I've Gotten Tired Of Playing Music With These Guys

  • Thread starter Thread starter stevieb
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stevieb

Just another guy, really.
I just gotta vent...

My too-big guitar group plays tomorrow (well, later today- Saturday.) I am sure I will enjoy doing the show, but really, I am getting tired of several of those guys. In no particular order, and names left out:

"V" is rather a snob. Whether it's "I prefer to record my navel-gazing, auto-erotic doodling at home," or "I'm just so far ahead of most of you," he frankly is a boor. Oh, sure, he can play, but the guy's got VERY limited people skills. If he were HALF the musical genius he seems to think he is, he MIGHT be tolerable- but, well, he ain't.

"W" is actually better than he once was- was a time the guy rushed the tempo on EVERYTHING. Now, he has to leave at 9 pm SHARP- does he turn into a pumpkin if he stays out too late, or is it a werewolf? He's pulled the diva act a few times, too. In fairness, it's been quite a while, but that sort of thing kinda lingers in one's memory- when will he do it, next? He HAS improved quite a bit- no rushing the tempo anymore, and I find I do enjoy playing harmonica or electric guitar counterpoint to his acoustic guitar or mandolin. Him, I could actually play music with in another project.

"S" (the OTHER S, not me- I am darn near perfect) is VERY irritating. He's the kind to challenge my position of leadership from day one. He does stuff like this: yesterday, I hit the "on" switch for the PA (line conditioner and power amps are on the stage, board and thus volume pots, and CD player at the back of the room in the booth) and the CD player came on- I'd been working alone the previous evening, getting the equipment set up, and had Bruce Springsteen cranked. This guy starts yelling at me to turn it down. I was headed in that direction anyway, and he kept distracting me from doing just that. I finally told him to FUCK OFF and let me take care of it. Geech.

The other "W" is okay- very good jazz guitarist, I just wish he would develop a LITTLE stage presence. I guess he likes to let his guitar "do the talking."

"D" is okay, too- good but rusty jazz drummer. I can tolerate him...

The other "D" is hard to read. I can never (in or out of the group) figure out if he hates me, or is just reserved. It drives me nuts. Maybe I should just ask him, one day.

"B" is border-line spastic, sorta like Joe Cocker, but without the talent.

Collectively, they drove off "N," who has written some decent original stuff. Fortunately, he didn't run off too far- he and I are doing duo colloraboration, with his originals and mine. THAT might go somewhere...

Perhaps the most perplexing thing, though, is the all-too-common trait to ONLY PLAY STUFF THAT'S OLD. I KNOW some good music has been written since 1970- why can't these guys see it?

We take a hiatus for the summer after tomorrow nite- none too soon, IMHO. Maybe I will concentrate on that "Highwaymen" tribute band idea I've been kicking around...
 
You need a t-shirt that says "Wanna Jam?"

Get a couple more for the guys you play well with.
 
if the dudes have to many issues i would look around for a another project.if the new one takes off tell them to get help or give a notice.i find the weirdess attitude is jelousy most of the time.
 
What're you, Buddy Rich? ;)


All kidding aside, I feel you man. Nothing's more annoying than people that can't get along in a creative environment.
 
Aside the one you listed as the drummer, everyone is a guitarist?
 
Man, I needed to vent! I actually thought I didn't post that, thought I changed my mind.

Mostly, I was burned out on the concept and the group, but the show came off great, so now, I am feeling much better.

And hoping none of my buds read that...
 
stevieb said:
I just gotta vent...

My too-big guitar group plays tomorrow (well, later today- Saturday.) I am sure I will enjoy doing the show, but really, I am getting tired of several of those guys. In no particular order, and names left out:

"V" is rather a snob. Whether it's "I prefer to record my navel-gazing, auto-erotic doodling at home," or "I'm just so far ahead of most of you," he frankly is a boor. Oh, sure, he can play, but the guy's got VERY limited people skills. If he were HALF the musical genius he seems to think he is, he MIGHT be tolerable- but, well, he ain't.

