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Yo Yo Yo, Dawg!

Santa Swindell here to tell you about the hottest new thing in Hip Hop, PashMaster P!!!!!!!
Rappin with all the ghetto cred he can muster (coming from suburban Hamilton), he will take you on a trip to HIS hood, where everything is Fast and Danger! That's the title of his new CD, "FAST AND DANGER"!

AND IT'S AVAILABLE JUST IN TIME FOR CHRISTMAS!!!!!!!!

This dude got angst, dawg!!!! Check out these titles....

"40 Ounces of Molson"

"Get Out My Face, Mounty!"

"Who He Pater Be?"

And the sensational

"Dis Starbuck's Cold!"


Don't be left out! Get your copy now! PashMaster P will only be popular for 5-6 months, so GET IN ON THIS PHENOMENON WHILE IT'S STILL HOT!!!!!!





Colonel Bob Swindell
C.E.O.
Starmaker Records
 

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SPECIAL ANNOUNCEMENT!!!!!!


Starmaker Records is holding an open submission promotion to find the Stars Of Tomorrow!
We're looking for talented, dedicated artists and writers who have the drive to become the Next Big Thing!
Those selected will receive a Real Record Contract with Starmaker Records, a 30 city tour, and a spot on the new compilation CD entitled "The Idiot Element"!
Stop wasting your time posting MP3s on internet sites - GET IN THE REAL GAME!!!!! this comp CD will be played ON THE RADIO!!!!



How to submit:

Mail your submission (CD/Tape/Lyrics), along with a cashier's check or money order for the amount of $2500./U.S. to

Starmaker Records
Attn: Bruce Bearston
Route 41
Possum Hollow, Tenn. 37215
 
Buffalo Bob said:
SPECIAL ANNOUNCEMENT!!!!!!


Starmaker Records is holding an open submission promotion to find the Stars Of Tomorrow!
We're looking for talented, dedicated artists and writers who have the drive to become the Next Big Thing!
Those selected will receive a Real Record Contract with Starmaker Records, a 30 city tour, and a spot on the new compilation CD entitled "The Idiot Element"!
Stop wasting your time posting MP3s on internet sites - GET IN THE REAL GAME!!!!! this comp CD will be played ON THE RADIO!!!!



How to submit:

Mail your submission (CD/Tape/Lyrics), along with a cashier's check or money order for the amount of $2500./U.S. to

Starmaker Records
Attn: Bruce Bearston
Route 41
Possum Hollow, Tenn. 37215

DON'T DO IT FOLKS! IT'S A SCAM!

I have attached the following arial photo of Possum Hollow:
 

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Do not listen to him!!!!!


He is just one of the Idiot Element Know-nothing-Barroom-Tenors trying to steer you away from The Opportunity Of A Lifetime!!!!

Our CD Compilations have made the carreers of many of the young upcoming acts. A case in point is the NEW CD by Starmaker's Newest Signing.......................


Cole Taylor!


The new CD, entitled "Drifter" is currently charting at # 675 on the Billboard Hot 1000!!!!!!

BUY the new Cole Taylor CD, and submit your material for the new Compilation CD from Starmaker - The Future Of Music!




Colonel Bob Swindell
PO Box 56
Buzzard's Roost, Montana
 

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Buffalo Bob said:
Do not listen to him!!!!!


He is just one of the Idiot Element Know-nothing-Barroom-Tenors trying to steer you away from The Opportunity Of A Lifetime!!!!

Our CD Compilations have made the carreers of many of the young upcoming acts. A case in point is the NEW CD by Starmaker's Newest Signing.......................


Cole Taylor!


The new CD, entitled "Drifter" is currently charting at # 675 on the Billboard Hot 1000!!!!!!

BUY the new Cole Taylor CD, and submit your material for the new Compilation CD from Starmaker - The Future Of Music!




Colonel Bob Swindell
PO Box 56
Buzzard's Roost, Montana

HOGWASH! How could such an ugly bastard be on any chart??!
 
He may be ugly, but HE SELLS RECORDS!!!!!!

