The Seasons of You and Me

F

Freddy

New member
My last one was a bit sad, so I needed to counter it with something more frothy, if only for my own sanity.

I haven't really edited these lyrics much yet and think the song may be too long (and maybe a little hackneyed), but thought I would throw them out for input - hope you don't mind :)

I get a few days off this week, so may even get a chance to record something (depending on my "honey-do" list, of course :) ).

The Seasons of You and Me

Feels fine, Summer-time
We’re off to see a friend of mine
Feels like the world is locked in tune
Sunshine, cold white wine
You got rhythm, I got rhyme
Beautiful Sunday afternoon

Chorus:
And I’m so glad that I spent the day with you
On days like this I’m so glad to be alive
This is the story of how our lives should be
These are the seasons of you and me

Wind, trees, fallen leaves
Floating in the Autumn breeze
I’m wearing this new sweater made by you
So pleased your my squeeze
I love Autumn days like these
You know this sweater’s big enough for two?

Chorus:
And I’m so glad that I spent the day with you
On days like this I’m so glad to be alive
This is the story of how our lives should be
These are the seasons of you and me

Bridge:
Jack Frost and his Winter choir
Can’t touch the heat of our desire
It helps to have an open fire
It helps to be with you
The snow had fallen virgin-white
We bought a tree and fairy lights
A Christmas day, a Christmas night
The best I ever knew

Chorus:
And I’m so glad I spent Christmas-time with you
You made me so glad to be alive
This is how all Christmases should be
And you should know you made it so for me

Come Spring, it all begins
The touch of sun upon the skin
First blossom on the tree arrives
April showers, wild flowers
Picked to match this love of ours
These must be the best days of our lives

Chorus:
And I’m so glad that I spent this time with you
I’m so glad that you feel the same way too
This is the story of how you set me free
These are the seasons of you and me​
 
I like this, I'm more a fan of happy endings... ;)

If you don't put in a lead break, this shouldn't be too long IMHO.

These two lines don't seem to match the writing in the rest of the song. They are good lines but seem a tad out of place with the rest of it.
I’m wearing this new sweater made by you
You know this sweater’s big enough for two?

You have a knack for writing with imagery and touch the senses with your words. :cool:

The rhyming structure is very cool, rhyme within a rhyme..... :cool:

The bridge is my favorite part....

I like this a lot....
 
Yeah, I'm a sap for sappy stuff. ;) Good work here. It reads well and I especially like the bridge. I think the bridge is well crafted and fits the song perfectly.
 
Thanks guys, I'll look at the sweater line. It was meant to be jokey, but maybe doesn't work very well.

I've spotted a few improvements too since I posted it. It feels like it might work, though.... even if it feels funny to do a "sappy" song for a change :)
 
OK, I had a play around at recording this yesterday.

Here it is ..


Vocals need to be redone (once I have the lyrics finalised), but you can see how it stands so far - usual caveats (I am neither a singer or a recording engineer, etc....). There is one good singer on there tho (hint: right at the start and at the end :) )

Lyrics have been altered slightly, but still need work (especially the second verse - you may notice that I stumble over it in the recording). Not sure if I just need to practice it or if I need to simplify it a bit.

As they are now:

Seasons (of you and me)​

Feels fine, Summer-time
Going to see a friend of mine
Feels like the world is locked in tune
Sunshine, cold white wine
You got rhythm, I got rhyme
Beautiful Sunday afternoon

I’m so glad to have spent the day with you
On days like this I’m so glad to be alive
This is the story of how a love should be
Seasons of you and me

Oak trees, fallen leaves
Floating in the Autumn breeze
A country walk through woods and fields stripped bare
So pleased you’re my squeeze
I love Autumn days like these
Smiling as the wind plays with your hair

I’m so glad to have spent the day with you
On days like this I’m so glad to be alive
This is the story of how a love should be
Seasons of you and me

Bridge:
Jack Frost and his Winter choir
Can’t touch the heat of our desire
It helps to have an open fire
It helps to be with you
The snow had fallen virgin-white
We bought a tree and fairy lights
A Christmas day, a Christmas night
The best I ever knew

I’m so glad I spent Christmas-time with you
You make me feel so glad to be alive
This, it seems to me, is how Christmases should be
And you should know you made it so for me

Come Spring, it all begins
The touch of sun upon the skin
First blossom on the tree arrives
April showers, wild flowers
Picked to match this love of ours
These must be the best days of our lives

I’m so glad to have spent my days with you
You make me feel so glad to be alive
This is the story of how you set me free
Seasons of you and me
Seasons of you and me

Do do do to fade​

All suggestions for improvement appreciated :)
 
I really wanna hear this but your link isnt working for me :(

Great job on the lyrics, they serve as inspiration to push myself further than I do.


Mike
 
Odd, it works for me - maybe the site had a problem when you tried.

Thanks for the comment on the lyrics (personally I find them a bit soppy :) ) .. I hope the song itself isn't too much of a let-down! It builds, starting very slow.. I'm not in love with it tho..
 
Freddy said:
I’m so glad to have spent the day with you
On days like this I’m so glad to be alive
This is the story of how a love should be
Seasons of you and me
Click to expand...
Freddy,

I would try to rhyme line 1 and 2 of the chorus. That's it....
The first line of the chorus is fabulous, it has a Beatle-ish flavor I really like.
If not done, it's pretty close - just some practice maybe, until you're happy with the take... :D

Some recording suggestions....just to make this a more pleasing listen :o
- do some de-essing, and/or turn the highs down a bit
- turn up the volume on the vocals
- add some bass to the overall mix.
- reduce the effects on the vocals a bit for clarity

Some recording cool points I like that you've done here.... :cool:
- cool effects on vocals and instruments
- nice panning and separation
- the bird is a cool touch
- vocal track(s) are done well

Okay so enough of the mix - this isn't the mp3 clinic :rolleyes:

Good One.....

:D :) :D :)
 
Thanks Ido.

I'm very new to recording, and am grateful for all the tips I can get! Yes, it's a bit strident :) I suspect I kept the vocals lowish due to lack of confidence in them. I'll practice the song a bit and then turn them up when I get them right:) -

Edit: I tweaked the song a bit, turned up the vocals and tried to tame some highs. Then I thought it might be easier to keep it simple, so cut everything except the basics and was left with a simple acoustic version ..


Hmm, you think the chorus could do with a rhyming second line? That would be quite easy I think. How about something like:

I'm so glad that I spent the day with you
You make me feel like I'm seeing life anew​

or

I'm so glad that I spent the day with you
You bring a touch of magic to everything we do​

.. I'll play with it...

Thanks for the feedback :)
 
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