Jesse Michael Garcia Mix Contest #1

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Cloneboy Studio

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Alright songwriters and tunesmiths, time to take off your thinking caps and put on those duncecaps because it's the JESSE MICHAEL GARCIA MIX CONTEST #1!!!

RULES:

1.) Unlimited entries per songwriter!

2.) Winner is determined by the ability to best capture and reproduce the unique creator vibe in the works of Internet famous Alternative Rock Solo Artist Jesse Michael Garcia from Utah! Original song entries only.

3.) Song lyrics must be about the Alternative Rock Solo Artist Jesse Michael Garcia from Utah; either his life, describing his music and artistry, his viewpoints, or direct quotes!!!

4.) Winner will be determined by public vote during the Thanksgiving Holiday!

5.) The winner will recieve the undying awe and priase of their fellow forumites, and perhaps some rude posts, message threads, private messages, email, phone calls, or an in person visit from JESSE MICHAEL GARCIA himself!!!

6.) Post links to entries here!
 
I just took a dump, and I think it almost comes close to the calibre of "music" Garcia puts out. How does one upload fecal matter?
 
Hrm.... but does the dump have any lyrics?

I was thinking of penning a song, here are some cursory lyrics:

Punch In The Throat

[verse 1]
I am the creator
A unique butterfly
No time for a hater
Non-talents step aside

[chorus]
Yeah, I'm one of the few
Yeah, I'm rocking the boat
Yeah, I'll be bigger than all you
My music will hit you-LIKE A PUNCH IN THE THROAT

[verse 2]
You can feel jealous later
And you can ask why
Time to quote Darth Vader
While HomeRec sighs...

[chorus]
Yeah, I'm one of the few
Yeah, I'm rocking the boat
Yeah, I'll be bigger than all you
My music will hit you-LIKE A PUNCH IN THE THROAT

[bridge]
Strike me in anger and I'll lay down the law
I'm an axe slinging original from the heart of Utah

[chorus]
Yeah, I'm one of the few
Yeah, I'm rocking the boat
Yeah, I'll be bigger than all you
My music will hit you-LIKE A PUNCH IN THE THROAT
 
Garcia's entire thread is a cheap laugh.... so why not?
 
If that ass clown is not an offspring of Father Time, I'll eat myself.
 
Blue Bear Sound said:
Garcia's entire thread is a cheap laugh.... so why not?

Because pointing and laughing for days at everyone who's a cheap laught is, in my opinion, a waste of time, webspace and it's just cheap.
 
Jesse is such a talent! Not only does he play all of the instruments he plays them all at the same time!
http://www.onemanband.org/one_man_band-photo/busker-one-man-band-lg.jpg
Jesse isn't really bald it is just that his head has gotten so big that you can't see his hair. In locker rooms he is often confused for Siamese twins.

Here are some helpful hints to achieve Jesse's signature guitar tone:
1. Always wear a pair of thick rubber gloves
2. Be original, smash your instruments on the stage BEFORE the song
3.Build your own microphones with soup cans and string
4.Always wait until AFTER the BEEP to start recording.
 
Halion said:
Because pointing and laughing for days at everyone who's a cheap laught is, in my opinion, a waste of time, webspace and it's just cheap.
I disagree - he brought it on himself...... he could have shut-the-fuck-up after the handful of first few honest critiques, but he decided instead to try and trash anyone who commented. He asked for it, he got it....
:cool:
 
He probably built himself up to be the funniest troll in the world... like the best trolls they try to 'be themselves' while still trolling, so you get an honest feel for how pathetic they truly are.
 
Hey BB here is my submission. LOL

poop_6.jpg
 
giles117 said:
Hey BB here is my submission. LOL

poop_6.jpg
Wow - you did a great job! That pic made me retch almost about as much as when I heard troll-boy's clips!!!
 
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