(unlike some Idiot-Element-Barroom-Sopranos who will never MAKE IT because they DON'T UNDERSTAND HOW THE MUSIC BUSINESS BUSINESS WORKS!!!)





B.B.S.
Starmaker Ent.
 
Happy New Year, suckers........I mean, Potential Clients! We've been very busy at Starmaker, getting ready for the 2nd Annual STARMAKER MUSIC CONFERENCE! We're sprucing up the Lubbock Grange Hall in preparation for the conference.
Here's a candid shot of Dimwit Cooper, one of our consultants putting up some advertising logos in the hall.


Buffalo
 

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We at Starmaker Enterprises are proud to announce the launching of our new STARMAKER SWAMP TOURS!!!!!!


Spend two relaxing weeks touring the great swamps of Florida in our custom STARMAKER TOUR BUS, "The STARBUS"!!! Lounge on the roof of the bus as you fish for catfish and gar, while listening to the incomparable sounds of JohhnyVee, our newest signing! Johnny will wow you with his special brand of kletzmer music, accompanying himself on jaw harp and banjo.
In the evenings, there’s a gator hunt and frog gigging, as well as a performance of Native American Seminole dances, performed by Chief Dan Billy Twoshoes, of Belle Glade.

Book now for the summer season! (and don’t forget the bug spray)




Buffalo Bob Swindell
Starmaker Swamp Tours
Route 41 and the Big Cypress Tree
Belle Glade, Florida
 

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Where do you get this stuff man? You crack me up!

:D :D :D :D :D

- Tanlith -

P.S. I'm back... in case anyone missed me! :p
 
Bob doesn't have a real job and only works at the bowling alley part time. He's got a lot of time to create.
 
"Bob doesn't have a real job and only works at the bowling alley part time. He's got a lot of time to create."





What a devastating comeback!:D :D :D






Aren't you supposed to be cruising the bus station for chickens, Davey?:D
 
I have created http://indieintrusion.com/

I don't charge anything
It tells you for free HOW to promote yourself
it tells you what you can do to promote your music without the $$$$
It has links to other places that allow you to freely promote
and I promote TONS of indies for nothing because I want to!

.. you don't need to spend money on any package!!!
You can't tell anyone what A&R is looking for... hell they don't even know..
and Sh*t from the sounds of the radio lately...
like they even have a clue.

I have befriended someone from the industry whom I speak to regularly that has a list of credentials longer than your arm ...that he didn't get from a school taught bachlors degree BUT FROM EXPERIENCE...

and he assist me as well as other in offering his knowledge for free!!!!

THAT i can trust.

I'm not looking to gain anything through what I do..
nor is robinhood( Rick Iantosca )..
but we freely assist and try to EMPOWER INDIES for the love of music and not the love of $$$ in your poscket.

Anyone that promises you such ridiculous things as how to make X amount of dollars and guaranteed ANYTHING
I say is FULL of it.

The industry is a business and there is NO GUARENTEES!!
wtf ever...
pahh...

and you want me to pay$$ to be in your forums???
lmao
W_H_A_T_E_V_E_R...

there is TONS of free information out there people, and I am trying to sort it in one place to assist you..

http://indieintrusion.com.

that is designed to help you as an indie artist learn how you can help yourself and YOU music... It's FREE

DON'T FALL FOR THIS PEOPLE.

And you don't need TAXI or any other paying service when you have so many other options out there...
EMPOWER YOURSELVES PEOPLE!!!
Peace!

*exits left*
 
Hi. Although I am a"newbie" I have aquired some recording credentials through the years. You can find them at: http://www.allmusic.com/cg/amg.dll?p=amg&uid=UIDSUB040311290048430685&sql=R222388#APPEAR
I am in complete agreement with Jennae. If there were such a package as Hooper is offering, I would have found it a long time ago. Although I am an industry record producer, I assist indies as well as anyone who has any questions regarding the industry. I highly recommend Jennae's Indie Intrusion site and support it.

It is all "too often" that some genious comes along offering to help you for $. Don't do it! Either use Jennae's site or Email me at: beach0339053@comcast.net for any questions you may have. No, there is no charge for this...unless you start buying D. Hoopers package (just kidding).

