Mixing, moving and maintaining attention.

theron

New member
In short,

The song is called "Dying on the Vine". A simple picking progession that I build upon with what I had at my disposal.

I mixed it so I know the mix can be improved. I don't know how.
I wrote and recorded it so I know it moves me. Does it do anything for you?

I can play it and enjoy the sucker all the way through. Does it capture and/or keep your attention or does it turn stale?

Thanks for any and all comments and tips to make the song better. "Dying on the Vine"

http://www.nowhereradio.com/theron/singles
 
hey theron....

first, I like the tune....I like the mood and the lyrics.....the drums sound better on this one too....

Here's the things that I'm not crazy about.....the vocal doubling.....IMOP this could be a lot better without the constant doubling..I think that at certain points it would sound better with one good vocal track.....like after you say 'No more dying on the vine' that's cool but then the 'waiting for what's behind' is out of key..(I think)...... Keep in mind you already know I am not that good of a singer so take that with a ton of salt.... There are certain parts that sound really good but that 'waiting for what's behind' part sounds off to me...mainly just the 'behind' word.....I do like the song as I am on my fifth straight listen.......I wouldn't have minded a little solo somewhere but that's just preference I'm sure.....I like your voice but almost every time in the song when you say 'waiting for what's behind' it doesn't sound right to me...I think the song is a good one and the guitar sound is good.....When it gets heavy..IMOP it almost sounds like it wants to get a little 'meaner' but you don't let it and you keep it restrained ..................................I like the scream!!!!

I would say the song is a good one and would be better with some vocal retakes....that's just my first impression after hearing it five times now....I will comment more in a few minutes after I twist a fatty...things always sound different after that.....

I like the tune:cool:
 
nice song, I agree with a few of the previous mentioned vocal remarks, but I also like the differences in both. It works at some points and not at others. I didn't care as much for the guitar sound when it kicked in to the heavier part. Maybe try a bigger guitar sound there. I enjoyed the song. I listened to 'Bed of Discontent' and found it pleasing as well.
 
good song but the vocals are off key in a few spots. and when you have more then one out of key vocal going it can get distracting if they're not exactly the same and not exactly a hamony and not quite an octave. Our singer has the same problem but we keep him because we mostly play live and he's the only one singing when we do. That means he'll usually sound good. you have a decent enough voice but could use some polishing. Maybe lower the multi vocal parts???? the song needs some attention but could become quite catchy. I agree that the lyrics are very good.
 
B,
thanks for the time. I was way off on what I thought was the weakness of the song. I cut the two lead vocals and listened back solo on both. I think I will recut the one that causes a cringing grimace and try and blend the new vocal a tad better. It is hard to sing the exact same throughout the whole song but, I like the "natural chorus" theme so I'm gonna try it minus bad vocals. I really was convinced that I sang ok on this one!?! What do I know.
Mr W. is it a matter of tone on the git that you don't like? Any suggestions on how to gain this "bigger sound"? All I do is mic the amp ( a peavy classic 30 in this instance), play, and pan to my liking. Any way to improve on this would be great.
bmf, thanks for the listen. As stated above, I will address my errant vox tracks and forever prove that I can fake a good vocal when the moon is right(ha, ha). Glad you took the time to chime in and offer some much needed advice.

Peace and post more

Theron.
 
yes...you do make your riff interesting. When you recut your vocals, watch the popping on the mic too...
For some reason, I like your snare sound.
 
thanks for answering one of the questions Mxmkr. I will extrapilate from your "when you recut the vocal" comment that you think the vox is sung out of tune as well. The snare is just part of a common loop that I sliced, diced and effected. It is encouraging that YOU think the song maintains.

I just listened again. Is the entire vox track sour or is it just the underlying main vox. Is it the falsetto vox on the right? I truely find myself audio blind on this. I wouldn't post a song that was so egregiously out of tune and now I can't hear the culprit. Please shatter my centric ears!
Theron.
 
Cool tune.

Could stand more drums in the mix - not a bad snare sample, in fact the drums on the whole don't sound as canned as a lot of the tunes here. A slightly gated reverb on the snare may carry it a bit further along.

