Hi All.... would love some feedback

[JohnOnoLennon]

Hi All,

I was wondering if you could have a listen, I'd like to apolgise in regards to the quality of the recording it was done in a bedroom with an old analogue 4 track around 6-7 years ago...I know I would have to go to a proper studio to get them done again. If you could just listen to the actual song...as I know the recording sucks! lol..

I done the recordings, copyrighting etc etc a few years back, was just wondering if I could get some constructive feedback?

Your time is very much appreciated! Thanks!

Here is my channel with the two recordings..

https://www.youtube.com/user/PaulNicholas2010?feature=mhum

Again, thank you very much!

 

[FunkDaddy]

New York's Alright: can barely understand what you're saying.

I Know: Melody stays centered on the same couple of notes throughout the entire track, gets very boring. Vocals go flat quite a bit.

 

[PYRRHO]

I'm not trying to be mean, and would not have said anything had you not asked but...


it's absolutely horrible. Recording quality is the least of your concerns...there is nothing redeeming or hopeful about any of it. The vocals are terrible...the arrangement, the writing, the performance, it's all...just horrendous.

Again...not trying to be mean, but you need to know the truth before you do anything foolish...like waste money in a professional studio, or god forbid...perform in front of an audience.

 

[Armistice]

New York's Alright - too too long - I was looking for the exits by 1:30 because you are repeatedly hammering a very simple structure.


I Know - Paul, you're no singer. Flat all over the place. You continually end lines on a vocal uplift against a long vowel sound, and that's the worst part of your voice - when you're descending you're better. I know this as I have the same issue... The song is again, very simply structured and repetitive, and the lyrics are, frankly, trite.

As you asked, you need to make these things more musically and/or lyrically interesting, they're just a bit nothing at the moment...

 

[JohnOnoLennon]

New York's Alright - too too long - I was looking for the exits by 1:30 because you are repeatedly hammering a very simple structure.


I Know - Paul, you're no singer. Flat all over the place. You continually end lines on a vocal uplift against a long vowel sound, and that's the worst part of your voice - when you're descending you're better. I know this as I have the same issue... The song is again, very simply structured and repetitive, and the lyrics are, frankly, trite.

As you asked, you need to make these things more musically and/or lyrically interesting, they're just a bit nothing at the moment...

Hi,

Thank you very much! very constructive, just what I was looking for...

As I say these were recorded around 6-7 years ago, I'd like to think I've improved a hell of a lot vocally...

I do agree with the lyrics on "I know" they would be re-written.. I also agree with the simply structure These two were the first couple of songs I wrote when I only knew around 8 chords! lol...

"Flat all over the place. You continually end lines on a vocal uplift against a long vowel sound"

That's a great bit of advice that I will really look into!

Also the "New York" now has a middle 8 and moves in a different temp then the original...

I will say these replies are a lot different from most of the feedback from a few music producers..... but I do appreciate all comments that are constructive!!

Thanks!

 

[JohnOnoLennon]

I'm not trying to be mean, and would not have said anything had you not asked but...


it's absolutely horrible. Recording quality is the least of your concerns...there is nothing redeeming or hopeful about any of it. The vocals are terrible...the arrangement, the writing, the performance, it's all...just horrendous.

Again...not trying to be mean, but you need to know the truth before you do anything foolish...like waste money in a professional studio, or god forbid...perform in front of an audience.

Thanks for the constructive feedback....

 

[sharonclowe]

I'm afraid I have the same opinion as those already expressed ...at least you're taking the criticism without becoming defensive. You can always try to improve, but you might want to consider other ways besides singing to express yourself artistically. Maybe find a friend who likes to sing the music you write? Best wishes.