I don't think anything without a vocal in it has a chance in commercial music.
That depends. For the 99% of all the music that's broadcast...stuff that everybody hears, and few listen to [commercial music], vocals are almost always absent. The primary source of most of this music is production music publishers and libraries. Few of them will even accept submissions with a vocal on it. The clients want music that can be voiced-over...or work as a 'floor' to a movie or advert...or as a backdrop bumper for radio and TV shows and spots. These same publishers, however, want the publishers' rights to the vocal, if one exists: if it's good stuff, and has the potential to sell in a pop music outlet, they'll pitch it. They will exploit the work in whichever way it can make money for them...and the artist. Much vocal commercial work is 'for hire'...or projects commissioned, and given to seasoned artists with a track record.
Monkus: your tune has a lot of potential. Here's what i'd do to make it more attractive...
Use a light instrumentation to substitute for the voices...pan flute...or actual voices singing la la's or something that won't distract from the stuff laid upon it in commercial aps. Follow the instructions at the publishers' sites.
Use a microphone to get the guitars sounding like real guitars...fret noise...dynamics...woodiness.
There's a synth'd chording part? Get it away from the guitars, in its own patch of the panned field.....or widened over the whole..like orchestral strings...or substitute orchestral strings...something with a contrasting quality of tone v. the acoustics. The field is panned kinda narrow, the two instruments are nearly indistinguishable.
Last, go to a production music website, like Manhattan Production Music Library, and listen for a couple hours to some genres like yours. Listen for the quality, ambience, pan, texture, etc. Listen with new ears to film music..songs, score, scene-floors. The general workmanship of that stuff is very, very sophisticated. Note the authors' names...you'll be surprised at who's producing that music...people you'll know....the standards are very high. But there's room for beginners with interesting new sounds and recording protocols.
I like the tune you posted a lot...as I do much of your work. Don't change the arrangements or notes...concentrate on the sounds, pan, ambience: and don't worry about vocals: they're not in-demand....check it out on the 'submission instructions' of production music publishers' websites...where they sometimes solicit new talent to submit. [not those "send us your hit songs" ripoff places...vanity publishers, etc] Demand for vocal tracks is rare.
Do a google: "submissions" "production music publishers" There are hundreds of firms in the business....all over the world. Dig a little. Learn much. Follow the instructions, and submit. You're very close to what many of them search for, IMHO. I can imagine your piece in film, easily.
Submit; expect rejections; keep submitting until you find a house that hears what it likes..and thinks it can sell.......different houses specialize with different clients, often: some sell a lot of garage rock, others, soul, etc.
Nice work. Refine the instruments' sound and pan, foremost. The vocal track is a great listen...just a little too low to grab the verbage.
And, most important, start getting your work in the mail...or begin on-line subs, without delay. Don't wait until you think it's 'perfect'. Let the publisher determine that. You'll be surprised, once you start paying attention to the 99% of music that you heard and never listened to, what sells!
Also, begin to note the names of companies that provide music for the DVD's you watch, etc. That's a good way to find legit places that actually make sales. You want their representation, if you can get it. But keepr in-mind that a lot of start-ups looking for new artists are run by experienced publishers who've built successful businesses, and sold to large companies like SONY. They're repeating their success, often. It's a different universe than the pop music chicken chase. And a lot of pop music artists have jumped the broom into the commercial industry because they're tired of getting screwed by 'labels' and 'distributors'.
Good luck!
Sorry man, but
