Let me just add really quick that I've never heard someone who isn't a vocalist suggest playing in a key to support a vocalist. Cool, Greg. Novel idea, huh?
Elenore19, I am stoked you wrote a song you are proud of. Don't let what anyone has to say change that at all. You've asked for criticism, and I'm going to lay some on you.
The following is IMO, YMMV etc and
don't take it personally.
As a practical matter, the song could be improved by increasing the overall drum volume and the snare in excess of that, and lowering the overall vocal volume. The bass is going to be replaced and so I'll just leave it out.
The drums have serious timing issues. When you add guitars and bass guitar tracks with additional timing issues each searching for a groove it makes for some really tense and uncomfortable music. Sometimes you can use that to your advantage, and sometimes it works out in an arrangement just because it's a coveted "happy accident".
This is not one of those times. The drummer needs to work with a click track.
Sometimes and only very rarely does sloppy work. Your band is not hardcore enough to do this.
You have good ideas and sound songwriting instincts. Keep following them. Keep playing the bass and piano and keep practicing at all the instruments you can manage. Instruments write their own songs and it's good to have more than a few around. The piano arpeggios in this song would sound better if you had played them better. Practice with a click track so that you can play notes of an even velocity evenly spaced. Remember that your piano can also play quietly. Build it into the song.
My immediate advice is to find some experienced musicians who can help you realize the music in your head. It's good music.
My advice as far as vocals go is to keep at it and eventually you will discover what you can do well.
It may not be what you really want to do. Ignore the desire to sound like you want to sound, and invest in making your voice sound great at what it does well. This should include mic and post processing selection. You have good relative pitch, but your voice needs to mature some more.
Keep up the good work and keep posting for us to listen.
-Casey