pistolgrip
New member
hey, id love some feedback or suggestions on my new tune
thanks!
http://pistolgrip.bandcamp.com/track/calvin-hobbes
thanks!
http://pistolgrip.bandcamp.com/track/calvin-hobbes
Calvin & Hobbes Song!!! :)
- Thread starter pistolgrip
- Start date
starbuck26
New member
Form and content. I love Calvin and Hobbes, which is the reason why I clicked on this link to begin with.
You wrote the song from Calvin's point of view. I never imagined Calvin to be an auto-tuned hot 97 mc. It just doesn't make any sense.
It needs to be gentler, subtler, goofier, funnier, and approach at least some of the art criticism buried in the sunday strips.
I think the rhyme scheme is bland. You'd probably be better off having a look at the intros to the Authoritative Calin and Hobbes or the Essential or the Days are Just Packed and basing the scheme off of one of Waterson's long poems. And give the characters some color.
Sweet website, though. Elegant and profesh.
You wrote the song from Calvin's point of view. I never imagined Calvin to be an auto-tuned hot 97 mc. It just doesn't make any sense.
It needs to be gentler, subtler, goofier, funnier, and approach at least some of the art criticism buried in the sunday strips.
I think the rhyme scheme is bland. You'd probably be better off having a look at the intros to the Authoritative Calin and Hobbes or the Essential or the Days are Just Packed and basing the scheme off of one of Waterson's long poems. And give the characters some color.
Sweet website, though. Elegant and profesh.
TheChikenMaster
I'm Unbalanced
Its cool but sounds to grown up. Make it less aggressive.