Lost At Sea again...

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Jags

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Okay, eventually managed to get around working on the mix of 'Lost At Sea' based on what you had to say a few weeks ago. Don't know if any of you will remember it!

www.ampcast.com/jags

Things i can remember changing...

Worked on the panning, hopefully it's a little more blanced now. Brought up the lead vocals in all but the intro (maybe too much?). Turned down the snare, brought up the bass drum a bit, although I'm not sure if it can be heard enough when everything else kicks in? Removed a bit of backing vox that didn't seem to fit. Also did some more subtle things with the EQ (something i wish i knew more about) to try and give the tracks more room, probably unsuccessfully! Think that's about it. Didn't retrack the bass, thought that it was bearable for the moment.


Anyhow, it's open for your critique. :)

Thanks

Jags
 
I didn't hear the previous version.

good:

This a great song. Very nice songwriting. Great vocal melodies. Sounds like real drums - 10 bonus points. Did you overdub the hi-hat? Throws me a bit at the end. EDIT - notice you say it's computerized drums, I'm going deaf.

The instrumentation is great.

I like the disonance on the keyboards. The backup vocals are great.

bad:

- Some pitch problems here and there on the vocals. Not real bad, but noticable. Mainly on the notes you hold during the chorus. Most of it is dead on, good singing.

- Drums at the start lose timing, but settle in pretty good for the rest of the song.

suggestions:

- Bring the guitars up and get some more stereo image going with them, more panning.
- When the drums kick in, you need something else to reinforce - sounds empty. I hear something in the background as it currently is - sounds like picking electric guitar or something, whatever it is, bring it up a bit.

I could hear an acoustic strumming away in this, but I hear that in everything :)

Good stuff! Really like this tune.
 
I remember the first version and this is much better. I agree with Emeric that the kybrd parts are way cool. He's also correct that the guitar parts need to come up and do some panning. During the verses it sounds kinda empty...no real body to it, and bringing up the gits might help fill that in.
Vocals aren't too loud as far as I'm concerned but they might could use some kind of "spacey" reverb of some kind. Maybe not....just something to try and see what it sounds like. It's still a good tune.
Ya' know....you might want to experiment with some nature sounds (like waves crashing on the shore) to fill up those verses.
 
Cool opening....like those reverbed guitars---it seems like the whole atmosphere shrunk when the bass and drums came in.....Using synth drums you should be able to get better sounding drums than that no???? Singing is real good--like the piano part....I couldnt hear the background vocals too well-sounds like they were doin some nice stuff---Really good song overall---very original-I can't think of anything it sounds like-and I've heard alot of stuff---
 
Cool song! Kind of had a bit of a Beatle vibe to it. I like the structure of the song.

I thought the vocals may come up just a tad overall. There were a few intonation problems with the chorus (but, of course, I am the king of intonation so there you go...)

I like the overall vibe of this song! Great job overall!
 
Hey,

I liked your writting alot!! Nice vox. The delivery and feel remindes me a bit of Moressey(sp?). I don't like his stuff but, for some indesernable reason, I like yours:confused: :)

I think you could do more with the bass without recutting it. It sounds to snappy (not slappy, mind you) and crisp. It needs mellowing and rounding. Try some warm verb and maybe even chorus on it.

The acousitic git is there but, I'd give it more of a say in the voice of things.

I liked the sound of your voice and the sound of your vox track.

A wider stereo field would do well to swell the sea of this song.

Hope that helps some,

Theron.
 
Jags, I remember the first version, and you've definitely improved it. I can hear the vocal much better, overall quality of the entire track is better. Cool song. Just listen to the advice of the mix crew above, they will help steer this ship in the right direction.
Good work, my friend.

Mark
 
Still sounds great to me!

I agree with warming it up like Theron said.

Really nice vocals,and the guitars are just great.

You lost the acoustic guitar at 2.09,I can barely hear it,don't know if that was intentional or not?

I dig that little piano thing,really makes the song.

Nice stuff.

Best to you,
Pete
 
Hi "Jags":

This is the first of yours that I've heard. Very ethereal. It's so unique that I can't really offer anything concrete that might be even marginally helpful, so I'll just say what's on my mind. Cool use of instruments...there are a lot of sounds in here, but it doesn't ever get cluttered. I have no idea what the song's about, but that's fine because it's more of a vibe...a good one. In fact, I've been a Pink Floyd fan since early childhood, and I can't tell you one blessed subject they ever wrote about. I've listened about 5 or 6 times, and I have only one thing of any substance that sticks out. There is no way in HELL that the piano line you're playing should work on this song...but it really does. In my book, that alone makes the song very cool.

Thanks for this...will listen to others for fun,
-chris
 
I really liked your "style". This kind of stuff is easy on the ears. The beginning was nice; sets the mood right away, then flows nicely into the rest of the song.

I liked the piano thing at about 1:30 that repeats through the other verses. Just slightly dissonant. But in the next section it was distracting, like there was too much going on with the background vocals in there too.

There was something bugging me about the bass line. Like I wanted to hear a minor when it was staying in a major, I'm not quite sure..... but I do like the overall bass pattern. This of course is just a matter of personal taste, and what you're hearing in your head as you write.


Twist
 
I kind of remember the first version. And I think this mix is much better. I think the vocals sit just about right. On cheap headphones the bass sounds nice - good speakers might be another story. Good feel to the song.

