I just want my own band!!!!!!

Resurrect

Resurrect

New member
:cursing: I can't even find anybody who is willing to jam on a consistent basis. I've got a good bassist friend who would love to jam with me, but he lives 2.5 hours away, making it hard for us to get together. I'm so flippin' sick and tired of making music by myself.

I have started going to open mic nights at a local coffee shop here, but so far haven't come across anybody I would even remotely consider working with. The artists who are skilled, already have their own bands with no need for another member. And all the dudes who might wanna join up simply can't play to save their lives.

Boy! This stinks! :cursing:
 
Yeah, welcome to life. I feel like this is how it goes for about 95% of musicians who are passionate about music and wanting to jam.
 
You'd think that if 95% of us have this problem that we should have no trouble finding each other. Lol. But, it doesn't seem to work that way for some reason.
 
I gave up long ago. Too little time, too little give-a-damn. Now my bandmates are ready to jam when I am, night or day. ;)

I've heard one of your songs. It was well sung and played, the song was promising. Plenty there for a collaborator to hook into. You could use a drummer, but they're hard to find. The open mic is your best route. Talk to the ones whose playing you respect. Even if they have gigs, some of them might still work. Especially if you offer a project that's worth their time. Good players often have several gigs, main or side. Or they might be able to put you onto someone. If you're doing stuff on a religious theme, talk to players in the church groups.

Good luck.
 
Resurrect said:
You'd think that if 95% of us have this problem that we should have no trouble finding each other. Lol. But, it doesn't seem to work that way for some reason.
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The reason is that every single one of those 95% ALSO want their own band, not to play in someone else's.
 
I've not played in a band for years, I don't even record that much, but I kept plugging away just cos I love playing the guitar. Then a couple of months ago I got the chance to play guitar in someone else's band and it's great, really enjoying the experience of playing live.

It's much less hassle being the guitar player for what's basically a solo act. You're all just there to make her songs sound good, no egos.
 
I too am tired of playing by myself. I have posted on craigslist several time without luck, I think my age and taste in music puts some people off. At this time I have given up trying to find anyone, although my daughter and I are going to work up half a dozen christmas songs this years. She plays flute.
 
Musicians are like what congress has become. Everybody wants everything all their way, all the time. Nobody's willing to compromise - I'll do this if you'll do that.
 
I personally wouldn't mind playing in someone else's band. Just so's I could play with people. I'd have to be passionate about the music I'm playing, but it wouldn't bother me if they weren't necessarily my songs.
 
Well, I happily play in two bands, and what works for me is to get in with an already existing band and then prove your worth by being a badass. Once you've proven your worth you can assert yourself with confidence and they'll have no choice but to listen. And if they don't, you just move on. Most importantly you need to find a style that you want to play. Obviously you have to be able to somewhat tolerate not being the only creative force, but if you're good and prove yourself you can easily have a lot of input. It's great NOT being the main guy. You don't want to book shows, run the band's internet presence, keep up with merch, etc. That shit sucks. Sucks bad. You wanna be the player with creative input and no other responsibilities.
 
Greg_L said:
You wanna be the player with creative input and no other responsibilities.
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^^^this

At the moment, it's great. I'm playing well, chucking ideas in and getting to meet and play with loads of good musicians from the city I work in during the week which is actually only an hour from my home when driving late at night after rehearsals.
 
Resurrect said:
:cursing: I can't even find anybody who is willing to jam on a consistent basis. I've got a good bassist friend who would love to jam with me, but he lives 2.5 hours away, making it hard for us to get together. I'm so flippin' sick and tired of making music by myself.

I have started going to open mic nights at a local coffee shop here, but so far haven't come across anybody I would even remotely consider working with. The artists who are skilled, already have their own bands with no need for another member. And all the dudes who might wanna join up simply can't play to save their lives.

Boy! This stinks! :cursing:
Click to expand...

I understand your frustration.

However, whining is not the answer. Networking and working hard to make sure you have something to offer Is.

You can ether start a band or join a band.

In the first case you really had better have something to offer. Songs, chops, rehearsal space, mktg skills, connections, charisma, etc.

In the second case you still have to have something to offer but it's not as demanding as being a band founder.

You say you want your own band?

Well if you join an existing band, once you are past the probationary period and are accepted, it is your band. Its not the guitar player down the street's band.

Trouble finding musicians? Get off the damn internet. Hit the streets, hit the clubs, avoid coffee shops, get to know musicans in the real world.
None of us here matter.

Still cant find musicians?? If you are serious, move to a place with a larger musical population.

Bottom line, you want a band, you gotta put in the work, and have something to offer.
 
Are you in a really small town? If they have a GC there or close by, or any other music shops in the area, go and get to know the people there. Tell them what you're looking for and ask for advice. There's usually a board somewhere where you can put up your info and find others. And I disagree with getting off the internet. If there isn't already one in your area, start a FB group of musicians seeking same. And don't just go to open mic nights, go out and see local bands. Get to know them before and after and during breaks. Just because they've got a guitar player now doesn't mean that they won't be looking for one in the near future. Or maybe you click with another player and they ask you to start a new band with them. There are just all kinds of possibilities.
 
I don't miss the "work" part of gigging. I do miss the adrenaline rush of the actual performing.
 
I flat out don't have time for a band, nor the patience really. Not to mention: late nights, hauling gear, playing in bars, dealing with drunks, etc. But I find myself thinking it might be fun to play in a low-stress band as a sideman. On bass, preferably.
 
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