I think I'm a singer...will you tell me if you do too? I desperately need to know...

  • Thread starter Thread starter janeparachutes
  • Start date Start date
I knew I would get a remark about my "garbage dump" analogy :p...it deserved one even though that's not what I meant!

I value your advice and agree with it. Like you said, confidence is born from experience, honesty, and pushing your own boundaries. But I think the order there is important. I am still lacking experience, and so I don't want to put myself out there honestly and wholly yet. Anonymity is what makes this feel safe. And sometimes you need a push to convince yourself that what you want is worth working towards. Especially with something creative, like singing or writing, that makes a person so vulnerable and as if they're risking everything, baby steps are sometimes needed to be taken.

How did you develop your confidence in your musical ability? This is really the question I should be asking everyone.... Are you not nervous as hell when you expose your work and yourself to others, or are you and you just do it anyway?

Edited to say also that in regards to my family, words cannot express how frightening it is for me to just imagine singing in front of my uncle, for example, whom I adore but who also outsings me and everyone else I have ever heard. It's intimidating. When I dropped out of my first semester of college (don't worry, I went back), I left on the grounds of my wanting to pursue singing, and the next day he called me not to offer support, but to discourage me from pursuing a career in music. Not because he had heard me sing before, and not because he wanted me to stay in college (his words!), but because of how difficult and stressful the business is.... In his words it's 99% business and 1% creative expression. Often I view my musical family as more discouraging than helpful, oddly enough.
 
Last edited:
janeparachutes said:
I knew I would get a remark about my "garbage dump" analogy :p...it deserved one even though that's not what I meant!

I value your advice and agree with it. Like you said, confidence is born from experience, honesty, and pushing your own boundaries. But I think the order there is important. I am still lacking experience, and so I don't want to put myself out there honestly and wholly yet. Anonymity is what makes this feel safe. And sometimes you need a push to convince yourself that what you want is worth working towards. Especially with something creative, like singing or writing, that makes a person so vulnerable and as if they're risking everything, baby steps are sometimes needed to be taken.

How did you develop your confidence in your musical ability? This is really the question I should be asking everyone.... Are you not nervous as hell when you expose your work and yourself to others, or are you and you just do it anyway?
Click to expand...

LOL! I was just razzing a bit there. :)

A very well felt response and a great question as well. Feeling safe, is definitely the part that one aspires to find. I am not sure however, that that can ever really happen. And one of the beautiful parts of a great performance to me, is seeing a bit of vulnerability in the artist performing.

As far as the last question, I'm not sure how to answer that correctly. I played (with much lack of confidence) since I was 8 years old. After 10 years or so, it just became easy to perform in front of people. That is not to say that I don't still get nervous before a performance. Hell, it wouldn't be any fun it it didn't give you a form of elation and anticipation. I have played in front of 12,000 without blinking an eye, but the small venue gigs seemed to be more nerve racking. There is something that happens once you are well rehearsed, and have the confidence to perform. Yeah, you get butterflies and such, but once the curtain opens, what you have worked so hard to achieve, just comes out of you. I remember years of playing, that I almost couldn't really remember the performances, because I just went into a mode where I kind of became an alter ego of myself. That later changed into a level of comfort ability, that made it even more fun to let my own personality come out, without losing myself in the moment.

Even today, I still feel a bit self conscious before I perform live, or even record drums or bass parts. But once I do it, I feel comfortable again. I wouldn't ever confuse confidence with being good enough. We can always improve, and new situations can always pull more from our talents. The first step though, IMO, is to be competent in what it is we have to offer, and use that to project the performance to others. It's funny, even a lesser talent, with apparent confidence, comes across as good, without being ludacris. lol! I made a joke. :)
 
You are right.... Confidence really is half the battle. I have to say your answer is inspiring and yet admittedly I also find it disheartening, because you, like my family members, started performing at a young age. While I have been singing (and recording myself singing) ever since I can remember, you all didn't wait the extra ten years that I have to show others what you think you can do. It's like the more time that goes by, the more afraid a person becomes of revealing their secret. I literally realized about two weeks ago that I do not want to be a fifty year old woman that looks back on her life and regrets never having pursued what she loves, and so I do need to start working my way towards revealing my voice and myself once and for all. Like you spoke of performing, the fear that is initially there is replaced in tenfold with a feeling of liberation. I suppose that is the feeling I should be pursuing. Not safety, but liberation.

jimmys69 said:
I wouldn't ever confuse confidence with being good enough. We can always improve, and new situations can always pull more from our talents. The first step though, IMO, is to be competent in what it is we have to offer, and use that to project the performance to others.
Click to expand...

