My first song in 7 years

[Strat1958]

Broke a writer's block and forced myself to write!

Recorded last weekend in Garageband.

Palm Trees and Eighty Degrees

I am playing all instruments and all vocals are mine as well.

Equipment:
Supro Sahara electric through a phaser pedal.
Journey carbon fiber acoustic.
Fender Jazz Bass.
M-Audio midi keyboard.
Shure SM-58 mic.
Focusrite Scarlett Solo USB interface.
TC Helicon Harmonizer.
Garageband on a Macbook Pro.

 

[9xSound]

Buried in the dark halls of musician forums like this one, you can find some pretty cool stuff sometimes that other people haven't heard before. Palm Trees and Eighty Degrees fits this description. I like your voice and the mellow, dreamy flow. Catchy hooks and pleasant melody. Good job keeping the vibe subdued and restrained. Man, that's an easy thing to eff up! No issues with the mix, as far as I'm concerned. I like it just like it is. It works. The lift before the chorus with the diminished chords kind of threw me at first, but it grew on me after a couple of listens. Great tune, man. I like it a lot. If I were to do anything different besides add a scorching lead guitar solo that it didn't need, I would shorten the title to just Palm Trees. It's more natural and the addition of "And Eighty Degrees" feels like a mouthful. But great song. A good find for those who prowl the dark halls.

 

[Strat1958]

Buried in the dark halls of musician forums like this one, you can find some pretty cool stuff sometimes that other people haven't heard before. Palm Trees and Eighty Degrees fits this description. I like your voice and the mellow, dreamy flow. Catchy hooks and pleasant melody. Good job keeping the vibe subdued and restrained. Man, that's an easy thing to eff up! No issues with the mix, as far as I'm concerned. I like it just like it is. It works. The lift before the chorus with the diminished chords kind of threw me at first, but it grew on me after a couple of listens. Great tune, man. I like it a lot. If I were to do anything different besides add a scorching lead guitar solo that it didn't need, I would shorten the title to just Palm Trees. It's more natural and the addition of "And Eighty Degrees" feels like a mouthful. But great song. A good find for those who prowl the dark halls.

Wow, thank you so much! I like your idea of shortening the title, and will probably do that. Once again, thank you for the kind comments.

 

[Armistice]

Without importing into my DAW and listening on decent speakers, I'd say the acoustic guitar is brittle and needs re-recording, or if that's not feasible, take some of the highs out of it - go hunting with the EQ to find that dominant frequency and tame it a little. It's not a good sound. Let the strings rust a bit and move your mic, if you used a mic. It's just bright and harsh as it is.

Whatever that sound is that plays the melody at the start, you almost get away with it - sort of sax like - until 13 seconds until the modulation comes in and then it's not good and sounds like a $50 Casio keyboard with your hand on the modulation wand to the left. At the end too.

I think there's a build up in the low mids that's worth checking out.

And I'd completely disagree with the previous poster's recommendation on the title. The only reason I listened was that the title was interesting. "Palm Trees" is just anodyne. Don't do it.

I'm sorry - you probably would have preferred to hear what a great song it was, and maybe it is, but you need to work on the recording / mixing to realise its potential. It's good you've got out of your writing rut, but I think you need to go back and do some work on it. I appreciate that forthright comment isn't particular in mode around here these days, but trust me on this.

 

[Strat1958]

Without importing into my DAW and listening on decent speakers, I'd say the acoustic guitar is brittle and needs re-recording, or if that's not feasible, take some of the highs out of it - go hunting with the EQ to find that dominant frequency and tame it a little. It's not a good sound. Let the strings rust a bit and move your mic, if you used a mic. It's just bright and harsh as it is.

Whatever that sound is that plays the melody at the start, you almost get away with it - sort of sax like - until 13 seconds until the modulation comes in and then it's not good and sounds like a $50 Casio keyboard with your hand on the modulation wand to the left. At the end too.

I think there's a build up in the low mids that's worth checking out.

And I'd completely disagree with the previous poster's recommendation on the title. The only reason I listened was that the title was interesting. "Palm Trees" is just anodyne. Don't do it.

I'm sorry - you probably would have preferred to hear what a great song it was, and maybe it is, but you need to work on the recording / mixing to realise its potential. It's good you've got out of your writing rut, but I think you need to go back and do some work on it. I appreciate that forthright comment isn't particular in mode around here these days, but trust me on this.

I appreciate all of these comments and will use them to improve - thank you Armistice.

The acoustic was DI'd, I know now I should have mic'd it. I will go back and re-record the rhythm guitar.

You nailed it on the sax part. The second riff (no modulation) sounds much better than the first and last. Will re-record that as well.

Again, thank you. I'm sure it will be better next time!

 

[VomitHatSteve]

First thing that leaps out to me is that those bongos (or whatever hand percussion on the right) are very buried.
Conversely, the acoustic on the far left is very pronounced. It sounds like you might have a second, quieter acoustic closer to the center? Maybe make those two pretty close in volume and pan them opposite each other?

Song's pretty good. I agree with Armi that the longer song title is more interesting then a short one would've been. From that perspective, you're in a good place and just need to work on the recording part of it, I'd say.

So is the saxophone a synth then? Some of the transients, and the held note at the end of the line don't sound quite natural.

 

[bainmack]

dope!

 

[Strat1958]

First thing that leaps out to me is that those bongos (or whatever hand percussion on the right) are very buried.
Conversely, the acoustic on the far left is very pronounced. It sounds like you might have a second, quieter acoustic closer to the center? Maybe make those two pretty close in volume and pan them opposite each other?

Song's pretty good. I agree with Armi that the longer song title is more interesting then a short one would've been. From that perspective, you're in a good place and just need to work on the recording part of it, I'd say.

So is the saxophone a synth then? Some of the transients, and the held note at the end of the line don't sound quite natural.

Hi VHS, thanks for the feedback. Yes, the bongos are buried...I was concerned about having them too pronounced...maybe I can bump them up a dB or so.

The acoustic is pretty far left, that was to balance the phased electric that comes in later on the right. I realize now I should have panned the acoustic closer to center during verse 1, then panned it left when the 2nd guitar comes in on the right. Rookie mistake!

And yeah, the sax is midi. I definitely need to redo that. I'm glad you think the song is good, I really appreciate that, man - thanks.

 

[9xSound]

Buried in the dark halls of musician forums like this one, you can often find musicians nitpicking each other's mixes. Haha! And I love it. Yeah, I agree with the previous poster that the bongos could come forward a little. Otherwise, my harsh is your sweet spot. PT&ED is a good, solid tune on a visceral listening level. I've listened to it five times now and I've enjoyed it every time. It holds up on replay — and that's a sure sign that you really got something right. Rock on, my man.

 

[Strat1958]

Buried in the dark halls of musician forums like this one, you can often find musicians nitpicking each other's mixes. Haha! And I love it. Yeah, I agree with the previous poster that the bongos could come forward a little. Otherwise, my harsh is your sweet spot. PT&ED is a good, solid tune on a visceral listening level. I've listened to it five times now and I've enjoyed it every time. It holds up on replay — and that's a sure sign that you really got something right. Rock on, my man.

Thank you brother. I really appreciate your comments.

 

[Strat1958]

OK guys, based on your feedback, I made a couple of changes.

1. I EQ'd the harshness out of the acoustic guitar.
2. I moved acoustic to center during the 1st verse, then panned more left at the 1st chorus, when the electric comes in on the right.
3. Significantly reduced the vibrato on the sax part at the end of the opening riff.
4. Added 1 dB to the bongos.

Hopefully a better mix now!

Link is below...