Rabbit Can Read

Ha! Jessica Rabbit!!! I like it.

I like this type of song. Your voice is clear and you hold a melody perfectly. Nice tempo changes.

I like it. The only thing I don't like is the drum machine and claps, etc....It really sends it into 1983 territory. It's a cool, quirky tune, though.
 
Yeah, I'm not super fond of the instrumentation (particularly the percussion) I guess, but that's entirely subjective, so I probably shouldn't even mention it. Sorry. :)

It sounds like you've mixed what you have quite well though. Pretty full and clear sounding. Awfully quiet at this stage and maybe just a little boomy when I turn it up louder in phones?

I do really like the parts where you add more effects to your vocals and layer your voice. There's a cool, warbly thing going on there. What effects did you use if you recall?

Is there autotune or something on the verses? The vocal is clear, but it has a strange quality to it that I can't pinpoint.
 
Nice tune, nice arrangement, nice singing. But you'd be light years further on with better-sounding percussion samples. They sound cheap, like you haven't gone to the same trouble with percussion that you've gone to with the rest of the song. During the bridge 'happiness is a warm heart', I think you need to re-EQ it bit to make it sound less murky.
 
Awesome track!

The instrumentation has some problems for me. That handclap, for example, and the keyboard sound at the start.

When the first change comes around at about 50 seconds, the vocal becomes hard to hear, and may need to come up.

Instrumentation towards the end is really good with lots of textures and interest.
 
Heatmiser:
Yes I did tune the verses (actually all of it) with Logic's flex pitch so it may be artifacts from the tuning that you are hearing. There is also an ensemble plug in on the verses.
For the chorus it's actually 7 tracks of vocals. The first one has an amp on it. The other 6 have delay and ensemble. I think two tracks are sung a third up. The last vocal track is pitch shifted down an octave. The group as a whole has a blue plate reverb on it.

Dobro: Huh, most people don't like the percussion. I'll at least look into a different hand clap sample and see if I like it better. I made the bridge sound murky on purpose, with not only lots of reverb but an added amp. I was imagining it in a church. Maybe I need to back off on that. I've gone back and forth on it. Thanks for your comments.

Gecko zzed: More hate for the handclap. Might be something to it. I'll try making the chorus vocals louder and see if it sounds better. I feel like I have a consistent problem in my songs where my choruses sound too different from the verses, and I think the same thing is happening here.

Thanks everyone for your time, I appreciate it.
 
For the chorus it's actually 7 tracks of vocals. The first one has an amp on it. The other 6 have delay and ensemble. I think two tracks are sung a third up. The last vocal track is pitch shifted down an octave. The group as a whole has a blue plate reverb on it.

Interesting. I would not have guessed all of that. It sounds cool, so I think it was worth all the work.
 
Another vote against the annoying handclap on the right side. The during the chorus there's a clap/stick on the left side that echoes towards the right I don't like either. I'd recommend replacing the drum machine with a regular VST or real drummer, it really detracts from what could be a great song.
 
Another vote against the annoying handclap on the right side. The during the chorus there's a clap/stick on the left side that echoes towards the right I don't like either. I'd recommend replacing the drum machine with a regular VST or real drummer, it really detracts from what could be a great song.

I have many ideas that I would approach that are based on this.

But it is not my baby and one persons vision is not necessarily that of another.

I would love to work on some of Jessica's tracks again. I really enjoyed messing around with a couple previously.
 
Thanks Jimmy.

MJB and others:
I used Logic's Ultrabeat (a mix of "Techno 808" and "Electrobump") for the drum sounds.
I'm convinced the clap at least needs to be changed.
What I'm trying to figure out is:
Is it that people don't like techno-sounding drums in general? (in which case too bad)
Or is it that I'm doing it poorly? (this I could try to change)
 
Dobro: Huh, most people don't like the percussion. I'll at least look into a different hand clap sample and see if I like it better. I made the bridge sound murky on purpose

Yeah, Jessica Rabbit, I understand. I do that all the time.
 
Thanks Jimmy.

MJB and others:
I used Logic's Ultrabeat (a mix of "Techno 808" and "Electrobump") for the drum sounds.
I'm convinced the clap at least needs to be changed.
What I'm trying to figure out is:
Is it that people don't like techno-sounding drums in general? (in which case too bad)
Or is it that I'm doing it poorly? (this I could try to change)

I don't feel there is a general dislike of-techno sounding drums. I do feel that the 'canned' sound of them is very generic if something isn't done to make it unique.

I really like everything you have created. Just keep doing that. :)
 
It sort of reminds me of the old pac man album lol. I think it's cool and all, but could be better. I can really hear the movement of your lips sometimes. Like if you're too close to the mic or something. I think the biggest problem is the fake sounding stuff. Maybe try getting some better synth drums and experiment :thumbs up:
 
Vocals sounded pretty good.

I thought the tempo in the verses was a couple of bpm's too fast. Sounds like an auctioneer at times.

I didn't care for the rhythm starting at about :42 or so. It was distracting.

The synth competes with the vocal during the chorus.
 
It seemed to me that the vocal level was fluctuating gently. I felt like I could really hear you "speak". Maybe I'm so used to compressed vocals.
 
Hey Jessica, this is really cool. I always enjoy hearing your tunes as you write some strong melodies and build in some really quirky stuff into the arrangements and lyrics.

I liked the lo-fi synth sounds and I even thought the handclaps were fine (I quite like those retro 808 sounds), but I think they need to be balanced out by a couple of non-MIDI additions to the mix, and (if possible) some better drum samples. In terms of non-MIDI additions, I was thinking a bass guitar line and some hand percussion would really help ground your mix and take it up a notch. With this kind of more solid foundation, I think you'd free up the mix to use those synth sounds without the kind of critique about the instrumentation in this thread (if that makes sense?). If you don't have access to a bass, but need a line doing then feel free to let me know and I'll see if I can help - or it looks like Jimmy's available too.

I don't know if you're already a fan of Bat for Lashes, but I think her music may be a good reference point to A/B with on this mix? There's a bit of a Lana del Rey feel to that 'Happiness is a warm heart' bit too - I've been trying to place it all morning and it just came to me...

The vocal arrangement throughout is excellent and it's interesting to hear what steps you took to create it. I really like that warped pitch on the chorus, and the rhythmic shift that underpins it gives it a real trippy feel, which makes the song imo.

Good stuff. Hope this helps :)
 
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