That was beautifully said. I needed to hear that. Those words are game changers. You're just full of nuggets of wisdom aren't you!
 
I also agree with what jimmy said, confidence is key and once you own your voice and or your song writing style, you can easily perform honestly and the way you want to.

your recording was pretty nice except i think you need to breathe more deeply in the chorus'

Also, i had a similar awakening recently - why should i be in a constant state of wonder when all i have to do is give it a shot, all the people that are supportive and enjoy my lyrics and voice through my performances whether that be to a crowd of one or many, believe in me and i should too.

In short, keep believing and singing.
 
Actually I found my coach first try. From the second I walked in she did a great job of not making me feel judged or bad. Singing for her the first time was the hardest and she and I have talked about it alot. Nerves play a HUGE part in how you sound. If you're scared and tense you don't get the sound out that you want. If I can record something that doesn't make me want to throw my mic away I'll post it up.. I'll try a few different things tonight..

When looking for your coach though, dont settle. Figure out what you need and find it, it's your money and time, make sure you are getting what you need to make you feel comfortable. I am a guy and singing in front of a girl was easier. Might be different for a girl? Whatever it takes though!
 
Thought I would add part of my story here for you since we have alot going the same. I got into chorus when I was young (12 I think). Had auditions, made the cut. I was the only guy that year to get in and the teacher said I would sing all the male parts solo, which sounded fine. However the first time our real practice was going on I froze. Left the group, changed the class and never went back. I was terrified of singing from then on. Didn't sing in the shower, car, while playing rock band with friends. Until about 13 or so years later. The vocal lessons started a few months after I started singing again.

If I can be that scared of doing it and still get the courage, you definately can! Go after it and don't stop until you dont want it anymore.

janeparachutes said:
You are right.... Confidence really is half the battle. I have to say your answer is inspiring and yet admittedly I also find it disheartening, because you, like my family members, started performing at a young age. While I have been singing (and recording myself singing) ever since I can remember, you all didn't wait the extra ten years that I have to show others what you think you can do. It's like the more time that goes by, the more afraid a person becomes of revealing their secret. I literally realized about two weeks ago that I do not want to be a fifty year old woman that looks back on her life and regrets never having pursued what she loves, and so I do need to start working my way towards revealing my voice and myself once and for all. Like you spoke of performing, the fear that is initially there is replaced in tenfold with a feeling of liberation. I suppose that is the feeling I should be pursuing. Not safety, but liberation.



That was beautifully said. I needed to hear that. Those words are game changers. You're just full of nuggets of wisdom aren't you!
Click to expand...
 
I would say you have great potentials.. your voice is "nice" and intonation is generally good.
What you lack is experience.
I would suggest you sing sing sing sing sing sing sing sing sing sing sing and sing some more.
Practice makes perfect :)
 
I am not a singer, never have been, but I have had some management experience with small groups, where voices mattered (from folk singers to heavy rock). What has been beneficial to most, at the outset of their careers, is singing with others - ie. in a choir. Amateur choirs give you the opportunity to develope your style, learn new techniques, and even blossom to the extent of taking on some solos - but under the guidance of an experienced choir master.
From there you can perhaps get work as a backing vocalist (some of our most popular singers started out backing others - you have more chance of being spotted if you are inside the business rather than on the outside).
Practising on your own is a very lonely and sometimes dispiriting affair - singing with a choir would give you the chance of measuring your progress and prowess against your contemporaries, and in any event, doesn't stop you continuing with your own home recordings at the same time.

And yes - (1) do invest in a decent mic, and (2) try some covers of basic middle-of-the-road standards, not tricksy over-stylised modern stuff - you'll benefit more in the long run.
 
got a decent voice ..... work on it and you'll be a really good singer.

As for the confidence ..... that just comes from time and seeing people always react positively to your voice, which they will.

I've been playing/singing for my living for 45 years ...... i'm on stage every night and I don't even give it a thought.
If i were playing a gig with 10,000 people out there I'd be chomping at the bit to get out there ..... absolutely no worries about the crowd and, in fact, I'm more comfortable on stage than anywhere else.

As for doing it for a living ....... unless you make it big, and statistically it's extremely unlikely you will .......( there's LOTS of great singers trying for the same spots) ..... it's a really crappy way to make a living.

First off, and you can ask any full timer about this, we get paid the exact same money we got 40 years ago. 40 years ago $150 a night was good money ......... now, not so much. :p

And the music biz is tanking at a local level. The only way to consistantly make good money is doing covers.
I work more than most players doing 6 and 7 gigs a week and I struggle to get by.
For me it's the only thing for me ...... I have the music jones and nothing else matters. So the poverty part of it is just something I have to accept
if you're the same way then that's what you gotta do but don't be thinking you're just gonna start rolling in the money ...... for anyone other than top artists there is any money to roll in!

