A CHILD OF THE CITY -- Could use some feedback. . .

paddedcell

paddedcell

Doggy Claws
A CHILD OF THE CITY -- Revised mix

Some many years ago, I recorded a number of songs at Sage & Sound Recording Studio in Hollywood. I’m linking one of those songs for critique, and it requires a couple of bits of “backstory”. (“A Child of the City”)

First, we recorded the basic tracks of this song, which were reduced to a stereo mix. This includes the drums, synth bass, keyboards (electric and acoustic piano), and vocals. I never finished the song at the studio, because I really had no idea of what I wanted to do to fill it out. The result was a relatively flat rendition of the song, without much appeal to me.

Since I’ve now been getting my own little rat hole of a studio going, I’ve come up with what I think are some good ideas, and I more-or-less finished this one out (at last).

I should mention that the vocals are a little pitchy here and there. It’s not really the singer’s fault. The song was placed at the top of her range in many places, and the dumbshit songwriter (that would be me) didn’t know enough to be able to transpose things to a better key for her. She’s a trouper, though, and charged into it anyway, with what I think is a pretty good result overall.

I’m submitting this for 1) general critique of everything or anything (not sure if the brass I added is too loud or not, etc.); and, 2) to find out whether I’m getting the straight goods from my monitor set-up. When I was getting the studio assembled, my initial work tended to be very bass-heavy, and that’s about when I discovered HR.com and “bass traps”(!) When I installed the bass traps, the difference was striking.

At this point, I feel like I may finally be getting an accurate sound out of my monitors, but I only have a couple of systems upon which to test the result. Sounds reasonably good in the car, so-so on my cheapo bedroom system, and way too bassy on my computer speakers (which are way too bassy on everything).

What do you think? Suggestions?

https://soundcloud.com/diaphonedog/solid-blue-sky-a-child-of-the-city

Here is the second mix of this song:

https://soundcloud.com/diaphonedog/a-child-of-the-city-mix-2
 
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The vocals sound weak - def at her limit.
Her voice sounds like it's made for musical theater etc.
The synth horns are too loud.
Bass level seems fine but the drums need some lifting.
The lead guitar is mainly fizz.
The song seems fine.
Some tweaking may be all it needs.
 
My thoughts (listening via headphones) (broadly similar to Rayc's):

1 I didn't mind the vocals. She doesn't have a typical pop voice. It seems to me to be more like a 'seventies celtic rock' voice, the sort of voice you would hear from Fotheringay, Steeleye Span or Pentangle. It does lack definition and presence, like as it if was recorded on a cassette.

2 The synth horns were too loud . . . it's like someone slathering sauce all over their chips to make them taste nice, until all you taste is sauce and no chips. I'd push them back and spread them wide to add a touch of character to the song, rather than being a feature. Same with the synths generally . . . there is just too much going on.

3 Together bass and drums worked well, but need to come forward

4 I liked the song and its structure. I noticed a sprinkling of interesting chords here and there.

If all you have is a mix of the original song, you may not be able to much more than you have., specially if the original mix is inherently dull (like it's come off a cassette, or from a copy of a tape).
 
Very pleasent intro
The lead guitar on the right has a very, very harsh tone. The tones in general are a bit rough. They do fit together as a cohesive whole.
The vocal could be louder. The synth hits are drowing them out completely. I thought the song was in Chinese since I couldn't understand a word she was saying until the chorus kicked in.
Great vibrato on the voice.
@1:55/6/7 I'm sure that I was able to hear some gentle crackling. Might be clipping.
 
Nice singing voice.

Since most of the sounds are canned, I'd work on levels.

I think the bass is too loud. So are the horns. And the kick. There is a synth on the right that's a bit loud.

The vocal is a bit too soft, although reducing the levels of the bass/kick/horns might help. The vocal may tolerate a *small* boost at around 5Khz.
 
Hey guys, thanks so much for this! I'm taking notes like crazy, and I think I'll try to modify the mix (probably not tonight; I'm virtually dead on my feet).

The stereo mix tape I used was a 1st generation off of the stereo master, so it's not ideal. I still haven't found the stereo master or the original tracking tape (24 track, 2"). That would be helpful, of course. A few people listened to the song and thought the horns were too far back, but I think I overcompensated -- I should go with my gut feeling sometimes. . .

The "guitar" part isn't really guitar (which I'm sure you probably figured out). I don't play guitar, so I constructed the sound with synths and a distortion box. I really like the sound of guitars, but I've never been able to guitar very well -- I just don't quite connect well enough with frets and strings. So I try to get my guitar fix via synth. I wanted something sort of "hairy" sounding to offset the smooth sounds of the horns, vocals and piano (although the Casio electric is kind of a gritty "piano" sound).

I may be able to bring up the presence of the drum tracks by pushing everything else back a little (especially the brass). In any event, I think I'll try another mix tomorrow night and post it.

Really appreciate the help! :D
 
gecko zzed said:
My thoughts (listening via headphones) (broadly similar to Rayc's):

1 I didn't mind the vocals. She doesn't have a typical pop voice. It seems to me to be more like a 'seventies celtic rock' voice, the sort of voice you would hear from Fotheringay, Steeleye Span or Pentangle. It does lack definition and presence, like as it if was recorded on a cassette.

2 The synth horns were too loud . . . it's like someone slathering sauce all over their chips to make them taste nice, until all you taste is sauce and no chips. I'd push them back and spread them wide to add a touch of character to the song, rather than being a feature. Same with the synths generally . . . there is just too much going on.

3 Together bass and drums worked well, but need to come forward

4 I liked the song and its structure. I noticed a sprinkling of interesting chords here and there.

If all you have is a mix of the original song, you may not be able to much more than you have., specially if the original mix is inherently dull (like it's come off a cassette, or from a copy of a tape).
Click to expand...


Re the vocals, you and rayc nailed it. Laura's background was in musical theatre, and she was the lead singer in a band I was in at the time. Pat Benatar was big at that point in time, and we did a lot of Benatar stuff, which she handled really well. She would probably do well with Evanescence type stuff, too.
 
The main vocal needs to come up (but not in the chorus). The fake horns stabs need to come down - they're drowning the vocal. The synth sounds that come in with the chorus vocal need to come down a bit, especially on the first entry - they startle. They also sound a bit pitchy at some points. Is it a midi part?

You know what I think really? She's got a lovely lovely voice and a great delivery, but the arrangement is swamping her rather than serving her. The song's about the vocal and you've mixed it so that the opposite effect is achieved. C'mon - fix it. I want to hear this one done right. She's got a gentle folky voice, she's not Janis Joplin. Serve that.
 
I've added my revised mix to the first post of this thread. It may not be quite there yet, but I'm sure it's better. I brought the brass section down significantly, and I did do a 5K boost of the vocals. Of course, since the vocals are part of the "canned" music (vocals, keyboards, drums and bass), it also has an effect on these other instruments, but I'm not sure it was a bad effect at all. I'm much happier with the overall effect and the vocal presence.

While I was fiddling around with EQ, I noticed that when I did the transfer from the tape to the 2488, I had a slight, broad boost in the bass. I don't know why I thought it was necessary, but I flattened it. I was also monitoring my peak levels more carefully -- I didn't find obvious evidence of clipping, but I gave it more headroom than before.

What do you think?
 
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