"W" is actually better than he once was- was a time the guy rushed the tempo on EVERYTHING. Now, he has to leave at 9 pm SHARP- does he turn into a pumpkin if he stays out too late, or is it a werewolf? He's pulled the diva act a few times, too. In fairness, it's been quite a while, but that sort of thing kinda lingers in one's memory- when will he do it, next? He HAS improved quite a bit- no rushing the tempo anymore, and I find I do enjoy playing harmonica or electric guitar counterpoint to his acoustic guitar or mandolin. Him, I could actually play music with in another project.

"S" (the OTHER S, not me- I am darn near perfect) is VERY irritating. He's the kind to challenge my position of leadership from day one. He does stuff like this: yesterday, I hit the "on" switch for the PA (line conditioner and power amps are on the stage, board and thus volume pots, and CD player at the back of the room in the booth) and the CD player came on- I'd been working alone the previous evening, getting the equipment set up, and had Bruce Springsteen cranked. This guy starts yelling at me to turn it down. I was headed in that direction anyway, and he kept distracting me from doing just that. I finally told him to FUCK OFF and let me take care of it. Geech.

The other "W" is okay- very good jazz guitarist, I just wish he would develop a LITTLE stage presence. I guess he likes to let his guitar "do the talking."

"D" is okay, too- good but rusty jazz drummer. I can tolerate him...

The other "D" is hard to read. I can never (in or out of the group) figure out if he hates me, or is just reserved. It drives me nuts. Maybe I should just ask him, one day.

"B" is border-line spastic, sorta like Joe Cocker, but without the talent.

Collectively, they drove off "N," who has written some decent original stuff. Fortunately, he didn't run off too far- he and I are doing duo colloraboration, with his originals and mine. THAT might go somewhere...

Perhaps the most perplexing thing, though, is the all-too-common trait to ONLY PLAY STUFF THAT'S OLD. I KNOW some good music has been written since 1970- why can't these guys see it?

We take a hiatus for the summer after tomorrow nite- none too soon, IMHO. Maybe I will concentrate on that "Highwaymen" tribute band idea I've been kicking around...
Click to expand...

Glom onto "N", woodshed with his originals for a while, then pick the best ensemble to flesh out his material. Keep playing with the others to keep your chops up and your rocks off until the original project has legs, then jump ship. In the meantime, let the irritating stuff roll off your back and keep smiling.
 
Gordon, N and I are pretty tight, already.
 
Musicians are a messed up bunch of people, speaking in sweeping general terms. (Obviously I'm perfect :rolleyes: but for some reason I quit every band I've been in, except the two I'm in right now and I'll quit one of those at any minute.)

Are you making any money or does the band have any upward trajectory? (Is there a reason for playing with these guys other than fun/hobby/occasional gigs?)
 
This is a for-fun group- little upward mobility, but I knew that was likely to happen when I started it. I WAS expecting more musiciality- which is a funny thing, as some of the members whom I though were very limited in their musiciality have grown considerably, whereas others who were already pretty well along seem to be stuck at that point.

What I get out of it includes these things (in no particular order):

1. A reminder that if I want a group to go in a well-defined direction, I need to take pains to communicate that vision to the members, and hold them to a promise that they are on-board with that vision;

2. A chance to hone my own chops;

3. A chance to get more adventerous in my playing;

(2 and 3 mean I am a much better harmonica and guitar player than I was when I started the group)

4. The means to develop my stage presence, and develop a bit of "attitude" on stage (Saturday, I was far and away the most outrageous performer. I wore a tartan kilt, black shirt, and boots- also wore a Prince Charlie until it got too hot about half way thru each set. My GF told me, after the show, that a couple of the other guys were rolling their eyes when I stepped into the limelight for my leads. Hey, like the man said: "If you wanna make a living, you gotta put on a good show.");

5. Experience in what it's REALLY like to lead a volunteer group. Trust me on this one: it's NOTHING like leading a group of people who get paid for their time/talent;

6. A way to give back to the UU church I am a member of, which hosts us;

7. The means to provide some middle-aged guys a chance to realize their "rock-n-roll fantasies-" at least one or two of these guys have clearly never really been on stage before, and you can tell they are in hog-heaven (even if they tend to forget who brung them...), and;

7. A chance to roll my own eyes, on occasion.


Now, thanks for the advise, here- it is appreciated and duly considered, but really, all I wanted to do was vent.
 
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