a tune with vocals

Hey there! I dig a few of the sounds you are using here. My main gripe is with the lyrics and singing. The repetitive chorus is way too much and kind of senseless. I didn't find any real content in the song to sink my teeth into or relate to. I think the singing was ok but I really didn't like the vocal tone much.

The lead kicked ass.

The drums were fine IMO.

The main thing that gets me is this tune gives it's chorus up like a cheap hooker and keeps repeating it. Mix-wise it's fine.
 
What would you to to change the vocal tone? I guess the tune could use another verse maybe... or a bridge...

I guess I just got really used to the arrangement and didn't notice

Thanks for the feedback

Shred
 
Geez...I dunno...different singer?:eek:

Some verses would help a lot.

It's really not that bad, when I criticize music I try to keep playability in mind. This is not something I would put into rotation.

The vocal could use some feeling and harmony.
 
There is 3 part harmony in the chorus.

The song has just 2 verses... My wife is doing lead vocal
The are 3 choruses with an extra line at the end(2 lines per chorus and an extra at the end)... I guess to me that doesn't seem over repetition (but of course, I play in certain clubs that want to hear "You,,, Shook me Allll Night Long......." about 40 times in a song.... LOL!

Thanks of the Feedback

Shred
 
I think the guitars and vocals sound very good on their own, it's just that the tones don't blend together well. The guitar has a very modern sound while the vocals have that late 70's early 80's sound to them.

A live drum track might also help mesh the sounds together, but you did a pretty good job programing.

Try a little less reverb on the vocals maybe?? I really have no clue what to do with a female voice. Her voice sorta sounds like the singer from Blondie. Maybe listen to some of their stuff to get ideas. Just try a little of this and that to see if ya find anything that sounds cool.

You've got a really good thing going in being able to share your art and collaborate with your wife. I keep trying to convince my girlfriend to sing for me, but she gets mic shy as soon as the record button is pressed. I swear if she would start to play the guitar I bought her and sing a little I'd be sending a ring her way!

Good luck! I envy you guys!

Rock on!
Pat
 
Your right... my wife's voice is tough... my idea was to go with a more modern guitar tone and try a more classic rock vocal sound...but I have to agree... I think there are frequencies conflicting with the voice and guitar... I'm still working on it...

I'll try a little less reverb... and try to cut a slightly different eq hole for the lead vocal

Thank for the listen Pat

Shred
 
Hi

I should so be doing homework right now. Or working, since I'm at work.

I think that with regard to mix issues, I can't be of any help, but with the singing...I would say your wife might want to break up the phrasing a little bit. It has a very regimented vocal feeling, almost robotic. I've always been a fan of laying back a little with respect to phrasing and tempo. That is what my style is, definitely, but I think it could help on this song, tho. I also think that this might be a workaround with the comments about repetition. Have her break it up a bit, lay behind the tempo some even. Do little vocal riffs every once in awhile so the last verse is a bit different than the one before it.

I don't know if this will get you anything near a classic rock vocal sound. Any reference to look at? Specific song sounds you had in mind?

Let her work with it a little and find her own voice within the song. If she wants to, maybe when no one's around. This is often hard to do and feel comfortable about letting someone hear the difference you've just made. Opens you up to a whole new can of criticism. Maybe some extra personality will come out in it. This, on top of any eq stuff you might change (but that I know nothing about) might be just the ticket.

I know that when my old band would give me songs that were already written, that is what I would do with them. Just play them again and again, and ask for an instrumental only version as well as one with words, and I would just re-sing over and over, until I discovered my natural melodic tendencies coming out and I could then finally make it mine. That is ultimately the only thing that would bring it all home. They seemed pretty happy with that. But basically, musically speaking, it's the only instrument I know how to play, so why not re-work the phrasing, or slightly alter the melody to be more lax, to fit my instrument?


Have a great day.
 
I think that with regard to mix issues, I can't be of any help, but with the singing

Hey kgirl72, I know you from the Cakewalk forum :) ....you should come here more often! Good critique! This board isn't just about mixing, you know! :D

(btw, I'm listening to the song right now, will report later on)
 
I think Kgirl nailed it.

I'm counting like 12-13 eigth notes in a row (7 to 8 of the same note sometimes), and it seems to lack emotional impact because it just seems too syncopated with the rhythm tracks.
 
Thanks guys, I'm honored.

I am on these boards everyday! This is pretty much all I do at work anymore. Don't tell my superiors. :o
 
And don't tell JMarcomb! I was going to put a vocal on his Dust in the Wind. I have done it many times, but have never sent it to him, because I'm still fighting with this ingrained melody in order to interpret it MY way. And, I have no dang clue how to work all these knobs and faders in any sort of appropriate manner. So, Jeff, if you're ever reading this...don't be surprised if when you're like, say, 70, you get an email from your old long lost pal.

See you guys,
Kirstin
 
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