I don't dig the falsetto vox on the right channel.

I'm not a big fan of the extreme L-R panning technique.

Dig the scream... that's cool

The main problem with the vox being off key is the line "waiting for what's behind." In nearly every instance it's almost as if you're not sure of which note you're heading to. Take your guitar or a keyboard and pick the notes out that you're going for, practice the phrase and nail it - you nearly had it a couple of times near the end.

Double tracking the vocals... I used to do that for some tunes. It's easier all the way around if you can add a doubling delay to a well recorded take, you get nearly the same effect and save time in the process... just an idea. :)

Again, cool tune.
 
hey theron,

I want to make sure that you know the song is good and doesn't get stale like you asked...I have listened to it quite a few times now and oddly enough, I don't really miss a solo because of the amount of change.....the things that I'm not crazy about are minor and could also be preference... I did notice the vocal pops in the beginning, but figured it was known....I was hoping mixmkr was going to elaborate more...

At some points in this song you sound like the singer for the 'Red Hot Chili Peppers.' The things that sound out could be a matter of preference maybe.....listen to some of the mellower 'Chili Peppers' because I really think you sound like him on their mellower songs and although you may not like the band, you could get some ideas for vocal textures I think.........I don't know if your understanding me here but I think the song is good enough for me to give you all the thoughts I had about it....

later
 
Jitteringjim. That is the pinpoint I was looking for. I like singing this tune so it will be fun to try and nail it. You are correct in the intution that I didn't have preset notes to hit. I just sang on all parts. I think I can do without the falsetto as well but, I was trying to go for a distinct alternative vocal track. I only have one mediocre voice so, I gave it up. Oh well, I tried one aproach. Thanks much for the specifics!!
B. your elaboration is kind. I was wondering what you'd think of this tune in light of my acoustic and folkish flavor of posted tunes. I think I'll clean up the main vox and try a "mean/pissed off"attack in place of the falsetto vox. What do you think of the distortion git in the chorus? I know in terms of your set up it is a wuss track but, how does it sound to your spoiled ears?

dtb, "man" What in the hell?



Thanks for all the time and thoughts.
I like this song and would love to hash it out untill it sits.

Theron.
 
I really like this song man, it puts me in kind of a mellow, I wanna smoke-up frame of mind. Everyone's already made the suggestions I thought of, , so I'll just sit back and listen to this a few more times.
 
theron said:
What do you think of the distortion git in the chorus?
Thanks for all the time and thoughts.
I like this song and would love to hash it out untill it sits.
Theron.

hey theron, it's me again....the guy who cant get his own music in order but still thinks he can offer advice to people who are smarter and more equipped to give advice to ME.:D

I think I like the sound of the electric though I know this could be agrued by some....My reason for liking it is that it doesn't sound like a processor or direct...it sounds 'real'......like a small combo amp that is just being played without the "smoke and mirrors' someone like myself would hide behind......In fact....I think that would be the reason why I like your songs....because they seem real to me......I think this song could be sssssooooooo much better with some attention......In the chorus, I probably would have used a 'bigger' guitar sound but I don't think you should.....I think it works well...maybe a little more gain may have done it for me comletely but I generally like the 'realness' of it....IMOP, the problems with this song are mainly some vocal parts....but let us not forget that I am not a 'real' singer and my thoughts are being typed as I listen... the idea of this song oozzes coolness.....that's a fact......

I'll babble some more later......just know that every time I'm posting on this thread, I have the song playing....

I REALLY like the scream!!! and also the end reverb 'thunder' of a real amp being moved abruptly.....it works well to me....

later:cool:
 
B, thanks for the git comments. The track was played through a blues deluxe and I had the OD cranked. I opted not to add a peddle. You've a good ear (more evolved than mine) and I appreciate your time.

sonneylarson,
thanks for the listen. Glad to give you some backround bud music. If you burn enough to make my vox sound in tune, send me the specs for the dosage. Maybe I'll take that route instead of trying to sing in tune.<smiles and sighs>.

Theron.
 
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