Temporary Awake

[Ashway]

Temporary Awake by The Source | Free Listening on SoundCloud

Latest update:
Temporary Awake Mod2 by The Source | Free Listening on SoundCloud

Hi. This is a tune I am working on. Lyrics not yet finished, and so on...

Any suggestions about the mix?

I havent used a reference mix yet...

 

[TripleM]

The bass that comes in at :30 is REALLY rumbly. I'm on nearfields. I can only imagine what it sounds like on a big system.

Good singing. Some of the low notes get kind of out of the singer's range. It gets covered up fairly badly in the chorus.

The synth bass is a little sterile sounding.

Cymbals are very wide. Snare/kick are way back in the mix.

You might want to think about instrumentation. There is a lot of stuff going on. Right now it's a pretty cluttered mix - at least in spots.

 

[andrushkiwt]

Like 3M said, there's a lot going on. I'd rethink the arrangement a little. Lots of things being covered over and fighting for attention. The opening instrument gets completely covered when everything kicks in, and if it's playing but covered, then it's hogging up volume, even if you can't hear it. Really, less can be more. I would try rearranging things, for sure.

Really interesting tune, and I wanted to listen again, but everything was really fighting with each other. Just a suggestion, but I'd think about setting your heavy guitars farthest in the stereo field, and set the lead synth inwards. The song will sound like it's opening up more when it kicks in, rather than collapsing in on itself and being overly crowded.

It's clear you have lots of ideas, which is a good thing. But the next step is deciding which ones stay and which ones can go, for the sake of a good mix. Great song man, chorus especially

 

[Ashway]

The bass that comes in at :30 is REALLY rumbly. I'm on nearfields. I can only imagine what it sounds like on a big system.

Good singing. Some of the low notes get kind of out of the singer's range. It gets covered up fairly badly in the chorus.

The synth bass is a little sterile sounding.

Cymbals are very wide. Snare/kick are way back in the mix.

You might want to think about instrumentation. There is a lot of stuff going on. Right now it's a pretty cluttered mix - at least in spots.

Good day good sir and thank you for feedback.

Everyone I talk to seem to think the base is a synthbase, but it is actually me playing a regular yamaha base with no effects, only compressor and eq, well and a distortion thing on the parabell basetrack but nothing much... Just a fun fact "sterile is a true discription though.."

You guys gave me great feedback... and its in line with what I was fearing, to messy... Mixing is not my strong area so I will look at your posts while mixing today.

PS: What did you mean by; The voice gets covered up fairly badly in the chorus?

 

[Ashway]

Like 3M said, there's a lot going on. I'd rethink the arrangement a little. Lots of things being covered over and fighting for attention. The opening instrument gets completely covered when everything kicks in, and if it's playing but covered, then it's hogging up volume, even if you can't hear it. Really, less can be more. I would try rearranging things, for sure.

Really interesting tune, and I wanted to listen again, but everything was really fighting with each other. Just a suggestion, but I'd think about setting your heavy guitars farthest in the stereo field, and set the lead synth inwards. The song will sound like it's opening up more when it kicks in, rather than collapsing in on itself and being overly crowded.

It's clear you have lots of ideas, which is a good thing. But the next step is deciding which ones stay and which ones can go, for the sake of a good mix. Great song man, chorus especially

Hi there. And thank you for commenting!

Yes, you gave me the idea that I might switch between the crowdy synths and the guitars, instead of choosing I might use both in different parts of the song.

The guitars are farthers in stereo, but so is the synths... So I will try the technique you just offered me, placing the synths more to the middle.

 

[Ashway]

Any better?

Temperary Awake mod by The Source | Free Listening on SoundCloud

 

[spantini]

I have to say, the second version sounds much better - the intro, mainly. Also, I like the points where the vocal rises.. that and the melody at those points remind me of Bowie.

 

[Robus]

Much better. There's is still a lot of inconsistency in the mix. It gives the impression that you are unsure which elements are in the lead, and which are in a supporting role at any given moment in the song. The vocals sound interesting, might as well highlight them.

I'd suggest you roll this mix all the way back to raw tracks. Rebuild the mix from the bottom up, highlighting the vocal.

 

[spantini]

Much better. There's is still a lot of inconsistency in the mix. It gives the impression that you are unsure which elements are in the lead, and which are in a supporting role at any given moment in the song. The vocals sound interesting, might as well highlight them.

I'd suggest you roll this mix all the way back to raw tracks. Rebuild the mix from the bottom up, highlighting the vocal.

+1 ^

 

[Ashway]

Thank you both for making suggestions/commenting. I will post my last try on a "remix" before stripping everything down, focusing on arranging and lyrics, maybe a bridge and so on...

