Cowboy Up

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Cowboy Up©

Words & Music by
Buck Stewart

© Buck Stewart / April 2004

It felt like fate that we should meet
She was standing on the corner of my street
Weather dark and rainy with a little sleet
I tripped and fell right over her feet

But now she’s gone
And I’m out of luck
I guess it’s time to Cowboy Up.

Introduced her to my best friend Pete
He agreed that she was mighty sweet
A dream come true, she was replete
Not many women could compete

She stole my heart
And she stole my truck
I guess it’s time to Cowboy Up.

Finally true love, I felt complete
Chances like this just don’t repeat
Floating on clouds was such a treat
Until she pulled her surprise retreat

Took my friend
And trampled my pluck
I guess it’s time to Cowboy Up.

Had a little talk with myself
Don’t feel sorry for yourself
She’s so gone you big dumb elf
Time to take yourself off that shelf

Put your boots back on
Give that shirt a tuck
Get on out there and Cowboy Up!

Get on out there and Cowboy Up!
 
You've got the start of something.

In 'Six Steps to Songwriting Success' (a book highly recommended on this forum) the author makes the point "show, don't tell". If you listen (especially to country radio), you'll hear examples that you never noticed before.

Weather dark and rainy with a little sleet
I tripped and fell right over her feet

But now she’s gone
And I’m out of luck
I guess it’s time to Cowboy Up.

For me, this passage worked - I could hear Tim McGraw or Trace Adkins singing these lines.

Stuff like this, however, is symptomatic of getting lazy and rushing to finish a lyric.

Floating on clouds was such a treat
Until she pulled her surprise retreat

Took my friend
And trampled my pluck


You've got a good form and a good start - keep working on making every line as strong as possible. Could you really hear Keith Urban singing "Floating on clouds was such a treat"?

Hope this helps and keep posting!
 
To clarify what I meant by 'show don't tell', your line about the darkness and sleet and tripping over someone's feet was much more effective than saying 'I ran into this hot chick...'

You want to do the same thing with each situation - show it 'visually' rather than just saying what happened.
 
Thanks for your help mrx, I'm new at this so I appreciate all the help I can get.
 
No problem. You have 'form' figured out, which puts you way ahead of many beginners!
 
I'd also ditch the word "replete". Nobody uses that word in every day conversation.

You do have the start of something good here though...but the first version is rarely the best version. Don't settle for it. Rewrite, rewrite, rewrite...

A
www.aaroncheney.com
 
Thanks Aaron. It's always encouraging when someone is willing to take the time to help a newbie.
 
A little rewrite. I'm actually liking the rhymes for the most part. I see it as a silly kinda fun thing IMOHO

It felt like fate that we should meet
She was standing on the corner of my street
Weather dark and rainy with a little sleet
I tripped and fell right over her feet

But now she’s gone
And I’m out of luck
I guess it’s time to Cowboy Up.

Introduced her to my best friend Pete
He agreed that she was mighty sweet
A lot of woman with a lot of heat
I didn’t realize I’d have to compete

She stole my heart
And she stole my truck
I guess it’s time to Cowboy Up.

Finally true love, I felt complete
Chances like this just don’t repeat
I though I’d pulled off quite a feat
Until she made her surprise retreat

Took my friend
And trampled my pluck
I guess it’s time to Cowboy Up.

Had a little talk with myself
She’s so gone you big dumb elf
It’s way past time to get off that shelf

Put your boots back on
Give that shirt a tuck
Get on out there and Cowboy Up!

Don’t let her get you down
Get on out there and Cowboy Up!

© Buck Stewart / April 2004
 
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