Please Listen to these baby's

[Raven586]

Hi Guys

I would like everyone to please give these songs a listen.
There is a new mix of Shine (Some of you may remember)

Also a tune from my rocking bar days, with the band Red#2
(Set em up Shoot em down)

The last 3 songs were done about 10 years ago.
Shine is very recent

Thanks

Lee .S

Here is the Url For My Webpage. http://www.nowhereradio.com/artists/?aid=1519/

And the songs are here:http://www.nowhereradio.com/artists/album.php?aid=1519&alid=-1

 

[jake-owa]

Shine it is.

Is that the Alesis SR16...yes, yes it is.

I hate to say it but this song is booooring.

The recording and mixing is fine I guess but the writing is repetitive and dull. not thought provoking, inspiring of even mood inducing...just kind of blank.

 

[Raven586]

How about the other songs

Anyone ?

 

[Raven586]

Come on guys

Someone must have an opinion


Lee

 

[wfaraoni]

I listened to all of them and youve got something ready to pop stylewise here. But The recording quality ,or mixdown seems to keep the punch and snap from making it through as is needed. kind of distant or overcompressed. theres a lot of people here with better ears than me to help you out with just what to do.

Peace
Bill

 

[Toki987]

not a bad tune. It could use something around the end of the 2nd verse to break the repetition. Maybe another set of chords and a lyric line that take it to another level for about 1/2 a minute or more then drop back to the part for a solo to be instroduced. Then do the 3rd verse. You got something to work with here.

 

[ashulman]

Shine is ok but could be better with a chorus and maybe a little variation in the lyric. If you don't want to do that then cut it off at under two minutes. Really, there's nothing wrong with a short song. Shoot... never liked this whole genre so my comments won't help. In general, the recordings aren't bad, though maybe a little spare. A few more instruments might give them a little spark. After Shine, I found the songwriting a little uninspired. Boy, I seem to have nothing good to say today on any of my posts. Maybe I'm just in a bad mood.

 

[Raven586]

Thanks for the comments guys.
Anymore would be truly apreciated.

Lee.

 

[TripleM]

Listened to Shine. I remember this from before.

I liked the melody and feel to the song. I liked the singing voice for the most part. I'd like to hear what the vox would sound like if they were doubled. Some good opportunities for harmonies.

The guitars were a bit quiet as were the drums. Lyrically a few forced rhymes (e.g., how wonderful you shine, like a moonbeam in the corner of my eye).

Some small pitchiness in the vocals (e.g., at 1:03).

But still a good feel to the song.