solo proyect, postrock, please bash

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LordLTSmash

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Hi,

I recorded and produced this myself (well, at least I recorded all vocals and bass since piano, synths and drums [ezdrummer] were performed using midi).

I would like to get your criticizing, specially speaking about my vocals and harmonies... but also about the mix. I'm planning to record this with real drums and guitar soon.

here's the track
NOTICE IT CANNOT BE EMBEDDED, OPEN IN YOUR BROWSER
https://soundcloud.com/benjam-n-mart-nez-velasco/fluoxetine/s-JlCNT

Thanks
 
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The link works, but not the embed.

Not too bad. Sounds kind of like a song for an old James Bond movie. I didn't like the intro, seems like an after thought.

Some spots near the beginning, the vocals are little pitchy, but tightens up once you get going. I also felt there is too much reverb going on. I would suggest to dial it back a bit so it's not so noticeable. Might be some other little nitpicks, but all in all, not bad.

Hey Aguascalientes.... I was in Mexico City this past week and was asked if I could help out up there. I said No. :D I was in San Luis Potosi a few weeks ago, too.
 
There are couple things you might want to play with regarding the instrumental segment that kicks in at 1.53. The first is that it's a great big sound but it's all panned right, which is kind of weird. The other issue is that the sound is so diffuse - I want it better defined - it's a sort of foggy haze of sound over there on the right. Finally, I get that last dry chord is a kind of shockingly abrupt resolution to the question the song's asking right at the end, but it's pretty unmusical given everything else that's gone on in the song before that. It's sort of like how some kids end a story when they're not sure how to do it - either 'Then I woke up and realized it had all been a dream' or 'Then they walked out into the street and got hit by a bus. The end.' :D How about hitting that last chord and then having a series of echoes trailing out for a few seconds?
 
I echo the comments above. The track is structured well and has the melodrama of a movie theme. I enjoyed your use of harmonies. They were very well rendered. I thought the vocal was good; strong and confident and energetic.

What the track needs now is attention to detail: examining each track and its place within the song, and making sure that it has a definite place. Watch endings of takes (for example, I noted somewhere in the middle of the song a guitar ended rather abruptly. That may have been deliberate, but it sounds like a mistake. Note Dobro's comments about the end.

I wasn't convinced by the drum track; it did remind me of the style of drumming in, say, Court of the Crimson King, and was overly busy for my taste these days. I felt the same way about the bass too, but I think that's not a real bass, right?

I would be dead keen to see how it sounded with bass and drums simplified a bit.
 
Yeah, the intro synth didn't really fit well, better to use a piano intro, IMO. In the beginning there is a synthed string part 'hovering' way back on the right channel, not sure if its supposed to be there, or not - I had to turn it up to hear that there was something there.
I like the overall sound. I got that the abrupt take down of volume to the piano-and-voice-only was supposed to be like that, but maybe it could be smoothed out a little.

I think the reason the embed didn't work is the track is marked as 'private'.
 
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Chili said:
The link works, but not the embed.

Not too bad. Sounds kind of like a song for an old James Bond movie. I didn't like the intro, seems like an after thought.

Some spots near the beginning, the vocals are little pitchy, but tightens up once you get going. I also felt there is too much reverb going on. I would suggest to dial it back a bit so it's not so noticeable. Might be some other little nitpicks, but all in all, not bad.

Hey Aguascalientes.... I was in Mexico City this past week and was asked if I could help out up there. I said No. :D I was in San Luis Potosi a few weeks ago, too.
Click to expand...

Haha thanks. Yes, I wanted it to have an intro in order for it not to begin inmediately but I guess it didn't work... should I dial back the reverb on the lead vocal or on the background ones? perhaps both? haha. What kind of job were you doing here in Mexico?



dobro said:
There are couple things you might want to play with regarding the instrumental segment that kicks in at 1.53. The first is that it's a great big sound but it's all panned right, which is kind of weird. The other issue is that the sound is so diffuse - I want it better defined - it's a sort of foggy haze of sound over there on the right. Finally, I get that last dry chord is a kind of shockingly abrupt resolution to the question the song's asking right at the end, but it's pretty unmusical given everything else that's gone on in the song before that. It's sort of like how some kids end a story when they're not sure how to do it - either 'Then I woke up and realized it had all been a dream' or 'Then they walked out into the street and got hit by a bus. The end.' :D How about hitting that last chord and then having a series of echoes trailing out for a few seconds?
Click to expand...

I panned all of the chorus vocals to the right together with the reverb effect. Should I try moving the synth "solo" to the left, or should I move some of the vocals there to be more centered? BTW I can't tell which is the "last" chord you're talking about, could you tell me exactly when is that chord being played? I believe you're talking about vocals, right?

gecko zzed said:
I echo the comments above. The track is structured well and has the melodrama of a movie theme. I enjoyed your use of harmonies. They were very well rendered. I thought the vocal was good; strong and confident and energetic.

What the track needs now is attention to detail: examining each track and its place within the song, and making sure that it has a definite place. Watch endings of takes (for example, I noted somewhere in the middle of the song a guitar ended rather abruptly. That may have been deliberate, but it sounds like a mistake. Note Dobro's comments about the end.

