groucho
Member
So recently I finally got together the bread to upgrade from my piece of shit generic C-Series dog-ass pawnshop electric guitar I've been whanging on for years. I've spent many an hour trolling through the forum here, learning a great deal about you good people (and occasionally learning *from* you as well - heh).
I've spent 2 weeks going to every music store in the greater SF Bay Area in search of the Telecaster that had Mine writ on it. I was prepared to ante up for an American, was willing to settle for a decent Mexican or Japanese, had no thought of even stooping to a Squire.
What happened? I played so many Teles, they began to blur together in a dreamy swirl of maple and chrome. EVERY damn Tele I played had something that kept it from being The One.
Finally, in despair I slumped down in the corner of Zone Music in Cotati, figuring I'd have to start combing the pawnshops or flea markets or something.
Just to keep blood in my fingers I grabbed a guitar from the rack and started noodling. Suddenly my heart leapt! THIS was the feel I'd been trying to find. The tone, the snap, the action, the LOVE, people! I plugged it in and played the living daylights out of it. No rattling, buzzing, weird dead spots, and the thing stayed in PERFECT freakin' tune after an hour of my abuse.
20 minutes later (and about $600 less than I was willing to spend) I was on my way.... with a SQUIRE STANDARD TELE.
I couldn't believe it myself. Every guy in the shop played the damn thing too, and it was damn hard to get it out of the hands of whoever was playing it. They kept shaking their heads and mumbling "well, I guess sometimes one squeaks through..."
I actually had to forcibly remove the guitar from the hands of the tech dude who did a little setup for me (it didn't need much). He was cranking out blues licks with a crazed imbecilic smile on his unshaven face.
So...
The lessons I have learned about buying guitars are as follows:
1) There is no consumer product in the world with less consistent quality than the electric guitar. No two are the same, and it doesn't matter what the damn name is on the label. It's still a crap shoot whether you get what you want.
2) Nothing anyone says on an internet forum (or anywhere else) about "which guitar is good and which guitar sucks" means doodly-squat. There's lots of great info to be gleaned on forums like this. Which guitar you should buy is NOT among that info. Don't even ask. Don't.
3) Anyone who buys a guitar sight-unseen - on Ebay or any online store, is a fool.
for that matter:
4) Anyone who gets a used sight-unseen guitar from a total stranger on ebay for like, $30 less than they could get a NEW one (most of the people on ebay fall into this category) is a really big fool.
5) If you don't treat the guy behind the counter like the ignorant jerk you suspect he is, he will do lots of things for you free of charge. He will set up your new guitar without charging you the $50 he lays on the other suckers. He will throw in free strings when the manager's head is turned. Why? Because from his point of view, we guitar players are know-it-all condescending assholes who play the same stale fucking licks over and over and treat the store staff like peasants. And he's damn grateful when someone shows him a *hint* of respect.
Having said all that...
6) Anyone who works at Guitar Center is dumber than a fucking rock. Period.
That's it. Time to *play*.
Cheers,
Chris
I've spent 2 weeks going to every music store in the greater SF Bay Area in search of the Telecaster that had Mine writ on it. I was prepared to ante up for an American, was willing to settle for a decent Mexican or Japanese, had no thought of even stooping to a Squire.
What happened? I played so many Teles, they began to blur together in a dreamy swirl of maple and chrome. EVERY damn Tele I played had something that kept it from being The One.
Finally, in despair I slumped down in the corner of Zone Music in Cotati, figuring I'd have to start combing the pawnshops or flea markets or something.
Just to keep blood in my fingers I grabbed a guitar from the rack and started noodling. Suddenly my heart leapt! THIS was the feel I'd been trying to find. The tone, the snap, the action, the LOVE, people! I plugged it in and played the living daylights out of it. No rattling, buzzing, weird dead spots, and the thing stayed in PERFECT freakin' tune after an hour of my abuse.
20 minutes later (and about $600 less than I was willing to spend) I was on my way.... with a SQUIRE STANDARD TELE.
I couldn't believe it myself. Every guy in the shop played the damn thing too, and it was damn hard to get it out of the hands of whoever was playing it. They kept shaking their heads and mumbling "well, I guess sometimes one squeaks through..."
I actually had to forcibly remove the guitar from the hands of the tech dude who did a little setup for me (it didn't need much). He was cranking out blues licks with a crazed imbecilic smile on his unshaven face.
So...
The lessons I have learned about buying guitars are as follows:
1) There is no consumer product in the world with less consistent quality than the electric guitar. No two are the same, and it doesn't matter what the damn name is on the label. It's still a crap shoot whether you get what you want.
2) Nothing anyone says on an internet forum (or anywhere else) about "which guitar is good and which guitar sucks" means doodly-squat. There's lots of great info to be gleaned on forums like this. Which guitar you should buy is NOT among that info. Don't even ask. Don't.
3) Anyone who buys a guitar sight-unseen - on Ebay or any online store, is a fool.
for that matter:
4) Anyone who gets a used sight-unseen guitar from a total stranger on ebay for like, $30 less than they could get a NEW one (most of the people on ebay fall into this category) is a really big fool.
5) If you don't treat the guy behind the counter like the ignorant jerk you suspect he is, he will do lots of things for you free of charge. He will set up your new guitar without charging you the $50 he lays on the other suckers. He will throw in free strings when the manager's head is turned. Why? Because from his point of view, we guitar players are know-it-all condescending assholes who play the same stale fucking licks over and over and treat the store staff like peasants. And he's damn grateful when someone shows him a *hint* of respect.
Having said all that...
6) Anyone who works at Guitar Center is dumber than a fucking rock. Period.
That's it. Time to *play*.
Cheers,
Chris
All I really meant was that you can't know much about how a guitar actually plays by reading a description and squinting at a blurry photo.
and the Gretsh was 2,200 so I couldn't buy it.