymbal stuff on that bass riff, but didn't try it for the ending. I just tried it for the parts going into the chorus and it didn't work. But, for the ending, it just might be the right thing.
Thanx alot for the input, I really appreciate it.
Cool, man. And thanks-- inspiring work you have here! Time for me to start searching for your other recordings. I've been away from HR too long.
7string
Well-known member
Yeah, right... and my Mother is a '53 Mustang... come clean with the REAL dirt or you'll never see your drumset alive again!!!!! Oh... wait... I'm supposed to kidnap the drums FIRST... and THEN make the threat...
NEVERMIND!
R
RAMI
Guest
You know....None of us are going to become millionaires from this. But a comment like that IS the reason I record my music. I can't tell you how good it feels to read something like that. Thanx, man.
Obi-Wan zenabI
Active member
Listened again here in the morning, still on laptop speakers. You mentioned working on vocals.
The third verse vocals are great. Excellent build up throughout the song-- so many of things my band does seem to show all the good cards at the top of the tune and peter out at the end... The fugue-like echoes in the last chorus are just awesome.
What I'm hearing in the vox on verse 1 and 2 is a little bit of tuning and support issues-- going a little flat in spots. (I sing in my church choir and my wife is an opera singer, so I'm picky) The last verse goes higher, so it's supported enough to be nicely in tune.
Here's my idea-- what about recording a bunch of takes on the vocals and doubling them on the verses. I think it would mask some of the tuning with the resultant chorusing effect. Might add that voice-of-God power that is referenced in the chorus, too.
I like the thought provoking and theologically challenging lyrics. Good tune all around. It had me thinking about 9/11/01, patriotism and the Christian right, and then finally Christian theology that transcends politics. Good stuff.
Are these lyrics meant to be directed on one level to the United States itself?
The third verse vocals are great. Excellent build up throughout the song-- so many of things my band does seem to show all the good cards at the top of the tune and peter out at the end... The fugue-like echoes in the last chorus are just awesome.
What I'm hearing in the vox on verse 1 and 2 is a little bit of tuning and support issues-- going a little flat in spots. (I sing in my church choir and my wife is an opera singer, so I'm picky) The last verse goes higher, so it's supported enough to be nicely in tune.
Here's my idea-- what about recording a bunch of takes on the vocals and doubling them on the verses. I think it would mask some of the tuning with the resultant chorusing effect. Might add that voice-of-God power that is referenced in the chorus, too.
I like the thought provoking and theologically challenging lyrics. Good tune all around. It had me thinking about 9/11/01, patriotism and the Christian right, and then finally Christian theology that transcends politics. Good stuff.
Are these lyrics meant to be directed on one level to the United States itself?
R
RAMI
Guest
OBI, my songs are rarely pointed at one particular thing. They're usually vague but might suggest something. So, while of course the U.S. of A might have crossed my mind while writing this...
....It's more universal, I guess. Things the Government might be doing now are things that all governments have done, so I can't say it's an anti-American song as much as it might be a statement about history and human nature. And even then, I'm over-thinking it. I'm happy just to find words that rhyme. As far as the vocals in the verse, you're 100% right. There are pitch and "character" issues. I've since re-done the verses with a different idea. I'll be posting it later on. And we both agree on the third verse, it was the only one I kept.
I really appreciate your ears and your input.
Last edited:
R
RAMI
Guest
Just put up a new version. Took alot of advice from this thread and I thank you all.
I changed the verses a bit. I thought they needed something more spacy/gospel or something. I also got a little more seperation out of the guitars in the chorus.
The one thing I didn't change was the ending. OBI had a couple of great ideas, as did Supercreep and Chili. But in the end, I like the ending just hanging in the air.
Thanx again for all the help on this so far.
I changed the verses a bit. I thought they needed something more spacy/gospel or something. I also got a little more seperation out of the guitars in the chorus.
The one thing I didn't change was the ending. OBI had a couple of great ideas, as did Supercreep and Chili. But in the end, I like the ending just hanging in the air.
Thanx again for all the help on this so far.
Obi-Wan zenabI
Active member
The one thing I didn't change was the ending. OBI had a couple of great ideas, as did Supercreep and Chili. But in the end, I like the ending just hanging in the air.
The ending definitely grew on me!