I Am An American

  • Thread starter Thread starter Irwin abrigo
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Irwin abrigo

Irwin abrigo

Active member
This is the rewrite (ROCK SONG)

I AM AN AMERICAN

© 2006 Irwin Abrigo

In God we trust
And to bless this land
our country America
land of the brave

we have champions with victories
music with sweet melodies
and I’m so proud to say
I am an American


American's help me sing this song
let us come together love is that we need
to guide and protect us all
our nation is strong, we are the world (I am an American Citizen)
(Repeat)


In the white house
sits our president
From dawn to dusk we all work hard
traveling from State to State

we have the Status of Liberty
we're the land of the free
and I know that I
am not in a dream


Americans help me sing this song
let us come together love is that we need
to guid and protect us all
our nation is strong, we ar the world (I am an American Citizen)
(Repeat)



I don’t have to wonder
with my heart I surrender
I’m giving all my labour
to my country America
I am an American Citizen I am an American (Repeat)


Americans help me sing this song
let us come together love is that we need
to guid and protect us all
our nation is strong, we ar the world (I am an American Citizen)
(Repeat)

© 2006 Irwin Abrigo
all rights reserve
 
uhhh......no. I mean, patriotism is great, but I don't like the song at all. Maybe if it was a country song. Or a song meant for little children thats supposed to cheesy sounding, but for a rock song, no way.I hate it.
 
Irwin,
Subject matter aside I can't catch the metre or the rhyme of this piece.
Hopefully you can work on it.
To be honest I thought it was satirical.
 
Newbie dude said:
uhhh......no. I mean, patriotism is great, but I don't like the song at all. Maybe if it was a country song. Or a song meant for little children thats supposed to cheesy sounding, but for a rock song, no way.I hate it.
Click to expand...


Newbie dude ,

How are you, I like the way you put this over "not a rock, patriotism is great, but not a rock song". Maybe I will have to look at this song a fee times more and do some thinking.

Thanks so much.

Irwin Abrigo
 
rayC,

I know that the metre and the rhyme would matter alot and persons would like to see that in place ,but if you are asongwriter yourself you would understand that you cannot put them in place everytime. This song sing good sounds good. I am working on the demo and as soon as it is done i will let you guys have a listen, ok.

Thank you.

Irwin Abrigo
 
Maybe this will "taste" and sit well in the US. Reading it I find it too "over-patriotic" and it gives me a bad "taste" of the lyrics. But hey - I´m a north-european.
Looking forward to hear it and give an overall feedback.
 
Hey Irwin

hey man I get the impression you're not American by birth? Or are you a non national? I just get that vibe, I could be wrong. Either way, its a refreshing take on Americanism, considering certain current events. Either way, I think you could work the song into something a little more credible....Its a good diea, but you just have to approach it right. I think you should listen to some of these songs

John Walker Blues - Steve Earle
Land of hope and Dreams - Bruce Springsteen
41 Shots - Bruce Springsteen
Born in the USA - Bruce Springsteen
 
Sorry but it sounds like something that John Ashcroft-former Attorney General and total wacko, would write! Too positive for this time I think, the rose colored glasses need to come off!
 
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