For some reason I want harmonies on the "See me. Teach me." lines. Pretty decent harmonies elsewhere though.

Still love that little piano walkdown. Cool touch.

Still a few notes that hit with a thud and a pitch issue here or there. When the vocal parts all come together near the end they get a little mashed together.

EQing sucks doesn't it? As an exercise, try EQing by only making cuts - NO boosts (ok maybe just bass and kick drum). I did that recently and it was a considerable help.

Later...
 
hm... interesting song... you have good fresh ideas that would work with beter execution... like that minor piano thing...

the chorus and the end gets kind of "cakaphonic" (if that's the right word) but seems to be intentionaly so... I dunno... it might work actualy but I don't know if that "offnes" is intentional.... oh, wait it's that "recorder" type sound that's off ... hm... like I said it might actualy work in a wierd way but did you want it that way ?... :)

defenatly interesting piece... oh ye I like the groove too...
cheers
 
This is so much better than the first mix. When I first heard this, it didn't do anything for me, but I really like this version.

Good writing, and some very nice harmony ideas. Love the piano, and it's good to hear the recorder take its rightful place in the rock and roll armoury. Or something ;)

Things I would change - the guitar playing the "on the beat" rhythm stuff, and doing picking stuff later, is a bit too bright - I'd try cutting a bit of midrange to tone it down.

Maybe cut a wee bit of low/mid on the vocal, during the intro? Or take a wee bit of low end off the reverb (again just during the intro)?

Give the bass a bit more body or warmth and a bit less attack. I like the bassline itself though.

Acoustic guitar sounds nice - make more of it.

Have you compressed the vocal? Some of the starts of lines kind of "jump out" at you, so maybe a wee bit (more) compression? But what do I know? (Hint - not much)

Was that a banjo around 2:30?? Or am I going mad?

Cool track - I like it.

Cheers

Alastair
 
I remember this tune and I liked it then.. I love the dark piano stuff and the additives..



someone mentioned it getting smaller when the drums come in and I agree.. also some notes clashing a bit, but it's still a very good original tune..
 
here goes...

emeric - the drums are actually the real thing, just recorded in a very awkward single microphone recording each part in turn fashion! There is also quite a lot of tweaking that needed to be done as i find it difficult to play seperate parts in time, obviously not tweaked to perfection though! I think i was getting tired when recording the vocals for the last chorus, and also trying to keep my voice down a bit to try and not sound too stupid to the family and neighbours! will retrack. Thanks for the advice, i'll definitely try to find something to fill the emptiness during the verses, i know what you mean.

lt. bob - thanks for the advice and ideas, nature sounds thing might be a good idea, dunno. I'll try stuff out.

stratomaster - they are real drums, and a very cheap set at that, so getting it to sound good is difficult! i'll have to make do for now, at least it's better than recording the whole thing live with one carefully positioned mic, although that could give a beatlesy effect?! I'm pleased with your orignality comment, something i do my best to at least approach.

boydrj - wow, i almost had a link there to the last reply with the beatles stuff! thanks, glad you liked the vibe, intonation probs will be worked on.

theron - thanks, like the smith's, not heard much of his solo stuff but interesting to hear your comparison. tips taken on board!

mkg - thanks, glad to hear my work wasn't entirely in vain!

muzeman - yeah, i did cut out the acoustic guitar for the bridge section to give more precedence to the piano bit, not sure if it was necessary, but it looks like bringing the acoustic up a bit might be a good idea anyway.

chrisharris - thanks a lot, i'm not entirely sure what it's about myself ;). your comments are appreciated!

twist - thanks, this is the most upbeat song i've produced so far, i can see where you're coming from with the minor bass thing, in any other mood i no doubt would have come up with a more peter hook style bass line!

triplem - might think about extra harmonies there, thanks for the eq tip. will work on getting the vocals better. thanks again.

fed - thanks, glad you like the groove! The whole 'offness' feel at the end is intentional (save for the pitch/intonation problems with the vox) to add a bit of sway and disorder. Don't know about the recorder, maybe it is out of tune? The structure of it is meant though! not to everyone's taste i know! Cheers for listening.

alibish - thanks, i'm surpised to hear that it's changed that much to you! Have to agree, to me, no song is complete without a bit of the old recorder... actually that leaves a lot of incomplete songs, but hey! advice much appreciated, although i reckon you must be going mad... no banjos involved! can't think what you're hearing there, need to give it a listen.

b.sabbath - thanks for your time, not sure what to do about the drums, i'll look into addressing that since a few of you have picked up on it.

Once again, thanks for listening everyone. A lot of stuff to work on, look forward to putting your advice into practice!

Cheers

Jags
 
Jags, I heard the original. I'm late coming in and I have a lot to listen to, so I can't read other responses....sorry if I repeat.

Vocals sound more balanced than before. Good job there. Words are more clear. Those stereo issues on seem to be resolved for the most part.

I'm still feeling the bass could be mixed better...and more consistant in terms of level.

Other than that, I hear a big improvement. The feel of the song itself is clearer.
 
Thanks sluice, i'm going to work on the bass. Glad to hear the vocals are better, I think i might have a go at manually trying to reduced some of the silibance which was picked up last time and has become more and more noticeable to me. Thanks again for listening.

Jags
 
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