:)
 
janeparachutes said:
You are right.... Confidence really is half the battle. I have to say your answer is inspiring and yet admittedly I also find it disheartening, because you, like my family members, started performing at a young age. While I have been singing (and recording myself singing) ever since I can remember, you all didn't wait the extra ten years that I have to show others what you think you can do. It's like the more time that goes by, the more afraid a person becomes of revealing their secret. I literally realized about two weeks ago that I do not want to be a fifty year old woman that looks back on her life and regrets never having pursued what she loves, and so I do need to start working my way towards revealing my voice and myself once and for all. Like you spoke of performing, the fear that is initially there is replaced in tenfold with a feeling of liberation. I suppose that is the feeling I should be pursuing. Not safety, but liberation.



That was beautifully said. I needed to hear that. Those words are game changers. You're just full of nuggets of wisdom aren't you!
Click to expand...

I'm full of something, that is for sure. lol!
 
Lt. Bob said:
got a decent voice ..... work on it and you'll be a really good singer.

As for the confidence ..... that just comes from time and seeing people always react positively to your voice, which they will.

I've been playing/singing for my living for 45 years ...... i'm on stage every night and I don't even give it a thought.
If i were playing a gig with 10,000 people out there I'd be chomping at the bit to get out there ..... absolutely no worries about the crowd and, in fact, I'm more comfortable on stage than anywhere else.

As for doing it for a living ....... unless you make it big, and statistically it's extremely unlikely you will .......( there's LOTS of great singers trying for the same spots) ..... it's a really crappy way to make a living.

First off, and you can ask any full timer about this, we get paid the exact same money we got 40 years ago. 40 years ago $150 a night was good money ......... now, not so much. :p

And the music biz is tanking at a local level. The only way to consistantly make good money is doing covers.
I work more than most players doing 6 and 7 gigs a week and I struggle to get by.
For me it's the only thing for me ...... I have the music jones and nothing else matters. So the poverty part of it is just something I have to accept
if you're the same way then that's what you gotta do but don't be thinking you're just gonna start rolling in the money ...... for anyone other than top artists there is any money to roll in!

:)
Click to expand...

Must spread rep......

You got it down man. Props to ya! :D
 
Lt. Bob said:
...for anyone other than top artists there is any money to roll in!

:)
Click to expand...

Even for top artists, it takes a few years/albums before they start rolling in the money. (Just finished reading Confessions of a Recording Engineer - the music industry is sooo fucked up.)

So the poverty part of it is just something I have to accept
Click to expand...

Hey Bob, i thought your wife was super rich and you drove to gigs in a bentley!! :eek:
 
not too bad. it's not the kind of song you should try though. very tough. i think you should always pick material suited to what you can do and not just asong you love. i've got a 15 year old daughter and she does the same thing. we argue ( when recording) and she finally steers herself to songs that are right for her. good luck
 
Yep your a singer all right...but I would suggest you find your own style. I know this is a very rough mix, but to me it just sounds like what has come before you. You need to develop your own style, take this music and make it your own...have confidence in yourself, is very important...you got the chops man, now GRAB it and MOULD it...
 
Speaking as a music producer, you have a great natural tone. Breath control and delivery is going to be your biggest obstacle. I think the thing that you have going for you is your passion. Even through the mistakes and bad notes I can hear your passion. The singing is just a technical thing for the most part. The passion is what needs to be conveyed and thats what you've done. If you can just over come those pitch problems then you'll be a force to be reconed with. I see you as a mix between Keisha cole and Brandy.
 
Practice, practice, and more practice, and then even some after that. I had a music teacher that hard on me but she did help me mold my voice. I didn't do anything special but I did a lot of scaling and pitching. My throat used to be sore for days.
 
It sounds pretty good :), the only improvements i see would be controlling your voice a little better and developing a good breathing technique (something I'm struggling to do myself). I also think your stretching your range too far, i feel when you sing some of the higher parts your more screaming it out than singing? But thatll all get better with practice :)
 
I can hear a lot of potential in you voice and I do like the overall sound. To be critical, the only thing I would comment on that needs work is the high end (like in the chorus it sounded like you were struggling just a little...) however that also could have been the mic control/placement interfering as another user also commented on, or if you were holding back and not letting it all out...i do that too sometimes if im recording at home and i dont want to freak out the neighbors.... Everything else though, I loved, you sound very smokey yet classy :P don't give up. I don't think it's too late for anyone to pursue their happiness. :P
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top