Got Jokes?

  • Thread starter Thread starter RezN8
  • Start date Start date
RezN8

RezN8

Blick-um, blick-um...
Starting a joke a thread. Please help by adding your favorites. These are mine:

What do you call a drummer who broke up with his girlfriend?
Homeless.

How do you make the drummer's car more aerodynamic?
Take the pizza sign off.

How do you know when the stage is level?
The drummer drools out of both sides of his mouth.

:D Cheers, Rez
 
How many drummers does it take to change a lightbulb?


4!...One to change it and three to talk about how Neil Peart would have done it better.
 
What do you call a guy who hangs around musicians?

A drummer.

[rimshot]
 
An accordian player was on his way home from Oktoberfest when he realized he should stop at the store. All the supermarkets were closed as it was late at night. He saw a liquor store that was open and decided to stop there.

It was a seedy neighborhood and since his precious accordian was sitting out in the open in his back seat, he was sure to lock his car and set the alarm.

While he was in the liquor store, paying for his goods, there was a loud smash and a car alarm began to squeel. He ran outside and sure enough, it was his car that had been broken into.

He ran over to the car to find the back window had been completely smashed in!

Worried about his accordian he immediately poked his head through the gaping hole where the window used to be, only to find that there were now TWO accordians in the back seat!
 
Two girls are walking along when they hear...
"Psst! Down here!"

They both look down and see a frog sitting beside the road. The frog says to them, "Hey, if you kiss me I'll turn into a world famous drummer and make you both rich and famous!" The two girls looked at each other, and one of them reached down and grabbed the frog and stuffed it in her pocket.

The other girl said, "What did you do that for?"

The first replied, "I'm not stupid. I know a talking frog is worth heaps more than a famous drummer any day!!!"
 
PhilGood said:
How many drummers does it take to change a lightbulb?


4!...One to change it and three to talk about how Neil Peart would have done it better.
Click to expand...

Two variation of that joke:

How many drummers does it take to change a light bulb?
One drummer and a roadie.

How many guitarists does it take to chance a light bulb?

100. One to change the bulb, the rest to stand around and say "I could do it better"... "Jimi would've done it like this..." etc.
 
RezN8 said:
Two variation of that joke:

How many drummers does it take to change a light bulb?
One drummer and a roadie.

How many guitarists does it take to chance a light bulb?

100. One to change the bulb, the rest to stand around and say "I could do it better"... "Jimi would've done it like this..." etc.
Click to expand...


HAHAHAHA!!! Me like!
:)
 
How many lead guitarists does it take to change a light bulb?


None--they just steal somebody else's light.
 
most of my aim away messages are musicin jk;s

How many guitar players does it take to cover a Stevie Ray Vaughn tune?
Evidently all of them.


Did you hear about the bass player that threw the drummer out of the band?
Seems the drummer de-tuned one of the strings, and wouldn't tell him which one.


why don't bassists play hide and seek?
becuase noone will look for them

What's the last thing a drummer says in a band?
"Hey guys, let's do one of my songs."

how many guitarists does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

5, one to screw the bulb in, 4 to say how they could have done it better


A cannibal goes into a cannibalistic deli and sees some musician brains. The price list for the brains reads:
Bassist brains $10/lb.
Keyboardist brains $12/lb.
Drummer Brains $20/lb.
Guitarist Brains $1,000/lb.
The cannibal enquires "why are guitarist's brains so outraguiously expensive?" The man behind the counter responds "Do you have any idea how many guitarists I have to kill to get 1 pound of brain?!"

How many bass players does it take to change a light bulb?
None. The piano player can do that with his left hand.


i have some more...
 
Drat!!!

I just looked at the "similar threads" below -- seems like we've done this before, huh? Oh well... I'm still a newbie, sorry.

One more for the road, then?

How do you make a million dollars playing jazz music?

Start with four million.
 
RezN8 said:
I just looked at the "similar threads" below -- seems like we've done this before, huh? Oh well... I'm still a newbie, sorry.
Click to expand...


Naw!!! F**k them longtimers!! I'm havin' FUN!! Keep it going! Hell, copy and paste from the other threads, I don't care!

THIS ONES FOR ALL YOU NEWBIES OUT THERE!!!!
Wicka-chocka-wicka-chocka-wicka-chocka...
 
Q: What do Barbie and Britney Spears have in common?
A: Both are blonde, brainless and made out of plastic.
 
why is briteny pregnant by a man who's ex-wife just had a baby? Cause she doesnt know any better. and she's blond. Makes sense
 
What is the difference between a drummer and a large pizza?
A large pizza can feed a family of 4.
 
What's the difference between a lead singer and God?

v
v
v
v
v
v
v
v

God doesn't think he's a lead singer...

:rolleyes:
 
How many Grateful Dead fans does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

v
v
v
v
v
v
v
v
v
v

None... After it burns out, they all just follow it all over the country...

:rolleyes:
 
Farview said:
What is the difference between a drummer and a large pizza?
A large pizza can feed a family of 4.
Click to expand...


But I've heard if you get a box of 'Drummer Helper'....


:D
 
to the very few tabla players out there...

whats the difference between a cheap drum set and a trampoline?

you take your shoes off before you jump on a trampoline (trust me i would know) :D
 
What's the difference between a dead accordian player in the road and a dead skunk?
























There are skid marks in front of the skunk...
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top