Guitar?

Dock it's paycheck.
That doesn't work......fire the lazy SOB.
 
applesmasher said:
How do i get the guitar to work?
Click to expand...
Take a guitar cable and plug one end into the guitar jack..... then take the other end and plug it directly into your ear... you have to do it in a fast swift motion, otherwise you won't get a good connection.

Play, and enjoy!


If you want to record it, just stick a mic in front of your mouth - that's where the sound comes from...... (and you can sing at the same time - cool, eh?!










:rolleyes:
 
I feel that I can give some pretty good advice on the subject. My mentor taught me some very important things about how to get a guitar to work. The first thing you want to do is get your guitar real clean. Try soaking your guitar in lukewarm water for about 45 minutes; I use my tub for this with a water temp of about 92f. This removes a lot of the dirt and dust from the instrument, which will allow it to resonate better. Some people recommend that you boil your strings, but I have found that the better method is to bake them at about 350 for around 17 minutes; this will give your guitar a much crisper sound. Finally you must tune the instrument properly. Make sure that all of the tuners are in line with the headstock; out of line tuners can give you a bad sound.

Hope this helps.
:D
 
All of these are good ideas, but won't produce the best sound. You want to use the patented "impact" method for getting your guitar to work.

Simply pick it up, throw it in the air, and stand under it. When it comes down, you'll hear that patented "impact" tone!
 
It's best to fill that metal hole that's usually found on the side or top with rubber cement or a wooden dowel. This is where all the sound escapes! If it's filled properly you're going to have a truly "self-contained sound" emanating within the body of the guitar, not outside the body.
 
applesmasher said:
How do i get the guitar to work?
Click to expand...

every night before you put it to bed, read a chapter of 'mel bay for idiots' to it. if it doesn't start working in a couple weeks do a townsend smash up number on it, set it on fire like hendrix, dust yourself off and just walk away.
 
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