that made a big difference in the beginning part... that's a pretty sick melody, but when the guitar comes in it still sounds off.. partly because the keys are off.. it's imitating the vocals, but not well.. there is also no snare drum that I could hear, so the beat is not grooving like it wants to... the guitar sound is not that good either.. I can definitely hear where your going with this, but somethings not right.. it's almost too discord at times..
I would redo those keys, and get a better drumbeat.. or better drum machine.. The melody in this tune is great, but I think more of a Sabbath type sound in that chorus is what it needs..
feel free to ignore all of this..