"I uploaded the wrong track"

Here is the correct one:

Temporary Awake Mod2 by The Source | Free Listening on SoundCloud

 

[Bulls Hit]

Cool tune. I really like how the bass ramps up at 0.30 with all that power. Good vocals too. My only nit is the extra(?) swishy cymbals that smear themselves about the place periodically. You've already got the hats grooving away, I'm not sure the extra swishiness is adding anything. Good melodies though and nice job on the composition and arrangement generally

 

[Ashway]

Thank you. Yes its a kick and crash recorded to an audio track hitting here and there. I took away the low frequencies and lowered the volume but I guess I will just remove it in the end.

 

[andrushkiwt]

Honestly, I liked the first version best. The song completely changed without any guitars, and without that second lead instrument. Those heavier guitars really made the song, for me. It gave the chorus, as well, a heavier feel.

 

[Ashway]

Honestly, I liked the first version best. The song completely changed without any guitars, and without that second lead instrument. Those heavier guitars really made the song, for me. It gave the chorus, as well, a heavier feel.

Thanks man. I agree. I should have the electric guitars! More «soul»... I will build it up from the ground later on.

Anyway thank you all. I will post it when I have a finished mix, mastered and ready for the airways

 

[VomitHatSteve]

I jumped straight to the Mod2 mix.
The low end still seems rather cluttered. When the chorus kicks in, everything shifts up the audio spectrum, and you have a more listenable mix. It's still a little cluttered, but it's better.
I might split the difference. Try to shift some of the low, rumbly instruments up.

I went back and listened to the first, guitary mix. I think the guitars are a good touch. Since they're mid-to-high range, I think they're really not the culprit for the clutter.

Oh, check for vocal smacks, and some of those low notes are too low for you.

*edit: positivity* I like the song itself a lot. It sounds like some kind post-vaporwave Bowie-does-industrial thing.

 

[24Fretz]

Good progress, catchy tune.

I like it too. You're making progress with it. Taking out the guitars helped the clarity a lot, but I agree that I would like them to come back. Probably have to cut bass and scoop mids heavily to work well with your arpeggiated synth, which I would also scoop heavily, at least during parts where there are vocals. They're great as they are before the vocals come in, but then they clash with the voice and the mix gets messy. If you were able to cut out the sub-octave during the verse, that would help too.

I would bring up the low cut frequency on the bass guitar, or if you don't want to do that, use a ducking compressor so that the kick can come through.

And last, I think your snare could use more crack and less body in order to not get lost in those crowded middle frequencies.

 

[Ashway]

I jumped straight to the Mod2 mix.
The low end still seems rather cluttered. When the chorus kicks in, everything shifts up the audio spectrum, and you have a more listenable mix. It's still a little cluttered, but it's better.
I might split the difference. Try to shift some of the low, rumbly instruments up.

I went back and listened to the first, guitary mix. I think the guitars are a good touch. Since they're mid-to-high range, I think they're really not the culprit for the clutter.

Oh, check for vocal smacks, and some of those low notes are too low for you.

*edit: positivity* I like the song itself a lot. It sounds like some kind post-vaporwave Bowie-does-industrial thing.

If I am understanding correctly, you are saying that the guitars were not the problem with the first mix so I could safely re-enter them.

I will mix with my monitors only from now on... My headphones are "lying", since they are very bright compared to everything else Ive listened to...

Also I will use a reference mix next time..

Not giving up! Thank you for commenting

 

[Ashway]

I like it too. You're making progress with it. Taking out the guitars helped the clarity a lot, but I agree that I would like them to come back. Probably have to cut bass and scoop mids heavily to work well with your arpeggiated synth, which I would also scoop heavily, at least during parts where there are vocals. They're great as they are before the vocals come in, but then they clash with the voice and the mix gets messy. If you were able to cut out the sub-octave during the verse, that would help too.

I would bring up the low cut frequency on the bass guitar, or if you don't want to do that, use a ducking compressor so that the kick can come through.

And last, I think your snare could use more crack and less body in order to not get lost in those crowded middle frequencies.

I see. You are all saying pretty much the same thing in general, though with different words, apprechiate your feedback, specially about the snare crack and arpeggio-synth in the verse.. (very concise info) so I guess you are all on point/agreeing in a sence. I will have to google ducking compressor though!

 

[VomitHatSteve]

If I am understanding correctly, you are saying that the guitars were not the problem with the first mix so I could safely re-enter them.

I will mix with my monitors only from now on... My headphones are "lying", since they are very bright compared to everything else Ive listened to...

Also I will use a reference mix next time..

Not giving up! Thank you for commenting

Yeah. Guits didn't really seem a problem. They were one of the highest instruments in their section.

+1 for mixing on monitors, especially if your cans are overly bright.

 

[andrushkiwt]

Yeah. Guits didn't really seem a problem.

Agree with Steve. Guitars sounded pretty good, and they almost put the song in a different genre. There were some nice melodies in them, and I as well don't think they were part of the problem. It sounds like the issue might be the intro synth - like it has some nasty frequencies popping out and low end garbage too. And the combination of that one with the others was bothersome. But not the guitars, IMO.