Quick Critiques please....

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How to use the CAPSLOCK key.


IMAGE ONE.
The Keyboard.
The more IT literate among you may recognise image one as a keyboard. This article hopes to break down some of the mysteries of the keyboard and allow you to fully appreciate its usage.
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IMAGE TWO.
The Capslock key.
The capslock key serves a useful purpose. If you need to type several capital letters at once, it lets you do this. Simply press once to turn on capitals, and press again to turn them off. Off is important. Usually a light will appear on your keyboard to inform you of the status. If you're not sure which one, if your typing LOOKS LIKE THIS, you really should press it again.
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IMAGE THREE.
The SHIFT key.
If you want only one capital letter, the shift key is what you need. Hold down shift, and without letting go, press the key you want. This also lets you access the funny symbols on the top of some keys.
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CONCLUSION.
Now you know how to use a keyboard, there's NO NEED TO SHOUT, and no need to avoid all punctuation and proper capitalisation. Enjoy your newfound freedom behind the keyboard. Write a novel! Complain to a newspaper! Don't look like a total moron on forums!
 

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And lets not forget the improper use of commas and capitals such as
 

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HangDawg said:
And lets not forget the improper use of commas and capitals such as
Click to expand...

In modern poetry/prose you don't need grammar; dipshit.
 
Just ask Huck Gutman.


My name is Huck Gutman, and I am interested in poetry. I teach at the University of Vermont, and am so fascinated by what poems can do, so entranced by them, that I would like to share my fascination with others. I've developed web pages on which I talk about some of the poets who fascinate me the most, hoping to enable those of you who visit to find an entrance, a broad and sunlit path, into the works of a number of this century's finest poets.
 

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bazzlad said:
How to use the CAPSLOCK key.


IMAGE ONE.
The Keyboard.
The more IT literate among you may recognise image one as a keyboard. This article hopes to break down some of the mysteries of the keyboard and allow you to fully appreciate its usage.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------

IMAGE TWO.
The Capslock key.
The capslock key serves a useful purpose. If you need to type several capital letters at once, it lets you do this. Simply press once to turn on capitals, and press again to turn them off. Off is important. Usually a light will appear on your keyboard to inform you of the status. If you're not sure which one, if your typing LOOKS LIKE THIS, you really should press it again.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------

IMAGE THREE.
The SHIFT key.
If you want only one capital letter, the shift key is what you need. Hold down shift, and without letting go, press the key you want. This also lets you access the funny symbols on the top of some keys.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------

CONCLUSION.
Now you know how to use a keyboard, there's NO NEED TO SHOUT, and no need to avoid all punctuation and proper capitalisation. Enjoy your newfound freedom behind the keyboard. Write a novel! Complain to a newspaper! Don't look like a total moron on forums!
Click to expand...



So you post all this crap and then call me a dipshit and say grammar doesn't matter. You're the fuckin dipshit.
 
HangDawg said:
So you post all this crap and then call me a dipshit and say grammar doesn't matter. You're the fuckin dipshit.
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No you're the dipshit. Look up the word "context". I said it doesn't matter in modern POETRY/PROSE.
 
bazzlad said:
No you're the dipshit. Look up the word "context". I said it doesn't matter in modern POETRY/PROSE.
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Since when does your gay banner qualify as modern POETRY/PROSE fucktard. :rolleyes:
 
Oh, homophobia. The funniest.

"Poetry
A literary expression in which language is used in a concentrated blend of sound and imagery to create an emotional response."

I class the work as Poetry, and thus it is. You can't make it any easier to understand than that.
 
bazzlad said:
In modern poetry/prose you don't need grammar; dipshit.
Click to expand...
Isn't it time that
We came up with something better to do, than ' "
Play Crap grammar WITH mr PreCious here after
All, don't any
Of us have
Lives?
 
noisedude said:
Isn't it time that
We came up with something better to do, than ' "
Play Crap grammar WITH mr PreCious here after
All, don't any
Of us have
Lives?
Click to expand...


You, sir are a fucking genius.
 
noisedude said:
Isn't it time that
We came up with something better to do, than ' "
Play Crap grammar WITH mr PreCious here after
All, don't any
Of us have
Lives?
Click to expand...

Actually quite funny.
I have another.

I thought, that this,
Thread of epic proportions.
Had died. LONG. Ago, yet...
Some pricks, STILL think, they can slag me off; WITHOUT retaliation.
They're obviously delusional.
 
bazzlad said:
Oh, homophobia. The funniest.

"Poetry
A literary expression in which language is used in a concentrated blend of sound and imagery to create an emotional response."

I class the work as Poetry, and thus it is. You can't make it any easier to understand than that.
Click to expand...


You sir, are an idiot.
 
bazzlad said:
It doesn't really hurt me as much when coming from a homophobic adolescent.
Click to expand...


So you consider a 35 year old an adolescent? :rolleyes: And you certainly throw that homophobic word around a lot.
 
You're 35? Nice spelling. Nice maturity. Nice homophobia. I throw it around due to people not seeming to realise calling people GAY isn't funny after the age of 13.
 
Well I'm 36 and I think you need a cup of humility.

Since you're so mature and spell better than the rest of us, why don't you prove it by just not posting anymore.
 
vestast said:
Well I'm 36 and I think you need a cup of humility.

Since you're so mature and spell better than the rest of us, why don't you prove it by just not posting anymore.
Click to expand...

Well you're thick. How does not posting prove my spelling skill?
Dickhead.
 
bazzlad said:
You're 35? Nice spelling. Nice maturity. Nice homophobia. I throw it around due to people not seeming to realise calling people GAY isn't funny after the age of 13.
Click to expand...


Hey asshole, you spelled realize wrong. You stupid fuck. Here's the rest of your spelling errors along with mine.

Mine

Fucktard
fuckin
dipshit

Yours

Alos
Modelling
Recognise
Capitalisation
Realise
pretensious
consise
Everytime

Hmmm, seems you're the dumb fuck eh! And your grammar sucks even worse. Looks like I win, eh douchebag!
 
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