Great site...nice to be here...just a shame I had to look at Hoopers post first...pretty disgusting.
Rick Iantosca
(Robinhood)
 
Jennae said:
You can't tell anyone what A&R is looking for... hell they don't even know..
and Sh*t from the sounds of the radio lately...
like they even have a clue.

Just because you don't like it doesn't mean it isn't any good. There are plenty of successful albums on the radio right now.

Jennae said:
Anyone that promises you such ridiculous things as how to make X amount of dollars and guaranteed ANYTHING I say is FULL of it.

The industry is a business and there is NO GUARENTEES!!
wtf ever...
pahh...

Who is guaranteeing that you'll make a certain amount of money?

Jennae said:
there is TONS of free information out there people, and I am trying to sort it in one place to assist you..

Most free information is being given away because it's not worth paying for. Not saying that your site isn't any good...checked it out and couldn't really find any info on the music industry in general...just links to songs by you and others.

And the following list...

1. CREATE/HAVE A PROMO PICTURE
2. GET A WEBSITE!!
3. OFFER A DOWNLOAD!!
4. GET YOUR CONTACT INFO OUT THERE!!
5. TAG YOUR SONGS PROPERLY!!!
6. I DON'T RECOMMEND FLASH ARTIST_WEBSITES!

Jennae, how is this working for you?
 
Robinhood said:
...but what would I know?

As far as playing and recording in a major label environment, probably a lot.

As far as selling records today, you tell me.
 
If you want to know anything about the industry that I can assist you with, just ask. If I know the answer, I would be glad to help. Try and be specific. If you need to, you can Email me at: beach033053@comcast.net if you wish not to post. There is no charge for any information I may offer...and no...I am not being sarcastic.

Rick Iantosca
(Robinhood)
 
"These Methods Are All You Need…
Guaranteed!
And that's a real guarantee, too. I'm so convinced my help is all you need to sell more CDs, get more people to your shows, and make more money in this music business that I offer the following guarantee.............
Hi. My name is David Hooper and I'm a music promotion consultant and author based out of Nashville. You may have read my book, "How I Make $100,000/year in the Music Business (Without a Record Label, Manager, or Booking Agent)" or attended my music business conference, 2NMC"

that is a quote from your site...

Now mind you yes my site is new and it is less than a month old...
but how is it working for ME??

it's not working for ME
it's working for the INDIES!

what a concept.


"Most free information is being given away because it's not worth paying for. Not saying that your site isn't any good...checked it out and couldn't really find any info on the music industry in general...just links to songs by you and others.
And the following list...

1. CREATE/HAVE A PROMO PICTURE
2. GET A WEBSITE!!
3. OFFER A DOWNLOAD!!
4. GET YOUR CONTACT INFO OUT THERE!!
5. TAG YOUR SONGS PROPERLY!!!
6. I DON'T RECOMMEND FLASH ARTIST_WEBSITES!

Jennae, how is this working for you?"



YES !!!!!!!!!I recommend the following!
1. CREATE/HAVE A PROMO PICTURE
2. GET A WEBSITE!!
3. OFFER A DOWNLOAD!!
4. GET YOUR CONTACT INFO OUT THERE!!
5. TAG YOUR SONGS PROPERLY!!!
6. I DON'T RECOMMEND FLASH ARTIST_WEBSITES!

and go here to read why
http://freewebs.com/jennaesindieintrusion/



here people try some of these site to promote YOURSELF FOR FREE



Here's some good places to start self promoting!

( * ) - Indicates places I myself have uploaded music at. There are a few others I dont recall off the top of my head, and some of these on this list are not current or worth your time. I will try to add tid bits on these sites as I sift through them dominating the internet music scene.. muwahahaha.


