New song - Never Ever (mostly acoustic)

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mjbphotos

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New mix posted - Never Ever (mostly acoustic)

Retracked some stuff, remixed based on suggestions posted here, thanks





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I don't usually share much in this clinic, as the majority of music seems to be rocking/electric guitar stuff.
This is a song I've been working on with songwriting help from the Muse website.
 
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I like the tune mjb, definitely more my style. The vocals sound pretty far out in parts (some of the doubling) but that could be what you're going for. The guitar sounds nice to me.
 
mjbphotos said:
I don't usually share much in this clinic, as the majority of music seems to be rocking/electric guitar stuff.
This is a song I've been working on with songwriting help from the Muse website.

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Yeah, but at least YOURS is good! Nice song. I keep forgetting how many of you guys are Brits until I hear you sing and then it sounds like The Who. :)

Is that acoustic a little loud or a little bright? I have a bit of a headache, so that might be making me think so. Unless it IS loud/bright.
 
mjbphotos said:
I don't usually share much in this clinic, as the majority of music seems to be rocking/electric guitar stuff.
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That's not really true. The first 7 or 8 threads in this forum right now are K-Dub's acoustic tune, A song for Jesus, music for a video game, Greg's version of the Munsters theme, a Waylon Jennings cover, etc.....But anyway.....


I like the tune. The doubled vocals are a little off/loose at times, but maybe that's deliberate. Everything seems to be distant and tentative, for lack of a better word. The drums especially sound like an after thought and are very weak. I know a song like this isn't about BIG drums, but they still should sound good and drive a little more, in my opinion. Nice melody and tune. Does have a British feel to it. Reminds me of "Real Love" by the Beatles.

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NotThatBright said:
I keep forgetting how many of you guys are Brits
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New England is in America. :eek:
 
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I would like the acoustic to be a bit more prominent. It has a great sound to it and I think it should be more of the song rather than just an accompaniment instrument.

Nice tune.
 
Vocals sounded a bit weird to me early in the piece, but nothing totally offputting. The harmonies were a bit loose at points too, but like others i suspect that was intentional. Agree with RAMI that the drums could have driven this a bit more, and even though i'm no drummer, i always liked powerful, even dominant drums and percussion so my opinion is totally biased. I didn't really get a 'British' feel from this, the vocals were pretty neutral accent wise to me, but i would have leaned towards USA if i didn't know otherwise. Not the biggest fan of 'folksy' steel string guitar, but still, Cool tune, guitars sounded good. If this clinic is full of rock guitars, isn't that even more reason to post different stuff? :)

By the way there is a New England down here too, a rural district in the state of New South Wales. But then this was once New Holland too, and some would say there's not much new in Australia anyway.
 
There's a lot to like about this song. It does have a retro sound to it, and being of the era, that's fine by me. The "never ever" hook is catchy, and there's a nice relaxed feel to the song.

But, as others have noted, there are areas that you might think about working on.

1 The double tracked vocal is a bit ragged in places, and would benefit from being tightened up.

2 The vocal is a bit 'safe'. It's singing the song, but not a lot more. Maybe you could work in some variation in delivery.

3 The lead guitar is competent, and doing the right things, but sounds hesitant.

4 The drums are perversely too quiet but too busy. I'd be inclined to simplify them and bring them up a bit.

5 By around three minutes I was wanting the song to stop; I'd heard enough. I did last to the end, and the nice surprise with the harmonies there. But why keep a listener waiting four minutes for that?

6 Someone said it sounded a bit like "Real Love". Maybe I didn't get that same sense. However, I think Real Love has some musical elements that you could think about adopting. For example, the instrumentation is pretty much static throughout this song. Maybe there is scope for adding or subtracting things.
 
Thanks for all the comments.
Agreed that the doubled vocals do drift apart in places (its f*cking tough to keep things right on!) I thought the vocals sounded too weak without the doubling, though. I was trying for a mellow soft vocal - lately if I punch the vocals up a notch, I've got an annoyng buzzy rasp - should have quit smoking cigarettes 25 years ago, not 13 years ago.
I should probably retrack the lead guitar part - I think that was the second take.

NotThatBright - it's a Taylor dreadnought acoustic, so, yeah it can be bright. :) I didn't EQ it at all.
Rami - have to admit I don't know that Beatles tune, but someone mentioned a 'Peter & Gordon' sound on my early demo of this.
Greg - yeah, I've got a bunch of electrics, nothing against them, this song just happened to be all acoustic.
DM60 - there are two acoustic takes on this, panned way left and way right (but not 100%). Possibly taking some low mids out via EQ, I could boost their volumes up a bit.
Gecko - can definitely simplify and boost the drums (advantage of EZD2, no retracking needed!) I don't know how the song ended up at over 4 minutes! One method I use for shortening songs is to take out a chorus, (but there's only 3 in this song), but not sure it owuld work well to take out chorus 2 before the bridge.

Thanks for all the listens and suggestions.
 
I liked the tune. Good lyric. The vocals need a little work as has already been said. Ditto on drums. It's still a nice upbeat track with a great vibe to it as is.
Good song
 
mjbphotos said:
Retracked some stuff, remixed based on suggestions posted here, thanks

This is a song I've been working on with songwriting help from the Muse website.
Click to expand...

The mix: It feels a bit light, as if a bit more body might help, like the highpass filters might be lowered a bit. The backing vocal's getting really lost - either it needs a bit more separation or a bit more volume.

The arrangement: It goes on a bit too long - it would work just as well with one less verse/chorus. The only development in the tune is that nice choral group at the end.
 
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