What's good? The beat is good, certainly on par with what's on the radio. I'm a melody guy and it's not all that 'melodic' ... more beat-oriented. But it gets the job done.
What's not so good? The vocals ... that stereo/spread thing that you're doing is not doing justice to the vocals. Let me put it to you this way... VERSES should be in mono, and dryish (so that they are intelligible). Unless you have a very good reason to deviate from this general rule, keep things dryish and right up the middle... no messing around with the stereo image with verses.
What's bad? The chorus/hook. First let me say that I find the general theme of the song (taking another guys girl/wife/lady from him by force with backup from your friends) kinda unappealing. Then there's the simpleton chorus (whatcha gonna do or wTF you gonna do. Seems like you can work a bit harder to get something better. But that's not what I don't like. The chorus is a mess soundwise. First it's distorted. Then it's way out of balance compared to the way how the verses blended with the music. And when you combine a chorus and hook that is rather simpleton with a sonic mess I gotta call foul.
There is place for potential, but you gotta record that chorus better or do something different. My preference would be different lyrics that are a bit more imaginative.
First off, I appreciate your honesty. Serious.
Secondly, I think this was more of a test run, it was the first time I've ever recorded with anyone other than myself. Was kind of a mess, took forever to do, kept screwing up, was having technical issues. By the end, it sounded so horrid we were discouraged to do anything else. and trust me, it sounded MAD worse, previously.
I opened it up and edited out a few parts, and just left it. It was bugging me so bad, to hear the vocals, the verse's, and the chorus so often that I couldn't take it, plus my roomies were throwin' a fit of hearing repetition.
The Karma song is a LOT more clean, obviously it also needs work on the vocal side of things, and I'll get to that too.
Again, I appreciate the honesty.
The songs lyrics weren't intended to be percieved as taking another mans woman, as my verse states I just didn't think he shoulda stepped to me like he did, I was just complimenting her. But by his actions of stepping to me, I got offended and told him that he better hope she don't wanna come home with me by the end of the night, basically.
Very egotistical, and not something most people want ot hear. But it was meant to be simple for our first run through, we're working on some much better stuff. I just need to crank out a few more beats.
Re