I wasn't convinced by the drum track; it did remind me of the style of drumming in, say, Court of the Crimson King, and was overly busy for my taste these days. I felt the same way about the bass too, but I think that's not a real bass, right?

I would be dead keen to see how it sounded with bass and drums simplified a bit.
Click to expand...

Ah thanks. I will check every track twice to make sure it makes sense...

BTW, the bass track was laid down with a fender jazz bass XD... but I used a bit of amplitube's overdrive...
Oh, and in the part that the guitar ends abruptly, yes, it was done on purpose and it doesn't sound to me like a mistake, what do think I can do to avoid it sound like that? Well, right now I can't do a lot with it since it's midi but if it sounds dirty, i will have to remove it.
 
I thought the song's atmosphere was cool. Except for the intro - put me down on the list of people who didn't think it fit. The bass tone and part are cool. Drums were OK.

I'm hearing some vocal pitchiness. I'm hearing it in the lead vocal - BGV's sound OK. The "ah's" actually sound nice. The lead vocal has a noticably different reverb than the other tracks. It didn't seem to match to me.

---------- Update ----------

Oh and I know I say this at least once a week - but double tracked lead vocals would work well on this tune. RAMI isn't here to bust my chops, so I get a freebie in when I can. :)
 
TripleM said:
I thought the song's atmosphere was cool. Except for the intro - put me down on the list of people who didn't think it fit. The bass tone and part are cool. Drums were OK.

I'm hearing some vocal pitchiness. I'm hearing it in the lead vocal - BGV's sound OK. The "ah's" actually sound nice. The lead vocal has a noticably different reverb than the other tracks. It didn't seem to match to me.

---------- Update ----------

Oh and I know I say this at least once a week - but double tracked lead vocals would work well on this tune. RAMI isn't here to bust my chops, so I get a freebie in when I can. :)
Click to expand...

Haha, I just removed the intro. i also agreed with it not matching with the song...

Why do you think the lead and BGV's have a different reverb? They don't, I just sent less volume to the vocal reverb return track from the lead vocal track... and OK, I will try and double the lead vocals.
 
LordLTSmash said:
Why do you think the lead and BGV's have a different reverb? They don't, I just sent less volume to the vocal reverb return track from the lead vocal track... and OK, I will try and double the lead vocals.
Click to expand...

In my head I was comparing the lead vocal's reverb with the instrument tracks. I just said "other tracks" but I should have been more specific. Sorry.
 
I'm gonna disagree on the intro. I actually liked that part.

+1 on the pitchiness of the vocals at the beginning.

I think that Dobro was talking about the last piano chord, which sounds a little loud in the mix.

I definitely also vote for bringing the backing vox closer to the center.
 
LordLTSmash said:
What do you mean by "pitchiness" ?
Click to expand...

Flat. Just in the intro in a couple of spots... fine throughout the rest. Nothing that a bit of Melodyne etc. probably couldn't fix.

About 2:40 when the vocal's all quiet, I'm hearing lots of hiss and processing artefacts underneath, and then we go from a really loud soft voice to a really soft loud voice, and I think the transition could use some work. Bit less reverb, and I too vote for "don't like the intro..." I'm listening to the first attempt, I see.

I think it needs an intro, just not sure that's it.

Also, the snare drum I don't like much, seems a bit weak.

I'm surprised you call this "post rock" BTW.

Out of curiousity, if no-one else is hearing some of what I'm hearing perhaps you can dismiss it and perhaps it's my new laptop's "beatsaudio" soundcard - everything seems to be bigger, brighter and more hyped than I remember...

Nice tune though... keep working at it.
 
Armistice said:
Flat. Just in the intro in a couple of spots... fine throughout the rest. Nothing that a bit of Melodyne etc. probably couldn't fix.

About 2:40 when the vocal's all quiet, I'm hearing lots of hiss and processing artefacts underneath, and then we go from a really loud soft voice to a really soft loud voice, and I think the transition could use some work. Bit less reverb, and I too vote for "don't like the intro..." I'm listening to the first attempt, I see.

I think it needs an intro, just not sure that's it.

Also, the snare drum I don't like much, seems a bit weak.

I'm surprised you call this "post rock" BTW.

Out of curiousity, if no-one else is hearing some of what I'm hearing perhaps you can dismiss it and perhaps it's my new laptop's "beatsaudio" soundcard - everything seems to be bigger, brighter and more hyped than I remember...

Nice tune though... keep working at it.
Click to expand...

You're right, there's a lot of artifacts since I recorded vocals with a very cheap USB/XLR cable, if it moves a bit it will introduce artifacts into the mix... I thought of an intro song already, most likely this would be the second track of an EP when recorded properly.
What do you think the snare needs? I could try adding more compression or trying a different sample, maybe dialing up the velocity? Haha

I'm also surprised I called this postrock, but the song has gone trhough a lot of changes, it's not what it used to be I guess... what would you call it anyways?

Thanks :)
 
I think it needs a "meatier" sample... what software are you using?
 
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