First song for about 3 years !

L

lasagne

I fancy Fancy
Hey

I haven't written or recorded anything for about 3 years, and to be honest I was pretty shit then. But I just downloaded Reaper just to try out so I thought I'd write a song.

My vocals are pretty horrible as is the rest of it I suppose, but what the hell, I'd like to do some more so I'd appreciate any advice as to how to improve.

http://www.lightningmp3.com/live/file.php?id=25103

Thanks for listening
 
I have heard much worse recordings, but it's still kind of off and sounds weird. It almost sounds like I'm in a shitty hole in the wall bar on karaoke night... :laughings:
 
lasagne said:
Cool. That's exactly what I was shooting for :)
Click to expand...

:laughings: good reply ;)



Im on my laptop with earbuds so cant really comment too much on the mix...

It sounded a little lacklustre, almost like you couldnt be arsed at points, maybe intentionally...but there is a song there for sure....I think maybe the worst part of it would be the drums, rather than coming in and out Id maybe have a constant hat or ride going through there...the vocals were a little off pitch at times, we have to work with what god (or the devil) gave us..but I think they sounded like they were sitting on top...Id give them a whack of reverb, or use an automated effect on them...al la Beatles circa Revolver or sumthin

it did remind me of the beatles a bit and just needs some more experimentation and tidying up...all imho of course


dont leave it another 3 years! :)
 
I think you could improve the terrible lagging groove by upping the tempo about 10 clicks or more. There is somewhat of a song there, but It needs a much more solid rythem. The recorded sounds are not that bad, least I'd worry about. Thanks for sharing it.
 
KC - you're right, there is a bit of 'can't be arsed about it'. I did just want to finish it up as quickly as possible - I'm not into doing 2nd takes !

PDP - you're right as well - it could do with upping the tempo. That did cross my mind.

Thanks for listening and commenting
 
Hey man, I think you have a great tune here...you wrote it, right? There is a ton of potential there I think. It just seems like the execution and the mix aren't doing it justice at this point.

Rhythmically it seems to be lagging a bit and some of the pitch issues with the vocals were kind of pronounced. Mix-wise, I thought the vocal track was kind of muddy and far too dry, especially for a slower number like this.

I think if you speant more time on this with multiple takes and present it with a brighter and more spacious mix, you might really have something. Just my opinion of course. I enjoyed the song.
 
Thanks Heaty

Yes I wrote it. I did play around with upping the tempo a bit earlier following PDP's advice. I then re-recorded my vox, and it sounded much better - even my voice sounded OK - it was much easier to sing at a faster speed.

I think I may well re-do it, with an increased tempo and different instruments - see what it comes out like.

Thanks for listening
 
yeah definitely dont bin it...upping the tempo's a great idea, Id imagine most of us would have difficulty making it sound interesting vocal wise at that speed

look forward to the retake (an Im a i take guy as well so I know what you mean :) )
 
Yeah... This song, for me, was all over the place. Mix-wise, it seemed like it was all just a bunch of rushed-together tracks slammed together. The drums were way too loud in parts, and the guitar solo out of the blue in left ear was waaay too loud.

The jerkiness of the song didn't help out with the mix, either. It's like the song can't decide what to be, so the kitchen sink was thrown in, too.

Good effort on coming back to song-writing, though. Keep it workin'!
 
Decent song.

The vocals have quite a few pitch issues. I also thought the performance was a little flat. Almost as though you were just trying to get through a take rather than really nail a take. They were bone dry too. I think just a hint of a small room verb might be nice. Or maybe a small vocal plate. But not very wet.

You might need to compress the vox more - or do some fader riding. Words at the end of phrases tend to get lost behind the piano.

The snare sounded like someone hitting a paper grocery bag. I'd look for better samples.
 
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