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------


Rateourband.com
Soundclick *
Besonic *
Ampcast (not free) *
Artistlaunch *
VitaminC *
Acidplanet (wma files only) *
zed.cbc *
Adopt A Band *
Broadjam *
Zebox *
Garageband(have to review songs to gain uploads) *
Songramp *
MP3.com (currently going through ownership changes and disabled)
1sound
Musicbuilder
Indie Connections
Artistdirect (Industry Only)
Psymag
Iuma
MP3lizard
Avantnoise
Butlermusic
Cornerband
Hitmixuk
Kick In The Head (Canadian Only)
MP3 AU
MP3 DE
MP3 IT
New Music Canada (Canada Only)
The Music
UK Sound
Virtual Volume
Afternight
Artistforum
Audiogalaxy
Get Out There
Emergentmusic
Farm Fresh Music
Freemusic
Getmusic
Indielaunch
Javamusic
Loudenergy
Made In Music
Mbus
Mpulse
Random Artsit
Christian MP3
Hubba
Wanna Be Famous (not free)
Clearchannel New Music Network
Get Me Music (not free)
Songwriterstreet
Hitquarters (A&R Resource)
Into Music
Peoplesound
Guitar.com
Amazon.com
Electronicscene
Jagged Music (CD reseller)
Epitonic (Upload epicenter)
Ax3
Flashrock
DH NetRadio
Indiejournal.com
ListenSmart.com
ic-musicmedia.com
wildfirentx.com
Dmusic


Get Your Own FREE Website



"Most free information is being given away because it's not worth paying for."


BS!
there is a ton of great information out there FOR FREE and people like you want us the artist to think you have some all knowing knowledge..?!
BS this FREE info can't help....
I have just started what I am creating through INDIE INTRUSION
the I-AIM project is creating a movement to create it's OWN INDIE INDUSTRY!!



I don't agree with the record industry standards nor how the fine print reads for the most part and getting someone a record deal is NOT all it's cracked up to be.. so yeah..
I am not focused on INDUSTRY..... I'm focused on RAISING INDIE MUSIC to INDTRUDE on this so called elete record industry as we know it!



quote:
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Originally posted by Jennae
You can't tell anyone what A&R is looking for... hell they don't even know..
and Sh*t from the sounds of the radio lately...
like they even have a clue.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"Just because you don't like it doesn't mean it isn't any good. There are plenty of successful albums on the radio right now."

SURE...
But there are TON MORE INDIES that deserve to be heard!
Oh and tell me DAVE do you know HOW those artist got on the charts?? I mean seriously.. was it really THEIR MUSIC being so good it rocked it's way up the charts and onto the radio??

paying PAYOLA ????:oops:
PAYING 300,000-500,000 for a PROFESSIONAL CD???
blowing some old man on a couch for a chart postion...???
Don't humor me!

You go ahead and stroke your ego anyway you need to but here you say

"No Cost Ways to DOUBLE Your Fanbase "
UM HOW MUCH DO THESE ARTIST SEND YOU??
A BIT CONTRADICTIVE AIN'T IT???

"How to Pack Clubs Every Time "
YEAH IT'S CALLED SELF PROMOTING!

The Truth Behind Film/TV Music Licensing
OR JUST GO HERE... FOR FREE
http://songfile.com/ the harry fox agency... ;)
(AHEM)

"and much more..."
what more...

You tell me
what you can tell these people
I can't???
FOR FREE???

Your knowledge??
pahh
I got Robin (Rick Iantosca) and his contacts backing my info up??
what you got??
a music degree??

:rollseyes:

yeah you are right.. I am just starting
but you can be d*mn sure...
you'll be hearing my name again! ;)

And.. I am a single mother
broke as hell..
have no $$$
spent no $$$
don't have ANY fancy equiptment
do all my own promotions, and I haven't really even invested in myself yet..
and yep..
I have people interested...
I have created contacts...
I have started my own ball rolling...
and there was never any DAVID HOOPER
to assist me.

What I am saying is people
YOU CAN DO THIS WITHOUT SPENDING ANY $$$$ on this crap

come see me.... for free
I will help and If I can't I know someone who can.

Just like this site... these threads
there are things people don't know
and knowledge they need
but through INDIE ARTIST assisting one another
THERE IS INFO AVAILABLE TO HELP YOU

no miracle CD, TAPE, BOOK or PERSON that can guarantee anything!

EMPOWERED YOURSELVES PEOPLE.
 

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