I'm with you, Wade. I think the big lesson that most of us have learned is this: whatever monitors we buy, we need to spend many hours (days, weeks) getting to know them before trusting them. I have a dozen reference CDs that I've used at great length to be sure that I understand the quirks of my monitor set-up and room.
Without that time-consuming and tiring step, any mixing results will almost certainly disappoint--even with high-end monitors. On the other hand, even though I've recorded for many years, my current home studio is my fun space. Although I want the best sound I can get from very modest equipment, I'm not looking for the level of quality that a pro would. In a way, that's why it's so fun.
Take care,
J.